i'm nobody! who are you?

note: they're in Year 6/10-11 years old

Neil

Was born in West Auckland but moved to Remuera. His father told him to never tell anyone.

Attended speech and drama classes secretly until his father saw it on the tuition fees. (bro was MADDDDD)

Road patrol monitor. Feels very cool with his neon orange lollipop sign.

Really good at Lit Quiz, does it 3 years in a row. Meets Todd because the school librarian puts them in the same team.

Loves Pic's Peanut Butter, begged to go to PPB World when his family visited Nelson.

Todd

Grew up in Christchurch. Was more upset about leaving his favourite bench at the Botanic Gardens than he was about leaving the house. 

The family moved to Devonport for Jeffrey’s education and didn't really consider Todd's opinion because they assumed he didn't have friends 😭

Was very upset when Video Ezy closed down.

Never played rugby and did not GAF when the Crusaders won the Super Rugby championship in 2019.

Charlie

Popular because he's he fastest boy at cross country.

Puts the Yummy apple stickers on the back of people’s blazers.

Swallowed a plastic counting bear and other maths equipment.

Loses parts of his uniform constantly.

Sent to the time-out corner at least once a day.

In crutches for half of the school year, and he lets the other kids try them during morning tea.

Meeks

Breaks the "no hat, no play" rule in summer and gets really burnt.

Won the Epro8 engineering challenge with Pitts. Got decimated in the regional finals by a group of homeschooled kids.

Does the Weetbix TRYathlon every year and wears the shirt to mufti day without fail.

Loves Te Papa museum and MOTAT. He will spend six hours reading every single museum plaque.

Pitts

Waikato farm kid. He owns several Swandri jackets.

Likes banana fruit bursts, much to everyone else's horror and relief.

Got compared to Harold the Giraffe whenever the class had health sessions in the van.

Knows the names of all the native birds.

Collects cicada shells with Meeks at lunchtime. Charlie steals them to put on people's backs.

Always has scraped knees from playing outside.

Cameron

From Nelson.

Got locked in the PE shed, may or may not have been on purpose.

Milk monitor with Knox. He's very stressed.

Gets made fun of for being ranga.

Stole a PE shirt from lost property in Year 5 and never forgave himself.

Knox

Grew up in Wellington.

Spends a lot of time on the monkey bars.

REALLY likes Jump Jam, his favourite songs are Witch Doctor and Kung Fu Fighting.

Loves LeSnak. Eats one every day.

Attends every school disco.

THIS REACHED THE EXACT RIGHT AUDIENCE

(also how did i not know u were kiwi what??? i thought u were like british💔)

1. THE PEANUT BUTTER ONE IS SO REAL. I too upon visiting Nelson BEGGED to do a tour of the ppb factory (it was booked out while we were there so we couldnt💔)

2. I FUCKING LOVE TE PAPA THATS SO REAL it's actually peak

3. the liking banana fruit bursts "to everyone else's horror and relief" is such a funny way of putting it (cannot relate because ive been terrified of fruit bursts since one took a tooth out in like year 6 but) (also side note: are fruit bursts only a kiwi thing?? do other countries not have them???)

note: they're in Year 6/10-11 years old

Neil

Was born in West Auckland but moved to Remuera. His father told him to never tell anyone.

Attended speech and drama classes secretly until his father saw it on the tuition fees. (bro was MADDDDD)

Road patrol monitor. Feels very cool with his neon orange lollipop sign.

Really good at Lit Quiz, does it 3 years in a row. Meets Todd because the school librarian puts them in the same team.

Loves Pic's Peanut Butter, begged to go to PPB World when his family visited Nelson.

Todd

Grew up in Christchurch. Was more upset about leaving his favourite bench at the Botanic Gardens than he was about leaving the house. 

The family moved to Devonport for Jeffrey’s education and didn't really consider Todd's opinion because they assumed he didn't have friends 😭

Was very upset when Video Ezy closed down.

Never played rugby and did not GAF when the Crusaders won the Super Rugby championship in 2019.

Charlie

Popular because he's he fastest boy at cross country.

Puts the Yummy apple stickers on the back of people’s blazers.

Swallowed a plastic counting bear and other maths equipment.

Loses parts of his uniform constantly.

Sent to the time-out corner at least once a day.

In crutches for half of the school year, and he lets the other kids try them during morning tea.

Meeks

Breaks the "no hat, no play" rule in summer and gets really burnt.

Won the Epro8 engineering challenge with Pitts. Got decimated in the regional finals by a group of homeschooled kids.

Does the Weetbix TRYathlon every year and wears the shirt to mufti day without fail.

Loves Te Papa museum and MOTAT. He will spend six hours reading every single museum plaque.

Pitts

Waikato farm kid. He owns several Swandri jackets.

Likes banana fruit bursts, much to everyone else's horror and relief.

Got compared to Harold the Giraffe whenever the class had health sessions in the van.

Knows the names of all the native birds.

Collects cicada shells with Meeks at lunchtime. Charlie steals them to put on people's backs.

Always has scraped knees from playing outside.

Cameron

From Nelson.

Got locked in the PE shed, may or may not have been on purpose.

Milk monitor with Knox. He's very stressed.

Gets made fun of for being ranga.

Stole a PE shirt from lost property in Year 5 and never forgave himself.

Knox

Grew up in Wellington.

Spends a lot of time on the monkey bars.

REALLY likes Jump Jam, his favourite songs are Witch Doctor and Kung Fu Fighting.

Loves LeSnak. Eats one every day.

Attends every school disco.

pH balance in your mouth, and how it affects your teeth! Inspired by my dentist scolding me for my daily energi drink consumption, cause it’s apparently detrimental to the health of my enamel… whatever that means

me when im awkward and 16

"when were post-it notes invented"

"what did school graduation in the 1950s look like"

"when was this poem written"

"1950's vintage last names"

"when were washing machines invented"

"did people still use fountain pens in the 1950s"

note: they're in Year 6/10-11 years old

Neil

Was born in West Auckland but moved to Remuera. His father told him to never tell anyone.

Attended speech and drama classes secretly until his father saw it on the tuition fees. (bro was MADDDDD)

Road patrol monitor. Feels very cool with his neon orange lollipop sign.

Really good at Lit Quiz, does it 3 years in a row. Meets Todd because the school librarian puts them in the same team.

Loves Pic's Peanut Butter, begged to go to PPB World when his family visited Nelson.

Todd

Grew up in Christchurch. Was more upset about leaving his favourite bench at the Botanic Gardens than he was about leaving the house. 

The family moved to Devonport for Jeffrey’s education and didn't really consider Todd's opinion because they assumed he didn't have friends 😭

Was very upset when Video Ezy closed down.

Never played rugby and did not GAF when the Crusaders won the Super Rugby championship in 2019.

Charlie

Popular because he's he fastest boy at cross country.

Puts the Yummy apple stickers on the back of people’s blazers.

Swallowed a plastic counting bear and other maths equipment.

Loses parts of his uniform constantly.

Sent to the time-out corner at least once a day.

In crutches for half of the school year, and he lets the other kids try them during morning tea.

Meeks

Breaks the "no hat, no play" rule in summer and gets really burnt.

Won the Epro8 engineering challenge with Pitts. Got decimated in the regional finals by a group of homeschooled kids.

Does the Weetbix TRYathlon every year and wears the shirt to mufti day without fail.

Loves Te Papa museum and MOTAT. He will spend six hours reading every single museum plaque.

Pitts

Waikato farm kid. He owns several Swandri jackets.

Likes banana fruit bursts, much to everyone else's horror and relief.

Got compared to Harold the Giraffe whenever the class had health sessions in the van.

Knows the names of all the native birds.

Collects cicada shells with Meeks at lunchtime. Charlie steals them to put on people's backs.

Always has scraped knees from playing outside.

Cameron

From Nelson.

Got locked in the PE shed, may or may not have been on purpose.

Milk monitor with Knox. He's very stressed.

Gets made fun of for being ranga.

Stole a PE shirt from lost property in Year 5 and never forgave himself.

Knox

Grew up in Wellington.

Spends a lot of time on the monkey bars.

REALLY likes Jump Jam, his favourite songs are Witch Doctor and Kung Fu Fighting.

Loves LeSnak. Eats one every day.

Attends every school disco.