Dan said these things. @dan-quotes - Tumblr Blog

Dan: This is literally a vision quest.

(He woke up and couldn't find his glasses.)

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Dan: If Bob Dylan put out a Hanukkah album, I'd drop 20 bucks on that shit.

Me: I haven't updated dan-quotes in months.

Dan: No wonder the porn blog stopped following us!

Dan: I talked with the cat a lot about movies. I asked him about cat-themed movies.

Dan: He doesn't like Puss in Boots, but he does like Cats vs. Dogs. However, he finds the depiction of cats in Cats vs. Dogs problematic because they are not VILLAINS.

#cats

Dan: They're [eggs] the strongest. They're like the turtles of food!

#eggs

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Dan: It tasted like... Imagine if Tylenol somehow went bad.

#dan took five-hour energy #five-hour energy #energy drinks

Dan: I just don't necessarily want my ass shown to people. It's a very private thing.

#ass #dan's ass #asses are private

Dan: [My login picture] used to be my face. But then I realized Luigi is my face

Dan: I feel like Luigi is more of my face than my face.

#dan is luigi

Dan: I have an ice cream for every emotion.

#dan and ice cream

Dan: We can all learn a little from the Spice Girls.

#spice girls #we just watched spice world

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Dan: NOBODY CAN BE NAKED IN THIS HOUSE.

#nobody can be naked in our house

Dan: It took me so long to get my ass clean.

#we used to have half-ply toilet paper

Dan: *groan* I gotta take a pee!

Billy: So pee before we leave.

Dan: Oh, I'm doing that. I'm just announcing it. The WORLD has to know. That I need to PEE.

#dan is peeing

Dan: Everybody has a favorite Abba song; they just don't know it!

#abba

Dan: I feel free. I feel like Genie at the end of Aladdin.

#dan is quitting argus

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Dan: Billy, how can I find love when I am love?

#dan is love #dan is life

Dan: I don't have any "sexy" underwear because all of my underwear is sexy.

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Dan said these things.