melancholy.

Flashes of you dance behind my eyelids.

How do you explain to someone

The space between friends and lovers

Where you’re not quite attached

But you’re no sisters either?

How do you explain to someone

Curiosity satisfied

by actions seen immoral

and still felt innocent?

Like children playing house

How do you explain this to someone

while holding their heart in your palms

staring at it with uncertainty

wondering if it will break

or stop beating for you

Am I selfish

for not wanting to give up this part of me?

For needing the confirmation of who I am—

Wholly, unnervingly, inexplicably me

Or should I have just spent the rest of my years

questioning, yearning, imagining, doubting

This unexplored side of me

Always dangling the question

in the back of my mind

The way I dangle my feet

on the edge of a mountain

after a laborious climb