Cyanide

my cursed sword doesn't even tell me to kill people anymore it keeps begging me to put on a skirt and tights

I already know I'm a girl dickhead I just like wearing pants

doctors and scientists would refuse to fund a study on how badly i carnally crave abby anderson because they wouldn’t be able to find a cure

he said that dick is a weapon and I’m In Danger

multiples of 5 are honorary even numbers to me. does anyone else feel this

Asunder is basically the most classic way to be torn, and if you're looking to be cleft, in twain is a vintage but stunning choice

I’m literally in my beast form going to bed

a chainsaw is a lot like a hot glue gun

when you have one in your hands you start to get Ideas about your surroundings