" okay, okay! i'm here, calm down! " she called to her boss as she wrapped her uniform's apron around her waist. picking up her notepad, she made her way over to the first table she had in her section. " hi, i'm evelyn, i'll be taking care of you today. would you like a moment to- " she looked at the customer in front of her and paused, her pen stopping mid-air. " celia? " she asked with pure shock in her voice as a smile crossed her face.

Was that [NICOLE KIDMAN]? Oh no no, that was just [SATINE], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [MOULIN ROUGE]. They are [THIRTY] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE NOT] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

Was that [ELIZABETH LAIL]? Oh no no, that was just [QUINN FABRAY], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [GLEE]. They are [TWENTY FOUR] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

Was that [ANA DE ARMAS]? Oh no no, that was just [EVELYN HUGO], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [THE SEVEN HUSBANDS OF EVELYN HUGO]. They are [TWENTY FIVE] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.