hahaha. beat you to it @demoncore-whore - Tumblr Blog

.

#I know I’m just sad because I’m late and my brain literally can’t be normal past 12am #its*#but recognising and being self aware doesn’t stop me from feeling the way I do #anyway. I just wanna be held #I should sleep

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

.

#my hope and my hate #that’s all I have left

.

#I’m the entire way through a bottle of Shiraz. and I barely feel anything at all #god I wish I could fucking feel something

.

#damn this is a pretty steep hole huh.

.

#it used to be upcoming concerts. now I have none #it used to be planned holidays. now I have none #used to be hobbies and new music and food #and none of it seems to matter #thankgod I have bug. he is my last tether

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

.

#you know. the funniest thing about enduring abuse is that the entire time you’re under it #you can think of nothing else except (I have to get out)#so you don’t ever really plan for what happens when you do… get out from under it #so now. I’m free. I’m out #I still have all of the quirks of an abused and beaten dog #I still don’t know how to be myself in my home #I’m free. and yet. I’m still stuck there #I don’t know what the next step is now. I’m out. and I’m still not happy #almost nothing has changed #like I finally pushed my huge boulder to the top of the hill and I feel nothing #I am not free. and I will never be

.

#I think. I am going to admit myself

.

#i can’t even eat my lunch #I’m just sitting in my office crying #I just don’t want to fucking be here anymore. I want to go away #I want to stop fucking living

I wanna smash my own brains open . why can’t I just have normal fucking thoughts

shittttyproblems

i should isolate myself forever

#good point #< seconded

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

.

#everyday I wake up with more and more reasons on the Pro side of the page than the Cons #cons: I guess my sister will be sad #pros: I’m no longer walking this stupid fucking hellscape

.

#I keep dabbling on being vegan. I eat so many plant based meals already. I’d like to try at least 3 days a week to see how I go #I’m tired of contributing to a broken system #I’m tired of not being able to control how animal welfare protocols and practices are regulated #the whole fucking system is wrong #I need 2 chickens to keep in my home and maybe also a cool goat that will eat my grass #I’m tired of not being able to access ethical products #because when you look into it. it’s never what they advertised #and it’s all fucking corrupt

.

#i get so fucking triggered by anything to do with animals #it’s not even like I want to cry I want to hurt people for what they do #they should be held accountable #and when I say held accountable I don’t just mean slapped with a fine. I mean let me pour gasoline over their bodies and set them on fire #you are less than dirt to me. 0 contributions to nature. you are a dead weight. we should cut you off from the world #fucking vile

.

#I sleep. because if I don’t go to sleep I’m going to self harm #it’s ok because I’m tucked into bed. and away from everything #at least for 8 hours. until the loop of the noose tightens around my neck again #I told my psych that I’d reach out if the urges started coming back #and now I’m too scared to ask for her help again #because what do you mean when they come back? they have been with me since I was fourteen #anyway. I will sleep. and I’ll wake up and it’ll all be ok

ok so. can I hold out for 7-8 months? idk if I can

#I guess the prospect of knowing I’ve got a way out is good. like all I have to do is last just a little while longer #wish I was still living with my parents instead of trying to pay off a mortgage #but that’s ok #I’m strong and tough and persistent. I am made to endure #so I will endure. and the time will pass anyway #the time. Will pass anyway.

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

fuck that I can’t be sad ab shit if I’m not going to make active steps to help myself. reached out to an old coworker and she’s linked me up with a course that she did to get out of this shithole. it’s ok because I will persevere. I will make it out

I need something good to happen really soon. I’m staying to dig a hole and I’m scared I won’t be able to get back out again

Trending Blogs

Last Seen Blogs

hahaha. beat you to it