dad, you’ve come around once again.. i don’t know how to feel with you around. an awkward tension lingers in the air when you’re around, like you don’t understand what’s happening around you. but you know that we aren’t as close to you as we once were and i can see your heart breaking with every sad look you give us. you want to apologize, don’t you? you want to say you’re sorry and that you regret ever leaving us for her. but i can tell that you won’t bring yourself to do it, not yet, in fear of hurting us again when you’re away. addiction has made you become a different person.. a person that you don’t even recognize. you fear him, the man who was angry and hurt all of the time. i don’t blame you.. i was scared of him too. he wasn’t a good person, he took over you and made you become something that you thought you’d never be. please, don’t waste your time fearing him anymore, i spent way too much of my time doing just that and it got me absolutely no where. i know that you can overcome him and i’m putting a lot of trust into you right now. please.. whatever you do, don’t leave again. don’t turn into him again.
