Dreamy Kitten

It's also one of my biggest fears. Manipulated and gaslighted until I'm hopelessly enslaved, against my will and without me realizing it? Nightmare fuel.

On the other hand, the idea that someone would put that much effort into a long term brainwashing campaign specifically so they could have me the way they want me? Countless hours of planning, building trust, laying traps, implanted triggers, endless conditioning and priming -- what a beautifully colossal labor of love.

they are the palest shadow of consciousness, but all of it is in focus and in focus on you.

why is that so beautiful? Why is it so sexy?

there is no obvious answer, no really compelling one. If there was, we could explain ourselves to our non-EH kink companions and friends and they would understand. But we can't, and they don't.

I think there is something there about presence.

Almost all of the time, almost all people, myself included, are very busy performing some version of themselves. A professional version, a masculine version, a personal version, and so on. To think I'm saying that as any kind of criticism is to misunderstand. It is a necessary requirement of being a person. It's just what we do.

There are no contexts we can find someone not in this kind of performance, of one sort or another.

Trance, deep trance, is one.

I wonder if it's so fucking sexy because it's so inherently intimate. How rare, how precious it is to see someone not in performance, not in a performance of any kind of identity but simply present.

It might sound like a contradiction but it's not. That kind of distilled presence comes at the cost of absence. All the normal personas a person has, absent. How... remarkable, how stunning. Someone perfectly absent of all those personas, all those identities, they are almost absent even of their own body.

And in that absence, the hypnotist is given, gifted maybe, an eye-rolling pleasurable opportunity. They can do whatever they imagine with this personless person, this thing. This body.

The hypnotist is free to touch, grope, describe their wants, their fantasies, their desires, and there is nowhere from judgement to even come from. There is just silence where there would be noise, just acceptance where there would be objection.

To be able to do and say whatever one pleases at their most base lustful desires with someone who is present and absent enough to not be capable of anything other than acceptance.