Eat me 😘

I see a lot on tumblr lately regarding the defense of underage participants in a certain community, as well as the underage participants expressing anger that they are not welcome on NSFW blogs. As a NSFW blogger, as well as someone who has come to know various sex laws due to their career, I thought I would clarify some things:

1. It doesn’t matter what the age of consent in your state is. Age of consent refers to the age that you are able to consent to sexual activity only.

2. Even if you are able to consent at age 16 or 17, by law you are still a minor. Pornography cannot be sold or viewed by minors.

3. If you are under 18 and you post explicit photos of yourself, you can be charged with creating and circulating child pornography, as the images contain a minor.

4. It is normal to have interests in sex and kink, regardless of age. There are safe spaces on the internet to seek these out and ask questions regarding your interests. Spaces where you can communicate with other teens, that are well moderated and do not allow adults to freely graze and prey.

5. As a minor, showing purposeful disregard for another blogger or a website’s request that no minors be present on the site (and for some explicit material, 21 is the age for legal viewership) puts the owner of that blog and/or website at risk. No one wants to see awesome sex bloggers get shut down or sex friendly spaces on the internet get hit for having underage members. Think about more than just yourselves.

Sure.

Red means stop. No more negotiation, something has crossed a line (too painful, something bad that wasn’t negotiated, etc.)

Yellow means that you need a break or that something is too much, or that if the top continues then you’re going to “red” soon.

Green means that things are going well and you want to continue if not ramp it up a little.

While a bottom might blurt out red or yellow, I’ve never seen a bottom volunteer “green”. It’s usually said in answer to when a top is checking in to make sure everything is okay. Asking “How are you?” and getting an answer of “fine” or “okay” might mean the bottom is just on autopilot and reflexively answering. Asking “What’s your color?” and getting “green” or “I was very close to yellow when you stopped” is much better.

One of my favorite doms to watch at parties was doing a pre-scene negotiation with someone he hadn’t played with before and said something like “Now, just between you and me here ;-) , my favorite color is yellow. It’s not about taking anything I can dish out. I promise you, I can always go harder. I want to know how you’re doing. I’ll likely yellow you, on purpose, a few times, just to find out where your limits are and then aim for a little below that. I don’t want to hear ‘green green green, green green red’ because then the scene’s over. I want some indication of how you’re doing and when you’re getting close to what you can handle, okay?”

This was written by Brainchild at FetLife.  (Must be a member to view).  I’ve been going through her writings this morning and so many of them resonate with me like whoa.

+++++++

1. INTELLIGENCE. Give me a smart Dom any day over the Domly Lord Macho Man. The smart guy knows He doesn’t know it all and spends an inordinate amount of time continually learning to be a better Master.

2. PATIENCE. They’re methodical. They’re used to solving complex problems. They even welcome such challenges and they know that there are subs out there that are complex and challenging as hell. These subs do not intimidate a geeky Dom.

3. APPRECIATION OF A SMART SUB. A geeky Dom loves a sub with a brain, they know You can’t fix stupid. She may not be the prettiest or have the most beautiful body around but they don’t care… They LOVE smart! Smart trumps physical beauty any day. They aren’t intimidated by such a sub and in fact welcome her wit and insight and love her mind. A sub with brains loves this right back… so many Doms can’t handle her intelligence.

4. THEY LOVE A PUZZLE. Lord knows that a smart sub can present a puzzle to most Doms. Not so the geeky Dom, He is inquisitive and loves to solve a puzzle, (it’s His nature) especially the puzzle of an intelligent and independent woman who craves to submit to the right Man. He will take his time and use his laser like mind to delve deep into her psyche, figure her out and put all the pieces together and claim her as His before she realizes what hit her (pun not intended).

5. MASTERS OF THE MIND FUCK. Intelligent subs can be quite a handful. They often outsmart their wannabe Doms seeing right through them and quickly getting bored and frustrated (insert eye rolling subbie here). Ah, but the geeky Dom can see right to the core of this subbie, knows what makes her tick and can wrap his mind around her essence and whip her little brain into a chaotic frenzy and drop her to her knees before she knows what’s happening and she’ll never see it coming. Trust me, we appreciate this ability… we crave this ability… we need this ability.

6. QUIET TIMES, NATURE WALKS AND NPR. A geeky Dom doesn’t have to be all “macho” all the time. They are confident enough in their dominance to let go and be content to hold Their sub in Their arms, spending time on walks or sitting on the back deck on a spring afternoon, listening to the birds chirping, watching the squirrels and deer romping about and just enjoying “being”. The bonding achieved doing this is incalculable. His sub is putty in His hands.

7. BETTER LOVERS. Oh yes! Lord Domly Dom thinks He’s a great lover because he has a cock Ha!. Not so the geeky Dom. He’s studied a woman’s anatomy and physiology, he knows the rhyme and reason behind her sexuality and uses it to his advantage thus making him a most exquisite lover. And when he has claimed His sub, he has studied her as a person even further and knows intimately what makes her tick, what drives her wild, what brings her to her knees begging for more.

Yes, give me a Geeky Dom any day..

Actually it’s curious, all my Doms (since I’m not a teenager anymore) were either scientists or tech guys and mostly I didn’t know that before, it came up later (I’m not this kind of person who asks for someone’s profession early on, I absolutely don’t care) after I already got interested in them. Yes, the ‘geeky’ type is definitely the best in my opinion, I can absolutely confirm that.