Idk if this has been (haha I'm so funny please let me hide from the police in your house) your experience in fandom too but I usually see that people can't handle gender fuckery avobe putting a man in a dress, like I see most people stuck on a binary of "character is either femenine or masculine" and rarely I see anyone explore genderqueerness or even just aknowlege that characters can have both typically masculine and femenine traits even when it's just outright canon
Which on a purely personal note has always surprised me bc I don't ever think about that so I need to go see other's people's opinion to know which behaviours of characters are considered to be masculine or femenine
My experience in fandom prior to Hazbin was primarily Transformers, and I rarely felt a need to think about gender expression with giant alien robots (though a lot of people do like drawing the robots in dresses, and I never understood that). So coming into this fandom was very... Wait, do we care about gender here? Is that a thing we care about? I don't care about that, so I'm just gonna not, actually.
And then I saw everyone arguing that Vox has fragile/toxic masculinity and you know what, apathy cancelled, this is war.
That said, I've seen quite a few fics where people explore gender stuff with Vox. I've seen trans takes, genderfluid takes, takes not otherwise specified. And every. Single. Time. He is uncomfortable with feminine things, uncomfortable wanting feminine things, and stressing over his perception of himself as a man. Which is a common experience, and a valid approach to stories that have gender identity as a theme.
But uh. It is. Always binary. It is always man or woman. No in between. Not both. Not neither. One or the other.
Also, I can get the masculine insecurity from literally any other fic that puts Vox in contact with feminine things, so the gender focused ones end up feeling like more of the same unless he's like, actually in a dress or something. And then it's like his entire personality changes.
So I'm over here with my collection of screenshots. Replaying scenes over and over for the sole purpose of watching his hands, or the way he holds himself when he walks, or the positions he tends to settle in when he's not moving. Inundating myself in his particular brand of gender fuckery. Which, I would like to add, I picked up on within a couple weeks of first watching the show. He's been genderqueer to me pretty much from the start.
And then I read one of these fics, whether it explores gender or not, and I see him react negatively to anything that "undermines" his masculinity. And suddenly I'm experiencing second-hand dysphoria, because that's like. I literally forget people see him that way. And then it crops up and I'm hit with the same full-body Ick that I get when people use the wrong honorifics for me (pronouns? Don't care. Honorifics? The Ick).
Like. It's not a "this headcanon doesn't match mine and I'm annoyed" thing. Because I know most people actually interpret it as canon. But I also get the same thing with fics that do explore gender, because it's literally just the same thing on the opposite end of the binary. With the bonus frustration of genderfluidity =/= personality change. Why does this feel like two different characters in one body. And why is it always about clothes. Why does the dysphoria never work the other way, and the more feminine days aren't accompanied by discomfort with male sex traits? I know not everyone experiences dysphoria that way, but I have literally never seen it come up.
Also, when it is about clothes, why is it never, "okay, definitely not a woman, just likes feminine clothing". Because uh. Val is right there. No one has trouble with him being a man who happens to like dresses. Why does the struggle with feminine things always have to be linked to actual gender identity.
I'm just like. I love the dichotomy. I love how completely out of place Vox looks hanging out in Velvette's room, and how perfectly at ease he is there. I love watching this man in a full suit adopting mannerisms that would be deemed feminine/stereotypically gay, in public, and just not thinking about it. I love that he mixes masculine and feminine clothing instead of needing to be completely one or the other, even if it's mostly just the shoes (though one could argue that the shirt he's wearing in the bar flashback is kind of gender-ambiguous). I love that he's perfectly comfortable imitating a woman's voice and features, and that he just goes along with Velvette treating him like one of the girls.
And there is not a single fic I have so far found that writes him like this, even when it's explicitly about gender. So I am left to grumble and pull up my WIPs and continue to give him feminine traits and behaviors without ever giving them a single word of attention unless it's from someone else's POV. Because he's sure not thinking about it.