after coachella

i am so tired of peeing. i drink the water, which i apparently need to live or something, then i have to go put the water somewhere else five minutes later. i drink the water, i go to a place to un-drink the water, i wash my hands, i leave, then i have to drink more water. guess where that water ends up? not in me! i give the water to my body and like a child it tosses it out and demands more. all hours of the day all hours of the night no matter what i am doing my life is interrupted by piss and this is bullshit

If you’re aroused by dirty talk, that makes your genitals are voice activated

scary music… i mean, clanging and thrashing… terrifying music to send you into a panic, music that will make you run away, music that makes your teeth chatter and your skin prickle… terror music, OK, music made by demons and rabid dogs – alright? shrieking and bleak wind noises and all kinds of awful stuff… scary music

me as a hotel receptionist: *greets guests by playing hotel california but cutting it off right before they say california*

If there was an invisible man he would be blind because light would pass through his retinas.

im waking up to ash and dust i wipe my brow and i slap my nuts

im trying to prove a point to my sisters boyfriend reblog if shego is sexy

being held??????? holding someone?????????!!??????? fuck