earthling

Life sometimes is predictable. And predictably… there will be someone you’ll meet who will run a finger down the index of who you are and jump straight to the parts that pique their interest. Another will take his or her time reading through every one of your chapters and even fold corners of you that inspired them most. You WILL meet these two people: it is a given.

Yet it is the third that you’ll never see coming! That one person who will not only finish your sentences but will keep the book!

Flying back to you Through white cotton clouds Your soft lips await

Knowledge hurts. Experience hurts. The world will hurt you. People will hurt you.

Growing up is all about getting hurt. And then we get over it. You hurt. You recover. You move on. Since it is so cyclical, odds are pretty good you're just going to get hurt again. Yet each hurt makes you stronger and you learn something. By the time you are on your hundredth hurt, you realize that there are more flavors of pain than coffee.

There are the little pains of leaving things behind - graduating, taking the next step forward, walking out of something familiar and safe into the unknown. Then there are the big pains of life where sometimes your dreams, plans and expectations come crashing down. There are the sharp little pains of failure, and the more obscure aches of successes that didn't give you what you thought they would. There are the vicious, stabbing pains of hopes being torn up. Of course, there are the sweet little pains of finding others, giving them all of your unconditional love and realizing that they have left you. The major pain comes much later when you need to let go of the memories of the joys of togetherness. After all people do leave imprints in our souls.

There's the steady pain of empathy that you shrug off so you can stand beside a wounded friend and help them bear their burdens. And if you're very, very lucky, there are a very few blazing hot little pains you feel when you realized that you are standing in a moment of utter perfection, an instance of triumph, or happiness, or mirth which at the same time cannot possibly last - and yet will remain with you for life. The perfect moment, perfect yet fleeting. The pain of knowing that perfection cannot last. Everyone is down on pain, because they forget something important about it: Pain is for the living. The dead don't feel it. Pain is a part of life. Sometimes it's a big part, and sometimes it isn't, but either way, it's a part of the big puzzle, the deep music, the great game. Pain does two things: It teaches you, tells you that you're alive. Then it passes away and leaves you changed. It leaves you wiser, sometimes. Sometimes it leaves you stronger. And sometimes it tears you apart and leaves you dying on the side of the road. In every way, pain leaves its mark, and everything important that will ever happen to you in life is going to involve it in one degree or another. 

Would you take hold of my tears?

And collect them as rain

Put them in a bottle for all eternity

And mark it as ‘pain’

  Would you trace the path with your fingers?

Would you track them down the cheek?

Would you listen to the stories they say?

Stories that I am too scared to speak

  Would you stop them with your kisses?

Would you then blow them dry?

As you whisper in my ear,

“You’re too precious to cry.”

  I look deep into your eyes

And notice they are filled with tears

You are now sharing your pain

And your hidden fears

  I know you are teaching me a lesson

A lesson I could not learn on my own

That in pain we may feel lonely

She walks leaving a trail of blazing fire

Her soul obscured by her veil

Tears flow out and burn my soul

She is my Holy Grail

  I see her lips whispering a name

It is not my name I surmise

She stops she turns she looks at me

Life is a test. It was designed to be so. This is where we have to make our most difficult choices. This is where we pass through darkness and light; where we taste the bitter and the sweet; where we learn right from wrong; where we experience pain and pleasure; where we love and sometimes hate. Going through all these different emotions and experiences we become who we truly are; a human soul with a combination of qualities, a complex form with a mind that can imagine; thus creating our own realities. Sometimes we are grand and glorious, sometimes barely decent and other times plain monstrous. After all we are the saint and the savage, the angel and the devil. We are human beings. Yet as long as most of our true self remains a positive influence on people, most of our choices are the best we can make at that moment in time - we will achieve what we have set out to do.

  On a personal note, I have stopped comparing myself to others. It really doesn’t make sense. We are responding to the stimulus that life is throwing at us. Therefore our life is nothing but our unique response to the circumstances around us. J. K. Rowling through her character Professor Dumbledore tells us the ultimate truth:

  “It is our choices that show who we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

  Whatever I am going through at this very moment is a result of my progressive choices. Therefore I am making my own path. I am where I am now because of my choices. As soon as I am cognizant of that truth, I have already moved on. I have already made peace with the Universe, I have already told myself that I am responsible for my world. Does that mean I could have anything in this world? Can I make all my dreams come true? A lot of people believe that. Personally I don’t.

Our dreams are ours! That is a fact of life.

There is a magic and beauty to dreaming. There is more magic and beauty to dreams coming true. No matter how small, big or extravagant our dreams are, we all deserve them to come true. This is especially true when we have put in a lot of hard work to achieve them. Yet sometimes life goes astray from what we had planned and dreams shatter. We bleed from the broken pieces all around us. The worth we have for ourselves often dwindle and we die beside our dreams. 

Sometimes our dreams don’t come to pass, it’s just a simple fact! 

It is at this time when we need our greatest strength, our greatest commitment and our greatest composure to keep pushing forward. We all fall down. Yet as long as we get up we are not a failure. When we are constantly fighting for our dreams and realize that they are not meant to be, we still should have hope. We need to accept the present situation and move on from the past. Take whatever pieces are worth saving and join them to form a smaller dream. It will still have certain aspects of our grand dream. 

I know I’m not perfect and I don’t have to be –

But before you start pointing fingers…

As I grow older in years, I often wonder what do I need to do in order to grow as a human being. Sometimes there are challenges which are overwhelming. During those trying times, we tend to stop looking at the way forward. We may stop growing intentionally but time does not stop neither does age.

I was listening to John Maxwell and he talks about surrounding yourself with an environment of growth. 

What is an environment conducive to growth?

It is a place where others are ahead of me. If you're ahead of the class you are in the wrong class!

It is an environment where I am continually challenged.

It is an environment where everyone around you focuses forward.

It is a place where the atmosphere is affirming.

The people are always encouraging you.

It is a situation where I am completely out of my comfort zone.

I wake up excited to go to my work place.

It is a place where everyone believed that 'failure' is NOT my enemy. 

It is a place where others are growing