tea and tattle

“Moving on from you isn’t that easy if I can be honest. There are some days where I can completely be okay, but there are any other days which I will be sad and full of regret from what happens to us. It’s okay. I know that it’s not easy to move on. How do you move on from a relationship when you both love each other but apparently it’s not enough? You were such a good man to me, you were everything that I ever need, and my deepest regret is that I know I will never find another man like you.”

I’m tired, I’m so tired. I’m done trying to find you at the end of a cigarette or an empty beer bottle. Nothing feels the same as your lips touching mine or our hands intertwined.

In the end

“Trying to un-love you was trying to take a piece of me away from myself.”

There is a part of me that will always love you, no matter how much time has passed.

“I think I’m still holding onto you because there’s a part of me that aches to be who I was with you. You saved me, you shaped me and made who I am. You helped me so much. Maybe that’s why I can’t let you go, even after so long. I just don’t want to lose the change you made- I don’t want to lose myself again.

“The hardest part of moving on, is really letting go. I know you gotta find someone, but I don’t wanna know.

I miss being in love with you.

“I miss you caring about me. I miss you saying good morning and goodnight and hugging me when I’m sad and checking to make sure I get home safe. Now all we have is glances across the room and unsaid words in our minds. I guess I just miss knowing that I meant something to you.”

So here I am, stuck. Stuck between being afraid to love you and wanting to love you. You are the first person I’ve ever felt this way about and I know this is going to ruin me.

“Give your heart time to heal because loving when damaged is only gonna result in another heartbreak.”

There wasn’t yelling. There wasn’t fighting. There wasn’t “fuck you” and “I never loved you” and “I’m not going to miss you.”

“I think we were meant to be but we did it wrong.”

“The real goodbye is the one that happens slowly, over time, wordlessly. There is no ‘see you again.’ There are no future plans. You stop checking up on each other, and eventually you go back to being strangers.”

you deserve to be with someone who is as sure about you as you are about them

Sometimes I wonder what would it feel like to live with you forever.