Squeak.

"cigarette" implies the existence of a much larger "cigar"

i recovered by the time i hit post but when i first had this thought i had genuinely forgotten cigars exist

I am so sick and tired of having to charge stuff every day of my miserable life!! My phone, my watch, my headphones, my vibrator, my backup vibrator, my emergency vibrator, the ancient cursed amulet of darkness that whispers to me....it's too much!!!

waiting for my nails to dry affords me the perfect opportunity to do the dishes and organize my sandpaper and steel wool collection and synthesize acetone

Can I be honest with yall I don't want to hear SHIT against cishets at pride this year

"But it's not FOR them!!!" The biggest military power in the world belongs to a christofascist nation overseen by a felon found guilty of 34 federal crimes and has greenlit a gestapo with more direct funding than the entire military of Canada for the purpose of ethnic cleansing. Let Hetero Jessica throw some biodegradable glitter at a municipal parade

At this point if anyone is trying to exclude anyone benignly pro-queer from a pro-queer space I'm just going to assume you're a fed or something idk like something something destabilize the movement from within or whatever

Agreed, and also what the hell is is going to take for people to recognize that there are cishet queers? Intersex, asexual, and aromantic people are queer, it's exclusionary to be using cishet as a synonym for nonqueer.

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

i think they should allow everyone in the world to vote in american elections

YES LET US VOTE

My favorite banned terms on this site are "suicide prevention" and "safe sex"

Fuck nasty and kill yourself inmediately after

Salmon male grindset

I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.

"hear me out" and it's a picture of the most fuckable building you've ever seen. c'mon now.

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems