EHC On AO3

This needs to be reblogged today.

Consenting to see adult content doesn’t mean you should have to see a bunch of shit romanticizing incest and pedophilia you walnut

This is the most beautiful thing that I have seen about ao3

do u think omegaverse acknowledges covid-19 and the generation of people who permanently lost their sense of smell like how are they all scenting each other now is the omegaverse economy in shambles

actually pheromone sensing works differently from normal olfaction, since humans in our world don’t have a functioning vomeronasal organ (VNO), we don’t have any data on how covid-19 would affect a functioning VNO in omegaverse AUs

OP this is very well-written but im still hung up on how you came onstage dressed as a clown only to tear off the costume and reveal yourself as a biologist

Damn, this is impressive.

dni unless you wanna hold hands at the haunted house

As is so frequently the case im also thinking about werewolves who work in healthcare. Paramedic uniform with MEDICAL ALERT SERVICE DOG on the back.

This would be funny in multiple ways. Imagining her in human form refusing to elaborate on why her jacket says that. Coffee break and a dog biscuit. Alternatively imagining her in full dog mode very determinedly going through the first aid kit with her nose and flinging the appropriate wipes and bandages at the nearest person with thumbs

This huge dog trots up to you and hands you a little pamphlet saying hello im your nurse today we'll be doing a diabetes screening and you're like oh cute gimmick I know that's a thing you can train service dogs to do. Then two days later your very much human nurse is talking to you like you've already met and you're like girl this is our first encounter what are you talking about

Youre in the waiting room and a passing doctor takes a deep breath and immediately goes awh man okay sit down you're gonna need seizure meds in a minute

I'm picturing Enid here.

i love how there's the genre of fix-it fic where the author goes into great granular detail of how our heroes manage to avoid or undo whatever character death or other unpopular choice occurred, in a way that abides by the laws of the fictional universe and definitely required a substantial plot outline, and then there are fix-it fics where the author just went "that's bullshit and didn't happen," and we as readers all go "agreed. carry on."

I want to see a work of fiction that reverses the "vampires are snobby upper class, werewolves are brutish lower class" stereotypes

Consider a vampire's reliance on blood as a metaphor for living paycheck-to-paycheck and depending on the kindness of others to get by, and the desparation that can make one slip into taking.

[jojo pose] count dracula. [different jojo pose] nice to meet you. [jojo walk cycle] alexa, turn down the music! [the obnoxious music doesn't change volume] mr harker

Cuntula

Imagine Yoko introducing herself to Divina like this.

The biting will continue until morale improves. The biting will also continue after morale improves. The biting will continue, regardless of the state of morale. [biting noises]

Given how terrible most recipe websites are i can only imagine how bad spell websites would be

Having to navigate someone's entire life story of how they became a witch in order to get to the part where they actually talk about the gods-damned banishing ritual

the number of 'easy 3 step spell to fly' that at best do nothing, and have a good chance of doing something very bad to you is non zero

Three words "BuzzFeed Spell Hacks"

Apparently in China peach wood (Along with the rest of the plant) is believed to have properties that repel evil spirits, a little similar to silver in European legends or iron for both European fae and West Asian/Middle eastern Jinn. Taoists sometimes keep swords made of peach wood because of this. This made me realize something. If you took a peach wood stick, and attached studs to it of both silver and iron you'd end up with a club or staff (or mace, flail etc.) that would have the weaknesses of many kinds of supernatural creatures while still retaining effectiveness as a normal weapon (peach is a hardwood and silver's poor edge retention doesn't matter for studs). You could even keep adding new stud materials to get something ridiculous that affects over 120 catalogued folkloric monsters. Since you just need a few little studs you could even get some really expensive materials like meteoric iron (a thumb tip sized meteorite can still cost like 10-20 bucks I think). I could somewhat feasibly make a weapon that affects every monster ever thought to walk the earth, from vampires and werewolves to jinn and jiangshi and even mankind.

Club of Fuck That Supernatural Shit And Also Everything Else