Daedric Darling

people will make jokes all the time about how middle school bullies can somehow zero in on your insecurities and accurately pick them out (ie the "how do mean 14 year olds know which slurs to call you?" tweet). fucking john mulaney even has a bit about it. but the moment you suggest that closeted trans girls don't get treated like cis boys during childhood or that closeted trans boys don't experience cis "girlhood" you get told you're insane

Moratorium on stories about the importance of stories! If I did not already think stories were worth my time I would not be spending said time reading! It's the literary equivalent of auto-fellatio, except instead of removing your ribs you've removed your capacity for shame.

If you want your book to be a "love letter to libraries" then write one that doesn't make this librarian suicidally bored

part of being an adult is figuring out what eveyone else's definition of "going crazy" is. to you it is not sleeping for 60 hours, writing 80k words in one sitting and expiriencing enough anxiety to kill a horse. to beth from accounting its buying a ticket to Columbus, Ohio. and to your friend its consuming so much ketamine you lose all of your posessions and wake up with five broken bones in a ditch somewhere and then proceeding to do it again the next day. to your other friend its writing a letter to their favourite actress about how much they appreciate her work. to your neighbour its laughing loudly in a grocery store whilst in pajamas. maya from uni hears the voice of her dead father making jokes with no punchlines and she considers that to be quite normal - to her going crazy would be hearing her husband instead. your downstairs neighbour will take night walks naked sometimes and claim there is nothing weird about him. there are literally no rules to life and all meaning is in the eye of the beholder.

Moratorium on stories about the importance of stories! If I did not already think stories were worth my time I would not be spending said time reading! It's the literary equivalent of auto-fellatio, except instead of removing your ribs you've removed your capacity for shame.

If you want your book to be a "love letter to libraries" then write one that doesn't make this librarian suicidally bored

They dumped plastic skeletons in environmentally protected areas, against the literal contracts they had to sign to get the permits to film in environmentally protected areas. Like they not only did a bad ecological thing that freaked out some divers, they literally broke environmental protection laws and their contract with the Italian government

The raccoons!! Are stealing!! My internet!!!

Every three hours it comes back, and pulling back on the cable does not discourage it. Raccoons turn out to be surprisingly strong for their size. I am no longer confident it will not eventually succeed

I won't lie to you bro, I think I'm being bullied by raccoons

the club moss I got for my terrarium is dying, despite being lovingly packed into organic soil with oven-fried leaf litter and bioactive springtails and isopods, and meanwhile in my fridge my fuck ass onions are sending out bright green shoots as happy as could be in their cold dark box of fucking nothing

As dandelions to sidewalks, so onions to refrigerators.

hello 👋 i am the worlds smallest bug 🐛 and ☝️ i too would like to “fag it up” if i may

That's because this is Silmarillion