Dante is a menace
A list of random headcanons but if the Zogratis siblings weren’t trying to end the world by logical means :)
Dante enjoys cooking but doesn’t know what the fuck he does and is shitty at it
Lucifero helps in the kitchen but also has no taste in anything whatsoever so he actually makes things worse
He uses gravity magic to flex while cooking
Everything is burnt or undercooked
Lucifero makes things gross and adds blood and death, just wants to eat children and not peasant food
Dante just laughs and makes hamburger helper badly
Adds wine for flavour, but pours the entire bottle
Zenon stays on the side, not interested in entering the mess of a kitchen and just casually roasts Dante and Lucifero’s cooking
Vanica lives for the chaos
Zenon is allergic to peanut butter but Dante puts some on anyways
Zenon just picks up fast food instead
Zenon like the Big Mac from McDonald’s, that exists
Finral works at the McD as the drive through guy, and he has the expression of someone who experienced hell and back 5 times during his 9-5 shift
Lucifero has NO taste in anything, food, fashion, love, smell, music etc.
Dante and Lucifero’s relationship are besties who bicker at each other
Dante has a YouTube cooking channel
Dante and Lucifero have a sibling dynamic
Lucifero often goes into his mini form and complain whenever Dante does anything and if Dante has enough, just grabs and yeets him behind
Dante goes gambling with Yami every Thursday or so and are banned in most casinos, mostly Dante but Yami soon follows
Dante could be in the middle of a fight or war, and would stop and ask Yami to go gambling with him, which most times he agrees and they only continue their fighting till the next day like nothing happened
Dante will spend hours at a casino, or until he gets booted out
Dante is surprisingly a lightweight when it comes to alcohol and will always go drinking when he loses a lot at the casino. Which is a lot
Dante likes to do the wildest shit to get Yami’s attention, like impersonating a stripper or crawling in the sewers and Yami not caring
The Zogratis siblings are just accepted by everyone as ‘that one weird cousin’ except it’s the entire of them being labelled as that
Dante likes organized crime dramas like the sopranos and wants to have that as his aesthetic but fumbles it completely
Dante tries to be a mastermind crime leader but he fucks up his own plans, which weren’t that good to begin with, and no one actually takes him seriously
Dante also can’t smoke for shit, he takes one puff and goes into a coughing fit
I might add on to this, I’m actually having so much fun and laughing at these scenarios lmao
