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it’s so hard to not feel at fault when we lose touch with those closest to us…

The idea for this comic was sent in by Jer, and we thought it was something a lot of you ghosties would identify with (because we sure did!).

If you have any words or ideas for a comic you can email us at [email protected] - be sure to put COMIC IDEAS as the subject line so we don’t lose your email :)

MOTHER, I HUNGER.

I never see this talked about and maybe it’s because I don’t follow people who talk about it.

What is it?

Emotional isolation is the feeling that you cannot confide in people, regardless of having a strong social network or not. It leads to a feeling of being separated from people around you. Like “feeling alone in a crowd”.

People who have no one in whom they can confide are less likely to feel alert and strong, calm, energetic and happy. Instead, they are more likely to feel depressed, sad, tired and worn out.

Source: Wikipedia

How does it happen?

Often times, it’s a result of emotional maltreatment/abuse during childhood but can also result from emotional trauma. Children who are raised as being “drama queens” any time they try to express emotions. Children who are advised to act “logically” or “responsibly” rather than based on emotion or assisted to accept their emotions. 

A 2 year study of United States army cases of emotional maltreatment by Jellen et al. (2001) revealed that primary emotional abuse was found in 26% of cases while emotional abuse plus physical abuse or child neglect was discovered in 14% cases.

How to Identify Emotional Abuse

5 Signs of Emotional Isolation

Do you ever…

Have a sense of feeling alone, despite having platonic and intimate relationships?

Feel no one understands you?

Avoid close relationships due to a fear of getting hurt?

Keep people at a distance because you don’t trust them?

Go through long periods of not interacting with others?

Learn more:

5 signs of emotional isolation by a listed counsellor/therapist

Goodtherapy

I didn’t know about it until talking to my new mental health agency. And like… it makes sense. On a personal note:

Phrases I often find my brain telling me when i want to talk to someone are things like “they don’t care” or “they’ll just call me emotional” or “Am I manipulating them by telling them how I feel? I don’t want someone to do something out of pity.”

These are formatted for standard business card printing, you can go through Moo or Vistaprint or whoever the hell you like. Sharpie in your own name and pronouns. 

Happy to take feedback and requests, but if you want your own professionally done set I reserve the right to charge for my time.

“You look like a winter night. I could sleep inside the cold of you.”

Catherynne M. Valente

So I wasn’t really taught to brush my teeth every day as a kid. So I didn’t. I got to be an adult and realized “hmm teeth are expensive I need to start brushing them” and brushing my teeth twice a day has been on my actual to do list every single day of my college career. It’s a habit I needed to build.

Have I successfully done it? Absolutely not. I’m pretty good about doing it at least once a day, but some days it just doesn’t happen. It’s not that I forget usually, I just had some aversion I couldn’t figure out, until last week.

I’m at the grocery store, in the toothpaste aisle with my roommate, and I complain about how much I hate mint. I FUCKING HATE THE TASTE OF MINT. The taste and the smell, any kind of minty thing in any form, I HATE IT. But literally every “adult” toothpaste in the aisle was some type of minty disgusting nonsense. And my roommate was like “you know you could like get kids’ toothpaste? You like bubblegum right?”

And y’all, it was like the clouds parted. I got some strawberry bubblegum kids’ toothpaste. I brushed my teeth with it and it was a whole new experience. I have successfully brushed twice a day every day since, because the mental block I had towards it is gone! 

I thought my lack of brushing was just a moral failing on my part; I was too lazy, too undisciplined, to build a good habit. But really? I just hate the taste of mint so much I didn’t want to brush my teeth.

This made me realize that when presented with a change you want to make, a habit you want to build, if you’re encountering resistance in yourself, you should lean into that resistance and really investigate what’s causing it, then work on accommodating that. 

Say you hate washing dishes so they pile up and then you’re overwhelmed by how many you have to do. Why do you hate it? Deep down, what about it do you dislike? Is touching wet food super gross for you? Try thick rubber gloves while you’re washing. Does the sound of dishing clanking together grate your nerves? Do them with headphones in and turned up loud. Do you hate the smell? Light some candles, spray some air freshener. 

Do these things instead of gritting your teeth and forcing yourself, then ultimately failing and getting discouraged by your “lack of self-discipline”

Alright, this is a chicken soup recipe, so there will be meat products being used. I figure I oughta give that disclaimer since I don’t know who may be vegetarian/vegan.

Now onto your ingredients: -Two boxes of store bought chicken broth -One white onion -Garlic (I use the pre-minced store garlic because a) it saves time and b) it’s much easier to infuse into the broth) -Celery -Carrots -Wide egg noodles -Chicken bouillon cubes -Salt -Pepper -Bone-in, skin-on chicken thighs.

Directions:

Get yourself a big ass soup pot, toss in your chicken, chicken broth and fill the rest of the way with water (you want your pot about ¾ full). Put it on high and vent your lid. Par boil your chicken until it begins trying to boil over then reduce heat to med-high and let simmer. This is where you get your rich, hearty stock from. The broth, fat from the skin and marrow from the bones do wonderful things together, let me tell you.

While this happens, dice your carrots and celery ahead of time and set them aside. Once your chicken is done (it’ll look kinda gray and yellow instead of white and pink), pluck it out of the pot into a large bowl. Move your pot off the heat so it doesn’t cook out your stock. One by one, move a thigh into a seperate bowl and proceed to shred your chicken. (Pro-tip, if you have a hand mixer or food processor, this process can go much faster as long as the bones are removed)

Next, put in your veggies and noodles with the shredded chicken. Next comes spices. Add pepper and salt to taste (you can always do a little at a time if you’re worried about going overboard) along with about 4-5 bouillon cubes. If you have minced garlic, add about 4 spoonfuls (the little spoons) into the broth. If you have whole cloves, smash em and mince the shit out of them, about 6 big ones, and toss them in.

Stir really well (I always stir both clockwise and counter to banish sickness and draw wellness). Set the pot back on the heat (remember, med-high) and let that sucker cook until the noodles are just at al-dente. You don’t want em too squishy and mushy. Take this time while the noodles cook to taste your broth repeatedly. You want to taste the all the components strongly without them being too overpowering. Basically, if it burns your throat pleasantly and makes your nose tickle, you got yourself a badass broth.

Once done, serve with fresh cracked pepper and a big ass glass of water or vitamin c rich juice. Remember to remove the pot from the heat even after it’s off so it doesn’t continue to cook out your broth and over-tenderize your noodles.

To store: let the soup cool completely and transfer to a big tupperware and refrigerate. Eat the rest within the next 2 days.