a dream had occurred to me. during my ritual sulking at the burden of having to get up for work, my consciousness swept out of the waking world a third time, this time into a rather peculiar hallucination.
it was just what you would expect on the most normal of days, the usual fullness of the commotion filled roads, the usual pollution from the bustling local coffee shops - one at which i happened to be. much was not to be said of what happened prior, i get up to leave after having my sweet time with my insignificant coffee, subsequently grabbing the folding chair that i had been sitting on, as i happened to be borrowing it for an allowed parameter outside, where the sun would shine. cautiously i make my way through the outer seating arrangements, crossing paths with oddly unfamiliar presences when for a dream. at my destination wait a group of cafe employees, from which a veiled fair lady catches my inconspicuous eye, one who i am familiar with in the physical realm, however, who's identity is unimportant to the context. i unassumingly reach for my last step to where i must return the chair in my possession, anxiously calculating every move and possible interactions, only to be faced with what i could not have calculated. there she was, the glistening pale yet warm face, now facing me on her feet. "i am leaving" i say, reluctantly, and merely as an act of politeness. she reaches out both of her hands around my neck and hugs me. she hugs me as if she is afraid she may never hug me again. "i must leave now" i repeat nervously, confused as to why i am fated with such a predicament despite my measurements. It perhaps did not matter. i had longed for such warmth, though i would definitely take meaning regarding the projector in reality, in my own delusion filled realm, it did not matter the slightest. there was an almost fairytale-like innocence to it. i reach out my right hand to leave the chair leaning against the wall, still keeping my left hand to myself, fully engulfed into her sudden yet melting embrace. then a sense of farewell rung through me, as though she had said "goodbye" herself explicitly, or even better, as if without the use of tongue, words were carried through vibrations from body to body, from heart to heart. i pat my left hand on her back as a feeble attempt at platonic reciprocation, momentarily feeling her scapula for she was undoubtedly a slim, delicate creature, and once it was unnatural for one to keep clinging on, she finally let go.
the rest is trivial. perhaps every dream has a purpose that the conscious self cannot comprehend to express. if so, i am left wondering what my dream might be telling me. the familiar embrace left an overwhelming remark on my barely conscious self upon waking, and suddenly intimate smells of a very distant memory altogether caressed me in such a needle sharp stinging warmth, seeped into closed wounds with intentions unclear whether to heal or to rip open.
romaincrisis
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