sloppy seconds

In this world, the name of a person’s soulmate appears as a tattoo on their wrist the moment they are born.

The tattoos appear in the handwriting of the person and in blue ink. When a person is within 100 feet of their soulmate, the tattoo’s ink turns red. Another interesting twist is that if their soulmate starts to die the tattoo will begin to lose its color until ultimately it turns black when the person dies.

If their soulmate dies or is dying and they get pulled back from death’s grasp the tattoo will return back to blue or red, depending on if they have been near each other or not.

(Can you imagine watching your blue tattoo start to fade? Your soulmate is dying somewhere in the world and if they die then you’ll never get the chance to meet them!)

a list of hgtv inspired aus

“i’m a realtor and you’re a first time homebuyer and you’re so confused and excited about finally buying a house. i can totally see you in this one, you’d put your coffee table there and i’d put my bookshelf there and oh no i really really like you”

“i’m a realtor and you’re having a really difficult time selling your house and maybe i don’t need to constantly talk to you but i’m just being considerate and consoling, right?”

“we’ve been friends for a while and decided to start flipping houses together except now i’m imagining the two of us living here and sharing that bedroom and this is dangerous territory”

“i flip houses and you’re the contractor of a company that knocks out walls and you happen to be really cute so i keep hiring your company even though it’s the most expensive one by far”

“we’re coworkers at a really popular remodeling company and we’re the only two who know how to make the flooring look really nice so we work together all the time and wow you’re really cute and funny”

“i’m a worker at a home improvement company and you’re the homeowner who hired us to basically redo your entire house and you’re constantly asking me how to do things because you want to learn and you’re really adorable” 

“i’m a homeowner with no design skills so i hire an interior designer to help and wow you’re really attractive, i guess i’ll have to act even more indecisive than i am just so i can keep talking to you”

“i paint home interiors and have been hired to paint every single room in your house. at least you’re attractive. like, really attractive.”

“i install water features in yards and you, the homeowner, ask me in for lemonade and a snack every single time i take a breather and now i’m really tempted to take you up on your offer”

“i stopped by a future place of employment to meet the manager only to discover that i slept with them one time 6 months ago”

“wait what do you mean you’re still married?”

“we met only an hour ago and now we’re suddenly locked in the campground showers together.”

“i showed up to go on a date with you, but who’s your cuter friend over there?”

“i tried to tell my coworker that i want to lick your biceps but the whole restaurant ended up hearing it.”

“we got a little too horny at the park and a couple of fuckboys caught us.”

You died a year ago when I wasn’t there and I get to go back in time to live out your last day with you and you have no idea what’s going to happen to you in a few hours.

You and I were childhood best friends but you don’t remember me anymore and you’re trying to kill me.

We were a team of explorers and your younger sister died on an expedition after I left and you’re blaming me for letting her die and probably want to kill me now oh dear–

I had the prettiest voice you ever knew but I’ve gone mute and you’re getting really aggressive about it.

I had the most perfect wedding plans for the two of us and even though you’ve had terminal cancer for the last few months I’m telling you all about how everything’s going to play out as you die beside me.

So we really want to have kids and after a lot of trying and getting fed up we went to the doctor and found out that you can’t.

You were supposed to get hit with that right now, right? Sorry I kind of jumped in the way and took the hit in your place but I still want to hold yo ur hand– wait, why is mine all sticky and red? I didn’t bring jam on this trip honey this isn’t a funny prank.

“this airport is enormous and yet you keep ending up in line in front of me” au

“i’ve been sitting in the bathroom for half an hour playing sudoku on my phone and now you’re banging on the door despite the fact that the other stall is empty and i’m 80% sure you’re drunk” au

“out of all the space on the floor you decided to sit right next to me” au

“i instinctively pulled my backpack closer when you sat next to me and i think you got offended” au

“the walls between gates are transparent and you’ve been staring at me for an hour now but i think we’re flying to different countries” au

“you made a scene because they took away your carry-on luggage and i’m sweating nervously because my backpack is much larger and we both know it” au

“you’ve been standing in the regular queue despite your ticket clearly saying priority and i’m wondering if i should say something”

“you’re pissed off and having trouble communicating with the staff and by your accent i think we speak the same language” au

“i agitated my injured finger while putting on my backpack and you got worried by how inappropriately worded my reaction was” au

“we’ve been waiting for hours and you keep asking me to play something on my guitar that i had de-stringed for the flight” au

“you think i don’t speak your language but i can understand you talking shit with your friend and it’s hilarious” au

“you think i don’t speak your language but i can understand you talking shit about me and it’s much less hilarious” au

“i yelled at you for taking my seat but it turned out i read my ticket wrong and now we have to sit next to each other for the whole flight” au

“the intense focus with which you’re listening to the security briefing is honestly kinda stressing me out” au

“an old lady next to you keeps asking you awkward question and i’m in the seat behind you losing my shit” au

“you seem to have a very weak bladder but i have the aisle seat and the copious amounts of shit i am storing on the floor are not helping your situation” au

“we both sat down behind a screaming child and you keep giving me looks of empathy” au

“i keep touching the back of the seat in front of us and you think i’m crazy but in fact there is a tiny spider there and i’m trying to shield it from the ventilation so it can climb up” au

“you’re sitting in front of me watching my favourite show on your laptop” au

“someone keeps kicking my seat and i turned around thinking it was a kid but it was actually you” au

“you turned on your laptop right after take off and i saw all the porn you had open on it” au

“it’s an early morning flight and you’re copying all the sleeping poses i come up with” au

“you dropped your sim card while switching phones and now i’m helping you look for it”

“you keep asking me to let you leave but you don’t understand that i can’t do that with the aisle full off people and now you’re pushing me what the fuck” au

“my headphones got caught on your bag strap but you didn’t notice it so i’m desperately trying to unhook them as you advance to the exit” au

“i have no idea where my suitcase is and for some reason you think i can locate yours” au

“i found my suitcase and for some reason you think it’s yours” au

ROOMMATE AU

-okay you’re really scared of loud noises so whenever a thunderstorm comes around and i hear you whimpering trying to form a blanket burrito i cant help but cuddle you to my chest like the adorable thing you are.

-you’re super clumsy so now i pretty much follow you around everywhere to make sure you dont die. That would suck.

-So hey i hear the OITNB theme song and my Netflix account got cancelled so uh- you want to watch it together or what. NO WAY dude you love Poussey too? shes so adorable.

-Its finals week and we really need to get some sleep but you have the hiccups and i cant sleep cuz i find you too adorable so common time to test some remedies. Let the late night adventures begin.

“You’re in my art class and you’re really annoying me, and without thinking I just got a rolling pin and used it to mutilate your ‘still in process’ sculpture, and, no. I’m not even sorry” AU

“You’re a pizza delivery person, and I’m not very sober right now and I just tried to pay for all this pizza with weed” AU

“We’re at a concert, and you turned round and asked me a question but you’re really attractive and I’m panicking so I just answered it seventeen times in a row and now you’re laughing at me” AU

“I’m climbing a tree, you told me to be careful and I ignored you and hello I seem to have fallen and severely hurt myself.” AU

“You asked me for directions, and I gave you some - only to realise that they’re the wrong directions, so now I’m following after you in a panic, without realising I look very creepy” AU

“We’re at a play and I have the loudest laugh in the theatre, and you think I’m doing it to be obnoxious but I’m genuinely just really enjoying this play” AU

“You asked me if I’d heard of this band, and I said yes to impress you, but now you’re asking me questions and I honestly cant answer any of them.” AU 

“We live together and I’m furious so I slammed my bedroom door and the handle came off and now I’m stuck in my bedroom, and, hello? Are you still in the house? Could you help me?” AU

“My friends and I are in the park and your dog ate our picnic and I don’t even know what to do because your dog is adorable but I am so hungry” AU

“I’m looking after my little sister and she’s walking on the wall of your garden and you came out to shout at us" AU

“You’re my next door neighbour and, yes, I know this is the seventh time I’ve gotten locked out this week, but there’s a reason I gave you a spare key” AU