YOLO

Unknown (via hplyrikz)

Clear your mind here

Honestly, it’s a long story but here’s the condensed version.

On February 13th, 2012, I lost the best friend I’ve ever had. My cousin Mike, my closest friend since childhood, finally lost his battle to muscular dystrophy that morning. His heart gave out in the hospital bed, and I was the first person outside the room to know.

I had a really hard time. Because I met all of my closest friends through him, I had to be the one to call them each one-by-one and tell them the horrible news. During the wakes and the funeral I was the one going from person to person making sure everyone was taken care of, because my mother was so busy consoling my grieving aunt and my father was helping to take care of the business side of things. I wrote and delivered his eulogy at the funeral, and I was the last person standing at the grave where he was buried.

During all that time I never let myself break, and it completely destroyed me. I had a total emotional collapse. I went through an extended depressive fit and later that year had a near-suicidal incident.

Mike loved Supernatural. He loved that show and told me to watch, but I never did until after his death. I started watching the show and it made me think of him a lot, the way the Winchesters were a bunch of fuck-ups who still cared about each other even after they all made mistakes.

Every year on the 13th of February, I get a tattoo in Mike’s memory. So, I decided to get the anti-possession symbol that the two brothers had tattooed on them in the show. I’d been through a lot, and it never really seemed to go away, I just got better at handling it. I got better with fighting those things inside me.