this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

You're failing.

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

also, odysseus isnt a god either

HES NOT A GOD EITHER?????

odysseus is just some fuckin guy yeah sorry to tell you. a goddess really likes him and a couple gods aren't big fans but he's just A Dude who got stuck on a really long journey.

The one thing men in the 1700s did right was have long hair they tie back into a low ponytail with a little ribbon and also have a few stray strands at the front. Almost everything else they did that century was inexcusable though

Explosive decompression

There’s no way this is the maximally efficient way to do this

Let’s be real. You like it because it is basically a popcorn shotgun.

I Am a simple man

sorry but the scene where eggman grabs his henchman by the inner mouth made me blush

on their clit like morse code

"S.O.S. we're going down"

fuck dont be funnier than me on my own post

... - . -. -.. . -.-.

She STEN on my DEC until I'm never heard from again.

idk who needs to hear this rn but suffering is not noble. take the tylenol

One time when I was younger I was refusing to take headache medicine and my mom said “the person who invented that medicine is probably so sad you won’t let them help you” and now every time I find myself denying medicine I just imagine the saddest scientist making those big wet eyes like “why won’t you let me help” and whoop then I take the medicine

One other thing: NSAIDS (ibuprofen, aspirin, and naproxen being the three big ones) can cause digestive issues with chronic use, including stomach ulcers. That doesn't mean "don't take them," it means "if you're at the point where you're on them all the time, every day, constantly, you should talk to a doctor about either reducing that risk or switching to another medication that doesn't have those side effects."

Also please please please consult your doctor if you are on any other type of medication that put large strains on your liver or kidneys before taking any kind of NSAIDs as they can recommend alternatives.

Yes Chronic Kidney Disease and liver disease prevent the use of NSAIDS entirely. Please remember this. Tylenol is the least harmful to these organs. If migraines are your problem, ask neurologist about the triptan drug family. Downside with these is nausea.

the universal college experience, no matter your major, is learning how remarkably fucked everything is. except business majors theyre having a great time learning to do basic arithmetic and and staring at that one supply and demand graph where the line goes up

judging men by the way they are with cats

Optometrists HATE me because when they ask me to look at the letters I just tell them No

Why

Read it yourself

Are you by chance dyslexic?

:(