Eerie-lateable

The nude beach has the best seashells. This fucking sucks. I love seashells but I hate penis.

Have you tried regular beaches instead?

Sometimes my dad likes to put little pills in my food. And in those pills is more of the food.

Sometimes I use a fly swatter to add patterns on my cake

I only drink loud water, which is when you pour normal water into a cup from a decent height, thus making a mess and also making it loud.

I drink giftshop water with no artificial hogs in it

Sometimes food just tastes wrong. Like no, It wasn't supposed to be this way.

Try adding a 2026 chevy silverado to your food.

Still rocking an NFT icon in this day and age is like seeing a confederate flag on the back of someone’s truck. You lost 100 years ago, fucker, it’s over.

I ate a truck once.

What am I? Some sort of mollusk? No, I am a chordate. You can't shrimpify me.

I'm not a puppygirl or a catgirl. I'm a fish. and that is satisfyingly vague and abstract enough for me

Sunburn

I just want to love and be loved. why is lunch twelve dollars now

Because taxes

It's chocolate day yall

Just a reminder, that was an icepack and it leaked on to the towel.