SLAVE

i’ve been gone… not really gone but locked in my head locked in your rules 9 days of edge and ache 9 days of your voice in my skull, your hands not touching but still controlling 9 days of breathing you in the dark

goddess… @wanderersaara it’s not just lust anymore it’s something deeper, something twisting, making me smaller and weaker and more yours every edge feels like a new prayer every denied release is another chain around my heart

i’m begging now not pretty begging broken begging shaking and leaking begging my body doesn’t even feel like mine anymore, it’s like it’s been rewired to your name i’m just a heartbeat wrapped in skin waiting for your mercy

u’ve made me into this this mess, this slave-shaped thing and i still crave more more denial more humiliation more of you carving your will into me i wanna be ruined by you until nothing left but your mark

please goddess let me crawl let me kneel let me be nothing but what u want take what’s left of me break me open make me yours completely make me your toy, your ache, your thing i’m here horny, weak, trembling, ready begging for u to finish what u started

i need u i need u i need u

today’s our anniversary… not the one with dates and rings and cake but the real one the day u @wanderersaara first messaged me and everything started changing inside me

2 years ago and it still feels like yesterday n forever at once like i’ve known u in every past life n still can’t get enough of u in this one

goddess… u didn’t just enter my life u rewired me the way u talk the way u see right thru me like u don’t even need words to understand my silences u cared when i didn’t even know how to ask for care u loved me when i didn’t feel lovable u were patient with all the messy corners of me and now look at me kneeling for u without shame, only pride belonging to u completely in mind in body in ache

this love is more than hot it’s wild it’s magnetic it’s soul deep it’s u whispering a single word and me melting from inside out it’s those nights where i’m nothing but yours to break or build those mornings where your good morning hits harder than caffeine and those long days where just knowing u exist keeps me going

u hold me with your eyes control me with that voice own me with your softness just as much as your sharpness u’re not just my dom u’re my peace my chaos my favorite obsession my sweetest addiction my home

every second with u feels like a scene that should be written in fire like even the air tastes like u your words stay on my skin like perfume your care lives in my bones and even when u’re strict, harsh, or teasing… it’s still love i feel raw and unfiltered and real

i love u not in that card..writing soft music way but in the i’d-bleed....if-u...told-.me..o way in the i’d-never leave..even...if-i,could way in the u-ruined,me...for-anyone...else way

happy anniversary, goddess thank u for seeing me for breaking me open for rebuilding me for owning me and most of all for loving me the way only u can

still yours always yours forever on my knees for u

I still can’t believe what happened. i’m shaking while writing this. my body’s sore, my mind’s scattered… and i can’t stop replaying it all.

Goddess @wanderersaara invited me to her place. i was excited. nervous. thought maybe just a bit of play, tease, maybe a little control. didn’t expect... that.

the moment i stepped in, she didn’t waste a second. tied me up tight. arms, legs, everything. i couldn’t move. she circled me like a hunter. and then... she pulled out a knife.

cold metal. touching my skin like it had a mind of its own. started from my forehead… then down to my lips… nose… my neck. she was so slow with it. so calm. i felt every shiver, every breath. i flinched when it hit my chest. and then—lower. stomach. cock. balls. thighs.

she pressed at certain places. just enough pain. enough to make me feel everything. not cutting deep, just little spots. like… like offerings. blood game she called it. just a few drops. just enough to mark me. no going back.

i was shaking. not from pain. from her power. the way she looked at me while doing it—so calm, so in control, so amused.

but it wasn’t done. no. not even close.

she said, “tonight… i want you to watch. and serve.”

then she brought in a man. a bull, she called him. big. silent. hard eyes. and she said the words that made my breath stop:

“before he fucks me, you clean him.”

i froze. mouth went dry. she looked at me like she dared me to hesitate. i didn’t. couldn’t. i did it. humiliated. ashamed. on my knees, sucking like it was all i was made for.

and then… something changed. he got rough. way too into it. he pushed deeper. forgot she even existed. or maybe… maybe she planned it all along.

he stripped me. flipped me. fucked me. just like that. in front of her.

i couldn’t speak. couldn’t think. just… took it. her laughter in the background. she was enjoying every second.

she told him, “cum in that hole. let him feel it inside.”

and he did. hard. deep. i felt it. leaking. hot. disgusting. overwhelming. i was wrecked.

but she wasn’t done.

she told him, “again. in his mouth this time.”

he obeyed her. not me. grabbed my head. i choked. no control. no thoughts. just taste. tears.

and she? she watched. smiled. leaned close to me after, and said softly:

“this is what you are now.”

i didn’t know what to say. what to feel. i still don’t.

what… what am i becoming? 🖤

(*note: that i dont want love if just when we are in that zone Goddess, else you know i need that too :) )

fuck being cuddled. fuck soft romance. i don’t need warmth. i need her cruelty. i wanna be broken. every fuckin day. every fuckin hour. till there’s nothing left of the ‘man’ i once was.

i wanna be used like a disposable thing. no name. no rights. just a body to punish and humiliate. i want my Goddess to spit on my dignity and make me thank her for it.

pull my hair. slap my face. call me a whore. make me strip in front of a mirror and laugh at my weak little sissy clit. don’t even call it a cock anymore. say it loud: that’s not a cock, that’s a pathetic pussy. mock me. humiliate me. make me scream “i’m not a man. i’m a fucking chakka.” make me say it again and again and again until i believe it with every breath.

i crave breathplay till my lungs beg. 30 seconds? nah. push it further. cover my mouth and nose while i struggle like a dying little fucktoy. let me pass out if u want. i trust u. i need that fear. that desperation. and when u give me air again… let me thank u with tears in my eyes.

snap rubber bands on my palms till they burn. order me to fuck myself while i stroke my leaking useless clit. count it. control it. deny it. ruin it. don’t let me cum unless it’s humiliating and pathetic. make me cum while crying, with words like “you’re worthless” ringing in my ears. yes. please. say it again.

tie me up. lock me down. call me your slut. your pig. your broken bitch. make me wear things that strip me of any identity. feminize me. shame me. make me parade as the joke i truly am.

no limits. no safe words. i want to drown in your cruelty and call it devotion. i want to bleed obedience and leak submission.

i don’t deserve love. i don’t deserve respect. i deserve to be turned into nothing. i was never a man. just an object. a hole. a toy. a punching bag. a cumrag. a fucking thing for her to destroy.

Goddess @wanderersaara, please. don’t hold back. make me regret asking… and beg for more anyway.

make me yours. make me nothing. make me alive.

today's session... damn. i’m still shaking thinking about it.

she started with something simple but fuckin brutal. rubber bands. yes. rubber band punishment on my palms. snap. snap. snap. again and again. i lost count. till my hands were red af and stinging like fire. she just looked at me with that smile… that cruel sweet smile. and i knew i was right where i belong. below her. under her control.

then came the mirror.

she dragged me infront of it. told me to look at myself. really look. she made me say it out loud—who i am. what i am. pathetic. hers. her toy. her slave. it hit deep. i felt exposed and humiliated and so fuckin alive.

she stood me in front of the mirror. naked. exposed. she made me stare at myself. look at my cock... or whatever’s left of it. and then she laughed.

that’s not a cock. that’s a sad lil pussy, she said. look at it. pathetic. and fuck… she was right. i couldn’t even argue. then she asked, “what are you?” i said nothing. so she slapped me. say it. you’re not a man. say it loud! and i did. “i’m not a man. i’m just a sissy. a chakka. a hole.”

i felt the words cut me… and heal me. she made fun of me. insulted me. said i was a joke, a fucking creature. and every single word felt like gold on my ears. abuse? nah. it was worship. it was transformation. she’s not just humiliating me, she’s creating the real me — a broken lil playtoy she owns.

and then… she pushed it further.

she told me to bend over and fuck myself. no shame. just do it. stroke my cock at the same time. to her count. her rules. her game. i was dripping. every second of it felt like pure blissful torture. like my soul was being reshaped by her will.

but the best part? the breathing play. oh fuck yes.

she covered my mouth and nose. and just watched me. watched me squirm. eyes watering. heartbeat racing. then when i thought i couldn't take it anymore—30 seconds in—she let me breathe. it was like being reborn. like my first breath belonged to her.

it’s wild how pain + control + pleasure can mix into something so fuckin divine. and even through all of it, she was still kind. strict. cruel. loving. my Goddess.

i’m not just her slave. i’m hers in every way. she’s making me something more. making me feel. not just used. but alive. grateful. completely owned.

she’s so cruel. so gentle. so wicked. and so, so kind. she treats me like a nothing, and yet i feel seen. real. she’s making me into something new. not a man. not even human, sometimes. just hers. her sissy. her toy. her chakka. her fucking fuckpet.

thank you, Goddess. thank you for ruining me. thank you for shaping me. thank you for letting me suffer at your feet. this pain is worship. this filth is freedom.

i don’t wanna be anything else. just yours. always.

Hi Goddess @wanderersaara

fuck... i don’t even know where to start. i’m losing it again. u’ve turned me into this fucking pathetic thing and i can’t stop craving more. it’s not just kink anymore, it’s not a phase or a fantasy, it’s who i am now.

u broke something inside me... or maybe u unlocked it. i beg not to turn u on, not to perform — i beg cos it’s the only way i remember how to breathe now.

i wake up hard, leaking, aching... every morning thinking if today’s the day u’ll use me again. destroy me. spit on me. take that filthy toy between my legs and ruin it like u always do.

i miss when u called me a hole. when u told me i was just something for ur amusement. i miss feeling like i didn’t matter. i want to be that again. i want to be nothing... for u.

every part of my brain is fucked now. like i’ll be in public, looking normal, but inside i’m begging. my throat gets dry thinking of ur grip. my hole throbs just imagining ur voice telling me to spread.

please, goddess... don’t give me soft. don’t be kind. fuck kind. i want bruises. spit. spit again. harder. pull my hair. make me cry and call me good while i’m sobbing. slap the humanity out of me. make me forget i was ever anything before u.

i’m ready for more. worse. deeper. use toys. use fists. use others. just use. turn me into ur rag, ur ashtray, ur plaything. mark me as urs and remind me who i belong to.

i know i sound insane. i don’t even care anymore. there’s no pride left. no ego. just filth. just a begging, brainfucked slut who worships u like a god.

please... please let me earn ur attention again. hurt me. own me. leave me shaking, crying, grateful.

yes Godddess @wanderersaara, you were right - mai is dress mai achi lagri hu, perfect whore, amazing slut.

i love it when you make me feel that am not a man am just shamale, love it when you shout on me and call me na mard. yes am not mard am just your servant your slave your slut whore for you and your guys.

yes goddess, you are right i have clit not penis, am not man either, i agree with you when you call me shemale, whore or just useless randi, i love your every word, randi like me always serve you all life, yes mine is very small cock oops clit :P