Gays with Opinions™

people on this site will see a gay or gnc man and be like “oh my precious gay baby uwu, it’s our little q*eer icon, my little helpless gay son, my little baby, he’s so cute and innocent, too pure for this world uwu”

people on this site will be like “my gays, my gay son”

people on this site will see a gay/bi man be like “yes he said point blank that he’s attracted to men but he never used the words ‘gay’ or ‘homosexual’ so you’re being homophobic for daring to assume that someone like that is anything like you”

people on this site will see a gay/bi or gnc man and be like “have you considered that it’s actually really super homophobic to insinuate that this man might be anything other than cishet?”

people on this site will see a homophobic caricature and be like “what a gay icon!!!!! I think it’s really funny when he’s high and drunk all the time, we stan a disaster gay!! And that part where he enjoys being tied up, and says ‘daddy’, and gets horny is sooo funny!!! What a funny hilarious relatable disaster gay (he’s so hot!)!!!”

people on this site will see a homophobic caricature and be like “but it’s good representation, stop complaining!”

people on this site will see a fictional gay couple and be like “I ship it! ok so this one is super gentle and small and weak and cute and innocent and is the girl and can do no harm because he’s a precious little innocent baby bean uwu! and this other one is super aggressive and strong and big and manly and is the man and is kinda mean but it’s ok because he’s also super overprotective of his little itty bitty boyfriend and is also really horny XD. Anyway here’s my fanart with 100k notes, and as you can see: one of them is just a dainty little flower twink in a dress and the other is twice his size and a bara!!! I love my gays!”

people on this site will be like “twink is a slur, twink is a slur, twink is a slur, also [celebrity who isn’t in any way shape or form a twink] is a TWINK!!!1!!! XD”

people on this site will be like “anyway q*eerbaiting is really good and woke actually because there needs to be more male friendships, gay men already have enough attention representation they don’t need any more”

people on this site will be like “anyway q*eerbaiting is really good and woke actually because I don’t headcanon these characters as gay and would rather not see them as gay, gay men already have enough representation they don’t need any more stop complaining”

people on this site will be like “ANYWAY q*eerbaiting is really good and woke actually because why would you want to see them fuck on screen? why would you want to watch them be nasty and fuck on tv where my children might see it? and their relationship is so deep and emotional! gay men could never have a deep or emotional relationship nor a relationship that didn’t revolve around nasty gay sex and that’s why they can only be friends on screen, also gay men already have enough representation they don’t need any more STOP COMPLAINING”

people on this site will be like “if you hate the q slur and don’t want to be called the q slur you’re homophobic”

people on this site will be like “don’t call yourself a faggot, that’s homophobic”

radfems, about to let bi women down again:

This is brain weasels. Trauma gives you brain weasels. Living by your trauma brain’s rules is no way to live. This is why people who have trauma need help from mental health professionals. And of course it is awful that it happened to you (or your people) and of course you have coping mechanism that seem to have kept you safe. But it is no way to live. The trauma brain needs to be healed. The brain weasels need to be got rid of.

But instead trauma brain weasel thinking is spread online as jokes, or worse, as praxis. :(

If staying away from men is the best way for you to heal then do it! Leave us alone!

If you want to try and reintegrate men into your life though, remember that men aren't an acceptable recipient for your collateral damage. Don't enter relationships of any sort with men if you know you're going to have trouble treating them like human beings.

This means that if a man is talking about a woman that abused him, your trauma isn't a valid reason to play devil's advocate for his abuser on basis of her being a woman.

This means that if a man is upset and processing his anger in a healthy way, your trauma isn't a valid reason to shut him down and tell him that he shouldn't be allowed to feel anger, because his anger is inherently violent and abusive because he is a man.

This means that ND (specifically autistic, but other nuerodivergencies as well) men are allowed to miss social cues, get excited, accidentally infodump/interject in the middle of you speaking, realize their mistake, and apologize and try to do better in the future, and your trauma isn't a valid reason to lecture them or make fun of them on basis of how their ND symptoms/behavioral patterns are "actually" toxic masculinity, misogyny, or mansplaining.

You don't get to belittle, bully, mock, or tear apart the men in your life. You don't get to shame the bodies (including the genitals of) of men, not even cis men, and use your trauma of men shaming your body as a valid excuse.

If you want to try to be around men then cool! I'm glad that's part of your healing process! But please just leave us alone if the other options include emotionally (or otherwise) abusing men.

But actually when you’re questioning it’s really helpful to be able to ask some ‘stupid’ questions although you’re too afraid to

and, based on your standards, aren’t you being cissexist by assuming that every person you see identifies with the gender they present as?