an aesthetic trash can

I say I'm here

And that I’ll stay

But you never know.

That's the thing about me honey,

I’m great with fake assurances

I’ll make you feel loved

Care for you more than I could ever show

We’ll share the memories

highs and lows

I’ll creep in your shell

You’ll get addicted to me

I’ll know your darkest secrets

And then I’ll leave.

And you’ll never know where I went

You’ll never know what happened to me

Am I alive or am I dead

Or was it an emergency?

You’ll break probably

And yes I will be to blame

You’ll think I’m a monster

And that for me, this was all a game

But you’ll never know my guilt

of  leaving you like this

You’ll never know what I did.

You’ll never know the weight my heart bears

You’ll never know of my tears

I hope you don’t think I’m a fucked up narcissist

I hope you never find

that you’re only one in many

of a never ending list.

(posted by @dancesatdawn

Sksksk THANK YOU SO MUCH

When I show you my truest self

Will you look at me the same?

Would you be afraid

When I reveal my darkest secrets?

Honey, will you try to fix me?

Like all those before you

Or will you accept me for myself?

What will you do love

When I come out of the shadows?

(Written by @dancesatdawn

I love how even after all the light pollution, given how far it is from me,  i can still see the craters and soft outline of its shadowed part. I love how it brightens the night sky, with its soft yet strong glow. i love how its light chases away demons, the ones in mythology and the ones in my head. i love that it is nothing, just a rock floating in space, orbiting another rock and yet how it is everything to me. and to you. i love how it shows up at my window each night no matter the rains, the clouds, the fog. how it is probably the only constant thing in my life. my companion, my confidant, i love how it patiently listens to my sorrow and complaints and l love how it is the only thing that calms me down when no one else can. 

I love how it reminds me of kanha. I imagine his skin glowing in the moonlight while we sway on a jhoola near the jamuna tat. I love how it makes me feel. I love how it ignites this urge within me. The urge to go wild, to run free, to never stop, to fall in love.

The omnipresent headache

Dark circles under my eyes

I've kind of lost my appetite.

Neck hurts a bit

I havent slept in a while

Concentration is hard 

Am i killing myself?