fading away @disorder-d - Tumblr Blog

how it feels having the deep seated belief that you're inherently unlovable and insufferable so every friendship you make is just a matter of time until they get tired of you and leave

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well that was. unpleasant.

#personal #vent

local-lesbian-tree-demon

i think there is something fundamentally wrong with me but that's okay

authorizedpope

everyone says 'prioritize your health' 'look after yourself' until they realize that making your wellbeing your first priority means making everything else a lower priority. and yeah, that's sometimes ok if it's temporary, but if those health issues are chronic? oh boy do they not like it when you actually take their advice. sometimes prioritizing your health means neglecting your work, your household chores, your social life. 'looking after yourself' means not putting your energy into looking after everyone else first. and the same people who tell you to prioritize your health will get upset with you when they realize it means you're no longer priorizing them.

if you have disabled or chronically ill people in your life and you extend them sympathy and tell them to look after themselves when they're feeling sick, but then you get upset at then because they keep canceling plans. please. reevaluate.

stealpeanutbutter

i feel like i do 25% of what an average person does in a day and still it's too much

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junglejim4322

Really bad habit I have to get rid of is feeling like I shouldn’t open a message until im going to reply but not opening it results in me having hundreds of message notifications and forgetting I got messaged for 6 months and then when I finally do open it i see something like “my entire house burned down and they poisoned all my horses and they’re trying me for witchcraft and I need your testimony by 7 pm tonight to save me” and I’m like uh oh

faustique

there's a special place in my heart for people who made an effort to be my friend regardless of how quiet or distant i can get at times

laumabina

nervous to see the doctor tomorrow, i know i can (hopefully) get back onto the med i was on before, but i really wish i could do something that wouldn't make me constantly tired i know that me being tired and sleeping a lot is easier for everyone else than me having seizures, but it fully fuckin sucks to sleep life away. especially when everyone else still wants you to make a normal life regardless

#personal #epilepsy #i feel like out of everyone ive told only one person actually cares about also my quality of life #but it's not like He can give me a treatment that works and makes me not feel like a zombie

shamebats

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

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rocknrollvoice

mentally-ill-loser-rants

the way I can go from.normal to suicidal is crazy

alliezweihander

"if you forgot then it obviously wasn't important to you" is an ableist thing to say and i'm tired of pretending it's not

alliezweihander

I've forgotten *my own birthday* before. There are several years of my life just straight up missing. In the past I've forgotten silly little frivolous things like NAMES OF LOVED ONES or WHERE MY HOUSE IS. But obviously none of that was important. Fucking awful, ableist thing to say.

#im with you op i have epilepsy and so much of my memory is just Gone

its kinda odd to be so near and yet so far from The Date, like i know pretty much exactly How it'll play out, but i dont really know how long i have with everyone

#everyone's kinda Planning the rest of their lives and im just sitting here like #i didnt think id even make it this far #even partner will eventually leave bc i dont want kids and they do #so eventually its just gonna be me #alone #personal #vent

capacity2

It’s actually crazy how bad feeling bad feels

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babymorte

i know they say no one is coming to save you but why the fuck not

justsayfkit

hey no worries lol that just hurt my feelings forever

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