Beinclarity

Which one comes first - happiness or success? Unfortunately, there really isn’t a straightforward answer to this question. We have been moulded into a culture that makes us assume that happiness and success cannot happen simultaneously and one must come first before the other but is that accurate?

Take a look at hustle culture. Hustling makes us believe that in order to be successful, you must leave behind the pleasures of life that distract you from your work. Also, think about what you’ve believed since you were a child. We’ve grown up thinking that if we have a good education and we study hard to land a respectable job that gives us success and wealth, we will eventually achieve happiness. These ideas have told us that we can only choose one or the other or it’s a sequential progression where one must come first before the other.

However, things are getting interesting ever since the pandemic because we’re seeing a shift in people’s priorities and this is apparent from the Great Resignation. Instead of wealth, money and success, our society is prioritising a better quality of life through work-life balance. People are quitting their jobs because their work environment is not prioritising their well-being. On average, every 8 in 10 Singaporeans believe that physical health and mental health are both equally important for their well-being, which hustle culture tends to neglect. So maybe success is not the answer to happiness after all?

In all honesty, happiness and success are not black and white - they are nuanced concepts. What if happiness and success are closely linked and not just two separate ideas? Let’s take a deep dive into understanding the two and how you can take the steps to achieve personal excellence through both happiness and success.

Defining Happiness

While happiness is complicated to define, you can describe it as a subjective positive emotional state of an individual. What makes each of us happy is also a very personal and subjective discussion but psychology splits happiness into two scopes: ‘Hedonic Happiness’ and ‘Eudaimonic Happiness’.

Hedonic happiness is about maximising pleasure and enjoyment while avoiding negative experiences or emotions like anger, sadness and stress. For example, some may turn to purchasing material items, socialising with friends or going on a vacation to increase their happiness. A hedonic approach to happiness focuses on having fun and leaves out boring or painful tasks. However, some may argue that hedonic happiness is not successful in improving one’s well-being as these pleasures can lead to detrimental circumstances like alcohol or drug abuse. Hedonic happiness is able to give fleeting pleasures but could also lead to consequences that decrease your overall well-being.

While hedonic happiness can achieve momentary pleasure, eudaimonic happiness focuses on long-term well-being and refers to the pursuit of self-fulfilment and the realisation of your full potential. To achieve eudaimonic happiness, you have to find meaning and purpose in what you do whether it’s at your job or volunteering to help others. When you live according to your virtues, it’s argued to maximise your well-being in the long run.

The idea that work or success is linked to our happiness and well-being comes from the eudaimonic concept of happiness. Research shows that work and effort are fundamental to eudaimonic happiness and the pride you feel in accomplishing goals adds to it. Though hedonic happiness is critical for mental and physical health, studies show that too much leisure can do more harm than good. A recent study showed that an individual’s subjective well-being begins to drop if they have free time of more than 5 hours in a day.

While research has found that most people prefer a lifestyle guided by hedonic happiness, many also agree that both types of happiness are needed to improve your well-being as they tap into different areas of positive emotions.

 Linking Success and Happiness

Is success the reason for your happiness or are you succeeding because you are happy? Psychologists have been pursuing this question for a long time and have discovered a counterintuitive link between the two.

Paul Lester, associate professor of management at the Naval Postgraduate School said “High negative feelings interfere with good performance, and high optimism predicts greater odds of superior work performance.” He also added, “Happiness could give you a greater chance of being successful. Skills, knowledge, ability—all of that matters greatly. And we’re not saying that happiness is more important than all of those other things. We are showing that happiness is a measurable predictor of performance.”

These research findings show that happiness does impact success. While studies have shown that people who were considered unhappy also earned rewards for their performance, their achievement rate was less compared to those who were happy.

Moreover, positive psychologist Michelle Gielan and researcher Shawn Achor also found that optimists are more likely to be promoted the following year compared to their peers. They are six times more engaged and motivated in their work and five times less likely to experience burnout.

When happiness is the cause of success in the workplace and in our everyday lives, it’s time to start focusing on our well-being. As leaders, we need to prioritise psychological safety in the workplace for our team to thrive, feel fulfilled and reach success. In our day-to-day lives, we can also take steps to improve our well-being, which can boost our overall happiness.

INSIDER INFO: Our EQ for Team Excellence workshop teaches leaders to create a safe environment for functional and high performing teams. The course taps into your values to build aligned objectives and motivated members that add value to meetings and discussions.

 Martin Seligman’s well-being theory of PERMA

Known for his theories of positive psychology and well-being, Martin Seligman has dissolved the term happiness into more workable terms. According to him, happiness has a core deeper than what appears on the front. The focus should not be on achieving happiness but on overall well-being.

There are five building blocks that increase well-being denoted by the mnemonic PERMA.

●     Positive Emotions

●     Engagement

●     Relationships

●     Meaning

●     Accomplishment

Increasing Positive Emotions: Described earlier as the hedonic concept of happiness, this route of well-being is about increasing positive emotions. Some ways to increase positive emotions are to spend time with your friends or even take up a hobby that you like. However, there is a limit to which a person can experience positive emotions and thus this way of achieving well-being has some constraints.

Engaging in something you love: Engagement requires you to put your strengths and attention into one single task. This produces the idea of “flow” where you do an activity because you find joy in it and not for a reward. You can experience “flow” if your skills are effectively used for a challenging activity and when you’re engaging in this activity, you are fully absorbed in the moment and self-awareness disappears. There are many activities that can make you fully engaged depending on your interests and skills. Some examples are reading a book, gardening or even just having an engaging conversation with someone.

Relationships with others: It’s no doubt that humans are social beings and we tend to rely on others for love and support. Well-being is amplified through our relationships whether you’re laughing with your friends or sharing your successes with your partner. Isolating yourself can be detrimental and creates a decline in mental and emotional health. Building connections with others can also give you meaning and purpose in life. You can build relationships by showing kindness to your friends or even just getting in touch with people you haven’t spoken to in a while.

Deeper Meaning of life: You hear about people searching for their meaning in life and this purpose usually goes beyond serving yourself and instead, works towards something that is bigger than the self. Having a purpose can ground you and motivate you to push through challenging times. You can find meaning in different aspects such as your profession, fighting for social causes or even spiritual beliefs. While it may take some time for you to discover your personal purpose in life, it is reported that those that live their lives with meaning have greater life satisfaction and lesser health issues.

Accomplishments & achievements: You may feel a sense of accomplishment when you reach your goals and this improves your well-being because you’re proud of yourself for the hard work you’ve put in. While accomplishment does require perseverance and passion, improving your well-being includes working towards your goals for personal excellence and growth instead of superficial reasons like monetary rewards.

INSIDER INFO: flowprofiler® covers different dimensions of assessments including motivation and resilience to help you maintain a positive mindset and feel energised by purpose.

 “The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.” ~ Marcus Aurelius

 The Negativity Bias

You’ve learnt ways to improve happiness and well-being but what if you find a tiny voice in your head that focuses on the negatives instead of allowing you to enjoy your happiness? This is called the negative bias where our brains are always on the lookout for threats, which also builds a wall against positive thinking and happiness. When you’re constantly thinking about what could go wrong, it builds stress and anxiety, lowering your mental and emotional well-being. A solution to the negative bias is building an optimistic mindset that can destroy the pessimistic thoughts that are clouding your happiness.

How can you achieve optimistic thinking?

Some may regard optimism as being idealistic but that can lead to toxic positivity. Instead, optimistic thinking is about being rational yet positive. Here are some ways you can adopt rational optimism whenever you feel doubtful about your happiness.

Count gratitudes: We’re all thankful for certain things in our lives but we seldom pay attention to them. We can get so focused on our negative emotions that we forget about the positives of life. Every time you feel things are going south, sit and reflect on the moments you are thankful for. Make it a habit by writing down what you’re grateful for every day. This may help distract you from any negative thoughts if you remind yourself of everything you are grateful for.

Relive good memories: If you’re ever feeling down, think about the good times when you were at your happiest. You can also make it a daily habit to note down the most positive experience of each day. By allowing your brain to relive these positive memories, you’re remembering the meaningful moments of life that can trump the negative ones.

Be social: Social support is a major predictor of long term levels of happiness that we experience. In Martin Seligman’s theory of PERMA, we saw how relationships affect our well-being. Activating social networks reminds our brains about people who care for us and love us. You can incorporate this into your daily routine by thanking and praising one loved one per day.

Break the tension at work: The best way to relax under pressure is to focus on your past successes. These successes make you feel more confident and relaxed in challenging work situations you find yourself in.

 Thanks to the pandemic, some of us have been rudely awakened to the reality of working towards success without balance. While success is important to many, the studies we’ve discussed have shown that happiness is a precursor to success. Instead of thinking of them as mutually exclusive subjects, we have to understand that happiness and success are ideas that work hand in hand. Our lives are not placed so neatly into boxes of personal and professional development. The two intermingle so you can start by improving happiness in personal ways to boost your professional success!

 References:

https://www.inverse.com/mind-body/link-between-happiness-success

https://www.todayonline.com/commentary/seeking-work-life-balance-do-you-actually-understand-what-makes-you-happy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0LbwEVnfJA

https://www.ipsos.com/en-sg/singaporeans-say-mental-health-and-physical-health-are-equally-important

https://digest.bps.org.uk/2022/03/04/having-a-sense-of-meaning-is-less-important-for-your-happiness-if-youre-rich/

https://www.fastcompany.com/90731186/which-comes-first-happiness-or-success?partner=feedburner&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=feedburner+fastcompany&utm_content=feedburner&cid=eem524:524:s00:03/22/2022_fc&utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=Compass&utm_campaign=eem524:524:s00:03/22/2022_fc

The past two years have completely changed the way we live and we’ve been pushed to adapt to a new dynamic in the workplace. We’ve moved from face-to-face board meetings to Zoom and video conferencing applications as well as from an office environment to remote working. These sudden changes have affected our social relationships with our team and co-workers and the lack of in-person interaction can create friction in trust.

It is hard to connect with a team, especially when a heavily technological environment creates a barrier to building trust in a virtual setting. Leaders also fear a lack of productivity in their team and generally struggle to adapt to motivating their members for optimal performance and collaboration. Leaders that haven’t been able to update and develop leadership skills in a remote setting are probably feeling more distant than ever.

As we’re moving back to the office or hybrid working, certain members of your team may not be too keen on leaving behind their remote working setting or some may be lacking motivation due to COVID fatigue. If you’re hoping to improve and revamp the psychological safety of the workplace despite the new circumstances, it all boils down to trust, not control. However, building trust when you haven’t had that in-person connection for a while can be tough.

The Recovery Phase

The latest easing of restrictions in Singapore finally means that we’re recovering from the pandemic. However, COVID has shaken up our entire world by inventing new ways of working, updating social dynamics and making us rethink our priorities. It is impossible to return to exactly how things were before the pandemic as our society has completely shifted culturally. As leaders, you have to tap into your emotional intelligence to learn to adapt to unpredictability and the new needs of your team members. In this recovery phase, it’s important for leaders to learn resilience and be open to change.

Recovery by trust

So how exactly can you make your team feel comfortable during this recovery and transitional phase? Yes, trust. Research shows that building trust brings along several positive outcomes in the workplace. Trust between co-workers helps them respond to crises in better ways. Trust is also linked to improved economic growth, increased innovation, better stability and good health outcomes.

Recovery during a pandemic is a human experience and human experiences require human connections. Take a look at how these two attributes of trust can work in a recovery dynamic.

Trust is a tangible exchange of value

Trust holds no significance in remoteness, rather it represents value only in interaction with others, be it stakeholders, customers, employees or team members. Similarly, trust only develops in real relationships of genuine give and take dynamics that provide equal value to both parties. When trust is invested wisely and thoughtfully, it flourishes but when invested poorly, it loses its value.

Trust is actionable and human along its multiple dimensions

Trust begins at the human, interpersonal level. It is multidimensional and in order to shift to the mindset of recovery, it is crucial to have an understanding of the four dimensions that build trust:

●     Physical: Trusting that your physical space is safe.

●     Emotional: Trusting that you are in a safe emotional space where your well-being is being safeguarded.

●     Digital: Trusting that your information is secure.

●     Financial: Trusting that your financial needs are being taken care of.

As author Stephen Covey conveyed perfectly, “Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”

The Elements of Trust

As a leader, you want your team to trust you. Building trust or earning it again once lost is extremely challenging. According to the data from 360 assessments of 87000 leaders by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, three main elements were identified as the foundation of trust. Understanding these three elements can create clarity on the next steps to building trust in teams.

Positive Relationships

Trust is partly based on your ability to create positive relationships with those around you. As a leader, you can instil trust by staying connected with your team members. Show care by asking them how they are doing and making them feel comfortable with you so that they don’t hesitate from sharing their concerns or issues in the workplace. Rather than criticising, opt for providing honest feedback that encourages improvement.

Expertise

A great leader has a good balance of emotional intelligence and technical skills. Knowledge and expertise in a field are usually required from a leader and it is this acquired experience that makes you more respectable and trustworthy to lead. Making wise decisions based on your expert opinions shows that you have good judgement and can be trusted as a leader, especially when your decisions create results.

Walk the talk

A team is more likely to trust their leader when they keep to their word instead of over-promising. As leaders, you may sometimes want to please your team without truly understanding the extent of your promises. Unfortunately, empty promises can disrupt the trust and respect a team has for their leader. If you’re ever unsure or doubtful, it’s best to be transparent with your team and tell them the truth. Your team will appreciate your honesty and openness in showing vulnerability as a leader. However, if you make a promise to your team, stick to it and show that you are willing to go the extra mile for your members.

 “The people when rightfully and fully trusted will return the trust.” ~ Abraham Lincoln

 The Three Magic Words

By now, we’re sure you know the importance of building trust in the workplace but what are some application tips that can be used on a day-to-day basis? Trust can be gained through clear communication and using the right words when speaking with your team can make them feel heard. When a team feels that their leader cares about their opinions, they are more likely to trust them. Here are some simple 3-word phrases to keep in your communication bible when building trust in teams.

That makes sense

This phrase is an excellent intimacy builder. It is a genuine expression of empathy that does not mean ‘I agree’ but it comes as a polite way of understanding someone else’s viewpoint and considering it rather than outrightly rejecting their opinions. Outright rejection may make your members apprehensive about sharing any other ideas in the future, resulting in losing trust in their leader. Using positive language when giving feedback boosts motivation in your team to improve their learning and development.

When you don’t agree with your team member on a proposal, instead of saying ‘I don’t think so’, you can frame your sentence differently: ‘I see that you’re concerned about the expected ROI based on our budget. That makes sense. However, I believe we will be able to brainstorm low-cost ideas together to tackle this challenge’.

I don’t know

As a leader, you may feel like you’re expected to know all the answers. After all, leaders are primarily chosen based on their years of experience and expertise. In reality, leaders don’t have all the answers and we shouldn’t expect them to. Just like their team, leaders are in the process of improving their professional development. Showing vulnerability by responding with an “I don’t know” to a question doesn’t make you seem weak. On the contrary, it shows your honesty and humility as a leader. Teams usually appreciate knowing that their leader is just like them and is also on a journey of self-improvement. Having the courage to accept that you don’t know everything helps build credibility, which also boosts trustworthiness.

Tell me more

A great way to build leadership is to start improving your listening skills and the phrase “tell me more” does just that. Not only does it invite your members to share information with you, it also establishes that you want to listen to their opinions and are making time for them. As humans, we really appreciate it when others genuinely want to hear us out, especially when it’s a leader with a busy schedule. Making your members feel heard and appreciated as an employee helps create healthy relationships while also building trust. Rejection can hurt motivation and drive in a team but being open to listening to their ideas can create high performing teams and an overall positive work environment.

INSIDER INFO: Our trust building workshop equips you with a question bank that makes your members feel heard as you acquire the information you need for smooth and drama-free meetings.

Trust Begins with You

As much as we want our team to trust us as leaders, it all starts within. Having trust in yourself first can then translate to others trusting you. Imagine your members asking you for the next plan of action. If you don’t trust yourself to make the right decisions, your team will also feel unsafe to fully commit to your plan (if you’re not sure of it, how can they be sure?).

It’s all about finding the sweet spot between trusting yourself and trusting others. Trust in your abilities and skills as a leader but also trust your team and be open to considering alternative viewpoints that you may not have thought of.

PRO TIP: Personal excellence begins with understanding yourself before improving confidence in the workplace. Tap into your emotional intelligence and learn to manage your emotions before tackling the relationships around you.

As the sayings go — trust is a two-way street, trust is about give and take, trust takes two hands to clap!

References:

https://www.todayonline.com/big-read/big-read-prolonged-pandemic-tests-trust-between-bosses-and-workers-and-picture-isnt-pretty

https://www2.deloitte.com/us/en/insights/economy/covid-19/guide-to-organizational-recovery-for-senior-executives-heart-of-resilient-leadership.html?id=us:2sm:3li:4di_gl:5eng:6di

https://www.executivedevelopment.com/virtual-leadership-trust-not-control/

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/health-fitness/mind/trust-supersense-become-fully-human/

https://trustedadvisor.com/trustmatters/three-little-words

https://hbr.org/2019/02/the-3-elements-of-trust?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod&referral=00203

Here’s a (not so) fun fact: The World Health Organization (WHO) recognises burnout as a medical condition. 

Worry, stress and anxiety have become society’s new best friends post-pandemic. Reports from the Anxiety and Depression Association of America revealed that around 40 million people in the United States suffer from an anxiety disorder.

We often use the terms worry, stress and anxiety interchangeably but they don’t all mean the same thing.

Some topics we tend to worry about are our finances, job security and health and when we are transfixed on them, it can push us into a mental state where it becomes difficult to concentrate on other things. 

While worry is something that starts in our minds, it can manifest into stress, which affects our physical well-being. Stress is incited by external circumstances and causes a response in both our mental and physical state. Stress can make us feel irritable, tired and even cause digestive and muscle pain.

Anxiety can be defined as a combination of worry and stress. In the words of Associate Professor of Psychiatry, Dr Marques: anxiety is a response to a false alarm. Think of a time when you had to present an idea to important clients, and you were well-prepared for it yet couldn’t help but feel anxious because false alarms were going off in your head — What if I am not prepared? What if they don’t like my presentation? What if I am incapable of such a responsibility?

These what-ifs are signs of anxiety.

INSIDER SECRET: Pent up stress and chronic anxiety can cause conflict within your team. We discuss how to manage disagreements and improve communication in our workplace stress management workshop with the goal of building a productive and safe work environment.

Employee burnout

Being a leader is not only about assigning tasks and guiding team members, but also identifying the signs of burnout and stress in your team. In today’s world, building a relationship with your team virtually can be hard work but with operations moving online, it’s more important than ever to know how to build trust in a virtual team. By paying attention to the behaviours of your team and instilling healthy communication, you can recognise the signs of burnout to help them deal with it better.

If your team appears disengaged, are skipping meetings and are unenthusiastic about new projects, they may be stressed out

Another sign of employee burnout is when they begin to cut connections with peers and come across as distant. Pushing people away is a common sign of stress.

A sudden decrease in the productivity of your team can also be a sign of burnout.

If one of your team members is suddenly offended by feedback, there may be something bothering them.

As a leader, it’s not always about giving instructions and directing your team. The relationship between leader and team is a two-way street where you offer your listening ear as well. 

PRO TIP: The Better Conversations workshop is created for professionals with the goal of improving listening skills to tackle challenging conversations with ease.

Leadership Fatigue

Leaders take on multiple roles in the workplace to ensure their business runs smoothly. They are coaches, strategists, decision-makers and even mediators when handling conflict among team members. With so much on their plate, the pressure can be overwhelming and may also increase anxiety. 

Burnout reduces your energy levels, makes you unproductive, feel resentful and even compromises your health. Leadership fatigue can greatly affect business production as burned-out leaders may even lose confidence in themselves when making important decisions. With nearly 60% of leaders reporting feeling used up at the end of a workday, it’s important to be able to identify signs of leadership burnout at its early stages or risk prolonging exhaustion. Here are some possible signs of burnout:

When your initial passion is causing dread 

Getting irritated with your team frequently 

Turning to self-medicating tendencies like excessive drinking or eating 

Losing your cool over small situations

It’s easy to overlook the well-being of leaders when they’re expected to have their lives together but after all, they’re human too. Some leaders may have the false perception that they need to develop leadership skills for the sake of their team. Many fail to know that leadership includes accessing their feelings and managing them to be the best version of themselves. 

“Burnout is what happens when you try to avoid being human for too long”

~ Michael Gungor

6 Powerful Tips to Beat Burnout

Burnout is on the rise. The reputation and market value of organisations are at stake due to the increase of work-related stress, and this is why organisations worldwide are resorting to workplace stress management workshops. While you’re looking out for your team’s well-being, improving personal excellence and leading high performing teams also requires you to keep your mental and emotional health in check.

These few tips below will show you how to develop yourself as a leader by helping you beat physical and emotional exhaustion from work.

1. Use your purpose as a reminder

Whenever you feel like it is impossible to continue, remind yourself of why you love your job. What is your greatest motivation for waking up every morning and going to work? For some, money might be their greatest motivation and for others, it may be the experience of guiding and coaching fresh minds. Rather than being fixed on the negatives, find the positives in your work.

Whenever you’re battling hurdles, defining your purpose helps to create a clearer path to follow. At times, it’s easy to lose track of your purpose so little habits like having a motivational quote on your mobile wallpaper can keep you focused.

2. Approach new ideas with a fresh mindset

Have you ever asked yourself why we’re always more enthusiastic about trying something new? Don’t you find it interesting that a new face in a team can be more creative and innovative compared to someone who has been doing the same work for years? This is because a beginner’s mind is interested in exploring maximum possibilities while an experienced mind thinks in a direction it has been trained to follow for years.

In her work, ‘Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind’, Shunryu Suzuki says: “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few.” Leaders who understand that young, fresh minds are an asset to the team are likely to be more successful than those who believe experience is everything. When leaders and their team practise looking through a beginner’s lens, it allows for most creativity and adaptability to new projects.

Moving away from the status quo and looking at things differently is definitely challenging. A great example is the shift to virtual meetings we’ve experienced in the last couple of years. Leaders that chose not to update their skills with the latest technological tools have been left behind in this COVID-19 world. On the other hand, leaders that were excited to learn how to host engaging online events for their team have thrived.

3. Don’t be afraid to experiment 

For many of us, cooking is an experimental experience. When you’re stumped on what to whip up for dinner and with just a few ingredients left in the fridge, you have no choice but to get creative. Sometimes, you may end up with a bland plate but there’s also the possibility of discovering your new favourite dish. You never know when experimenting in the kitchen could create a well-loved family recipe! 

This art of experimenting in the kitchen can also be used in the workplace. We’re always so afraid of making mistakes and failing and it is exactly this mindset that’s killing our creativity. Taking risks can land you surprising results and while uncertainty will always be there, progress requires some experimenting!

4. Discover your interests away from the desk  

While our jobs are an important part of our lives, we shouldn’t revolve our personalities around it. Humans are multifaceted beings and when we’re placed in a box, that’s when we start to lose creativity and the thirst for adventure, and leadership is definitely a creative adventure. When you’re consumed by work, you begin to lose touch with yourself, which is why we’re always encouraged to unwind from our desks to explore other hobbies. 

Exercise is one habit that we can incorporate into our daily lives to boost endorphins and improve our moods. If you ever feel agitated in the workplace, step out for a run to clear your head! Taking up hobbies such as painting, gardening and cooking can also boost our creative juices whenever we find ourselves in a rut.

5. Channel anger for positive outcomes

As humans, it’s normal to get angry and heated in situations that have upset you. As leaders, you may sometimes suppress these feelings to avoid workplace conflict and animosity among your team. Bottling up feelings may actually do more harm as it encourages passive-aggressive behaviour, which can eventually hurt the psychological safety of the workplace. 

Firstly, we need to understand that anger isn’t a bad thing that should be avoided. A lot of the time, internalising your anger can illuminate the core of the issue. Pay attention to the reason you’re angry — you could be lacking sleep, feeling hungry, or in need of a break. Once you have processed your emotions, take the next steps to fulfil your needs.

Instead of directing your anger to someone else with sarcasm and spiteful words, figure out what your anger is requiring from you. Anger is not a bad thing but learning to manage it can help you grow professionally and personally to create an overall healthy and productive work environment for your team.

INSIDER SECRET: EQ workshop for leaders dives into the neuroscience behind leading with clarity, which includes tapping into your emotional intelligence to strengthen relationships. 

6. Lean on those you can trust

Leaders are expected to be on their top form at all times but stress and anxiety can get the better of them, just like all humans. Self-care is just as important for leaders to ensure they unwind from the pressures of work. However, some may react negatively to stress by keeping in their emotions as relying on others may seem like a sign of weakness. Sharing your feelings can be a vulnerable thing to do but letting your burdens off your chest can also be cathartic.

After a stressful day at work, try to wind down by meeting up with close friends or spending time with your family. Rather than closing your doors to everyone around you, open it to those you can trust. Surrounding yourself with a good support system can improve your emotional and mental well-being, and positively impact your work environment. 

When we think about professional development for leaders, we may immediately assume it refers to increasing your knowledge of managing your external environment. However, a huge part of developing leadership skills also begins internally where you learn to access your emotions and mental well-being. Neglecting this part of the learning process can easily manifest into a burnout and if you do ever experience one, we hope these tips may come in handy. 

References:

https://corp.smartbrief.com/original/2021/10/leadership-fatigue-thing-make-time-recharge

https://corp.smartbrief.com/original/2020/08/how-bust-3-anger-myths

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/26/smarter-living/the-difference-between-worry-stress-and-anxiety.html

https://www.ddiworld.com/global-leadership-forecast-2021

“If no one knows what you know or how you feel, it’s as good you not knowing or feeling.”

~ Sharmini Suthan

 Through the times, businesses have changed. While communication has always been an important skill, today it has grown as the key to success for organisations and leaders.

 Leading a team is not easy. Leaders have high expectations on their shoulders. Leadership is not just about targets, it’s about motivating and growing the team, which is why leaders who are good communicators stand out.

 If you have an idea for a particular project, but you are unable to convey this idea to your team or your client, it is of no use. Being able to convey information is more important than having the expertise. No matter where you go, you'll be needing good communication skills to put your thoughts into words.

 Good communicators understand that communication is a two-way process. It is not only about delivering what you know but also about how you receive information from others. Two critical factors influencing communication - giving and receiving – are key ingredients to communicate a compelling vision to achieve the desired results.

What hinders leaders doing exactly that?

At times we are so focused on what we have to say that we forget about adapting our content, let alone improving our psychological wellbeing for the conversation.

● The lack of proper planning before communicating

● Knowing the nature of the audience. We face different groups of people or individuals – internal and external stakeholders that make up the work we do.

● When trust is missing in a team, no matter what you do you won’t be able to communicate effectively.

PRO TIP! Before any conversation, take out some time to frame your message to position the message you want to convey. Spend some time to warm up your voice and body. Walk out into the sun or up and down the stairs. Drink some warm water. It will help make you and the message more genuine, an important component of influencing people.

Factors influencing effective communication for leaders

A leader is as good as she communicates.

INSIDER HOPE: Our heart goes out to all the leaders out there. We feel you! All those high expectations on your shoulders. Please make sure that while you strive for optimal performance, you are also improving your overall wellbeing.

Let’s examine 3 big factors of communication and influence.

Authenticity

Find that unique voice that reflects your values and vision. Vulnerability and integrity are two things that draw people towards you and increases respect and loyalty.

Authenticity matters a lot when it comes to communication and influence.

Succinct

Being concise implies being spot on. While communicating when you lose yourself in detail, there are high chances you’ll lose the attention of your audience. Clarity is extremely important when it comes to effective communication. You want your audience to reach the desired point without losing them in between. As Jerry Weissman puts it, “Don’t make your audience think.”

Here’s a pithy and neat way to pitch ideas.

First, what is the context,

Then, why is this important,

Finish with what’s the impact.

Do not forget to add the call to action or ask.

Connectivity

Communication and influence require building logical and emotional connectivity between the speaker and the listener. Both these bridges reside in different parts of the human brain. And, in many instances, when making a business case we tend to focus on the logical argument only, ignoring the other.

And, by doing so, we make it easy for the listener to counter with another set of data that negates yours.

It involves scaffolding key skill sets such as improving listening skills, better conversation skills, emotional intelligence, how to collaborate with people, aligning purpose and articulating for influence.

When we establish a personal connection with our audience, you can be sure that you will leave an impact. Aside from credibility and reliability, building trust in people requires intimacy.

Here are some practices that will help improve communication skills as a leader.

Be specific and direct

No one wishes to sit around and listen to constant babbling that doesn’t make sense. While communicating do not exaggerate points. Beating around the bush often leads to the other person or group losing interest in what you have to say.

You need to be specific while laying your ideas. Do not let the idea hide behind complex words and information.

PRO TIP! If you need to polish this capability – for yourself or your team – consider the Think on Your Feet® course Singapore.

Lead with the important part of your message

We can all agree that today’s human have a short attention span. While communicating with your team, lead with the most powerful part of the message. It grabs the attention of listeners and hooks them to want to know more.

Remember! Powerful to THEM, not you! 😉

Smoothness is important

A smooth flow of words is very important when it comes to communicating efficiently. Using filler words or sounds lessens the impact of your message, it also indicates lack of preparedness. You don’t want it to come out as if the issue of low importance to you.

You wouldn’t appreciate a jerky, bumpy, brake riddled journey when a driver takes you from Point A to Point B, would you?

Emote with your body

Emotions are contagious. When you are passionate, energetic, enthusiastic, your vibe will ripple through your audience.

A simple sentence like- ‘I know we can make it' when conveyed with a strong voice emphasis and a stable yet relaxed posture with strong eye contact will make others believe in it.

It is not just about what you say, how you say it also matters. Your non-verbal cues can either add value to your message; or detract it.

Listen and observe

Improving listening skills is very important to becoming good at communication and influence.

In a rush to share opinions, people don’t pay attention to what others have to say, significantly reducing the chances of learning something new.

An improving listening skills workshop will tell you to listen to what is being said and what is not being said. Plus, how it was said or not.

Keep you eyes and ears open!

Share stories

I dare say, no one hates stories. We all love stories.

We connect with stories easily, quickly and naturally. Stories have both the logical and emotional bridge the listener’s brain craves. Our brain is instantly and thoroughly engaged.

Why then do we not intuitively use stories to make the complex simple or to influence?

Ask them to ‘say more’

What does your team need from a leader? Flexibility and understanding are two things any team expects from their leader. Your team members need the leader to be open to their ideas.

“Tell me more” can do wonders when it comes to improving communication and building trust in teams. When you ask your team members to speak, they will be motivated to come up with ideas and solutions which will increase optimal performance in your organisation.

By giving them the opportunity to speak, experiment, to share opinions, we open doors for psychological safety and trust to flourish between you and your team. They will have the freedom of expression, to raise concerns and express doubts in front of you.

What can poor communication cost you as a leader?

It is natural for us to think that we might overshare and try to limit our words when communicating. But it will do more harm than good. An organisation lacking transparency cannot be psychologically safe to work in. It will hamper progress in wellbeing.

When you are not able to communicate ideas properly or communication becomes unorganised, things are going to become messy for you.

Poor communication can make a company lose their value. It may lead to losing a client or worse land you in court.

Leaders with poor communication skills seldom make good leaders.

Reference:

1. https://www.mcgill.ca/engage/files/engage/effective_leadership_is_all_about_communicating_effectively_luthra_dahiya_2015.pdf

2. https://www.smartbrief.com/original/2021/12/elevate-workplace-conversations-these-2-words

3. https://www.smartbrief.com/original/2022/01/how-can-leaders-improve-connection-new-year

4. https://www.ccl.org/articles/leading-effectively-articles/communication-1-idea-3-facts-5-tips/