Art and Stuff

my paintings.

sweet smelling lotions.

snorting laughs.

my music.

hugs that feel like warm sweaters.

my corny dad jokes.

chocolate chip cookies.

fuzzy socks.

dedication to mundane tasks.

paintings are personal.

writing relaxes.

talking.

sketch sometimes.

lists help.

light candles.

warm blankets.

anime can still hold your interest after all these years.

read everything.

learn to do what you love.

play sometimes.

breathe.

love everything shamelessly.

use more heart emojis.

drink water.

drink wine.

walk.

take photos.

look at elephants.

hope and dream.

make plans.

re-read things. 

relax.

routine is not boring.

laugh a bit.

do your best.

I am going towards happiness.

I am healing.

I am going to a place with less tears, less self-deprecating words, less fear.

or so I’ve been hoping

I’ve tried & ran back before, but now I have a merry band along with me.

This road was the less appealing option.

Because before I reach the end, I have to hurt more than ever. 

Trial and error.

I scream when I see shadows. I scream at my own reflection. Everything on this road is more terrifying than the lass, but this time I press forward.

The road seems endless. 

I have no idea how long it is, what my journey ahead is. 

I’m afraid I’ll never get to my destination.

I’m afraid every member of my merry band will disappear.

The thought is bitter and harsh, like biting into raw ginger.

But it’s just those fear mongers at the sides of the road trying to get to me. 

I never saw them before, but he showed them to me

This journey can be fun. Exciting. I can make it fun

We consume, we sing, we dance, we laugh, we add to our merry band. It makes it more bearable, fun even.

I look forward to these moments.

We climb into my old black truck. It makes the journey quicker, more familiar. Worth it in the end.

If I were to write the story of my life I would name it “Coffee”. 

Coffee is a bit bitter until you sweeten it. 

You can add things to it to suit it to your taste.

But at its core it is dark and bitter. 

Depending on what you add to it, you can make it more or less sweet.

You can make it lighter.

Sometimes even when you sweeten it, the bitterness creeps through.

But it is fluid, give people energy.

There are places dedicated to its cause.

People gather for the purpose of consuming it. It makes people kinder. Awakens them.

It gives you a break once in a while.

Some people don’t like it and that’s ok.