hello! hello america!

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury- be honest, are you mad? Like are you guys mad at me?

The last time I played Puck, the director was a huge freak about not letting us wear shoes on stage because it would “ruin the look”, but we all kept eating shit, and instead of just letting us wear skintone dance shoes or something with grip, motherfucker poured Pepsi on the floor so it’d be sticky and we had to schlorp around. I fucking hate you, David.

Why couldn’t this have been a one time I dreamt

I would just quit. Fuck people like that. It’s easy to walk away

No it’s not. Didn’t you read the post? There was dried Pepsi everywhere.

DOES ANYONE REMEMBER THIS SHOW???

OH MH GOD I HAVENT SEEN THIS IN FOREVER

just saw bindi irwin got engaged and apparently her fiance is american. she’s 21 and they’ve been dating for 6 years. I wonder if his family lives in aus/works in conservation because imagine just being a random 15-year-old tourist at the zoo and having a meet cute with steve irwin’s daughter lol 

apparently that’s exactly how they met. bindi just happened to be giving tours the day his family visited. love is unreal. how is this not a teen romcom yet

My favorite part of the story of how Steve and Terri met is that it was literally love at first sight. He saw her in a crowd and froze. Which was a bad thing, because he was sort of wrestling a crocodile at the time.

Aussie fairy tale

Well imagine it from Terri’s perspective. She sees a guy wrestling a whole-ass crocodile for funsies and just immediately goes “HIM”

There’s a saying that goes something like “If you attempt to understand God through His creation, you will soon be forced to conclude He has an inordinate fondness for beetles.”

“the average animal is a beetle” is so profound it opened my fourth eye WOW

buttcheek

I can’t believe, in an industry ripe with falsehoods, you managed to list everything that actually exists