Everything!

BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS NOT CAROL OF THE BELLS

IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE/SARAJEVO 12/24 AND IT IS SO MUCH FUCKING MORE THAN CAROL OF THE BELLS.

so during the bosnian war (which was this nasty-ass conflict in bosnia and herzgovina) there was this badass cello-playing motherfucker named vedran smailovic. He was from Sarajevo, was upset about all the shit and nastiness that came about through this war (this was full-on brother-killing-brother shit!) that he went around to bombed-out, blown up buildings and funderals––where he was at risk of FUCKING SNIPER FIRE––and playing the cello. This guy was so set on providing one tiny spot of beauty in a seriously nasty war he was risking being fucking SHOT OR BLOWN UP.

AND THIS IS THE GUY WHO INSPIRED THIS SONG.

He’s why there’s the calm cello part at the beginning before everything gets all violent-sounding. It’s THEMATIC.

Ahem.

It’s called the Zinger Chair.

Here’s a picture of it:

It’s an electric wheelchair that’s controlled by the levers on the sides (so yes, you do need two hands to operate it, just like a manual). It’s only 40 pounds and can be folded down to fit into any trunk. The creators/managers all seem to be wheelchair users. I personally talked to one on the phone who told me the features he uses.

You don’t understand, I’ve been in New York City for almost four months now and it’s been incredible and in that time, I’ve wheeled my manual chair about 300 miles (there are times I’m going up to 40 blocks a day) and I am so sore and so bruised and so tired and it’s going to s n o w soon and even though the city won’t get nearly as much snow as upstate, it’s still not going to be fun, but I’ve always been afraid to get a big, bulky, electric chair because I don’t want to:

A.) Completely give up my autonomy.

B.) Have a 500 pound electric chair run out of power and have to figure out how the heck I’m getting it and me home.

But this chair, this chair, lads…

This chair can get me all the way from my apartment down the island to Times Square and into Amorino for the world’s best waffles/gelato/hot chocolate before it even considers running out of power. And it only takes 3 hours to fully charge AND if for some reason, something happens, it can be folded up and put into any NYC cab and I’m just so, so, excited. NYC is filled with so many hills that I’ll now be able to go up/down without straining myself. I’ll be able to take the M5 down Riverside and still get to the center of the island without heaving and huffing and sweating. I just really, really, hope it all works out!

IT’S HERE!

First of all, I can’t believe you gave this over 7,000 notes. Especially since this was just a personal post about how excited I personally was to personally receive this personal wheelchair for my personal needs. I get that other people may want to use this but seeing this many notes—it’s actually really distressing. I mean, I’m excited that you’re excited but there was a really good chance this could have all been a giant scam and the wheelchair could have shown up defective or, worse, could have never showed up at all. Please, please, please be cautious when looking at mobility equipment and medical supplies. I know it’s exciting to see new designs and innovations but it’s extremely dangerous to blindly put your faith in medical supplies without thoroughly researching them. That’s how so many people with disabilities end up getting scammed with faulty equipment that breaks down and breaks their bank accounts. Please be smart and be careful. 

Anyway, mother henning aside, THIS CHAIR IS AMAZING AND I LOVE IT!

I’ve only had it for a day but I already love it so much. This afternoon, I took it all the way from my apartment to my campus (about 40 blocks). And this evening, I took teh challenge of going to a grocery store about five blocks away and getting some groceries.

Things to consider:

- It’s going to take me (and you) a long time to get used to the driving mechanics. You definitely need both hands for this. If you’re like me and you like using your feet and twisting your body and grabbing the walls/furniture to help you move, you can but it’ll only get you so far. You need to have both hands on the levers and believe me, it’s hard to remember this. There were times when I’d slow to a halt and look around, wondering what was going on, before realizing my hand had casually gone to my lap. Additionally, the act of pushing and pulling both levers simultaneously to go forward/brake and alternating to turn is a very strange process and while I like it, again, it takes some getting used to.

- There are three speed options which I affectionately dub slow, “now we’re cooking”, and ludicrous speed. Slow is just what it sounds like, a slow coast, which I used in my apartment, the deli, and the grocery store so that I could easily maneuver around things. When I felt comfortable on the sidewalks, I switched up to the next speed which is noticeably faster than my own self-propelled speed in my manual chairs. And at one point, on the downtown stretch starting at 135th and Broadway (those of you who know it know exactly what I had to do and why), I turned it onto ludicrous speed and let me tell you mates, for as many books as I’ve written featuring wheelchair-using superheroes, for a moment, I actually felt like one. I was flying down that hill. Literally flying. I mean literally I think my wheels came off the ground. 100% recommend this speed button for this specific stretch of blocks but honestly, unless I have to book it to a class or an event, I’ll stick to the speeds that don’t make me feel like my soul is being ripped from my body.

- Doors were tricky as again, it requires two wheels to maneuver, but I think I can manage with some practice. Doors going in is nothing. I destroyed them. Doors that come out was a bit harder.

- Asphalt really confused it??? Like we hit a road that was covered in it and it just sort of spluttered and whined and made it clear that it was not a fan. I mean it coaxed through eventually (my motivational speech to it definitely helped I’m sure) but yeah, just so you know, certain textures seem to be better than others. I’m honestly not sure how well it’s going to do in the heavy snow or on something like grass. Luckily NYC seems to lack either so—I’m personally good.

- All in all, today, I wheeled about 3 miles and the battery showed that it was on a half charge which sounds about right.

- You don’t understand I wheeled 3 miles, 50ish blocks, without so much as breaking a sweat! My back/arms/shoulders/hands aren’t aching any more than the chronic pain, I’m not overly exhausted, I wheeled 50 blocks like it was nothing! Even better, my hands aren’t covered in dirt and mud and hair (why do you all shed so much hair?). These calloused appendages definitely deserved this break.

- Getting it on the bus was admittedly difficult but I think that was on me more than the chair as I kept stalling on the ramp, causing it to slide back down. But I was eventually able to get on and still be strapped down so that’s definitely still a possibility.

- I went up hills, down hills, up ramps, down ramps, into uneven elevators, down uneven curbcuts, over potholes, over cracks, into one of those side-sidewalk construction zone things, etc. and the chair handled it all like the boss it is, I love it and am proud of it.

- I’ve affectionately named it Zing. This is important for you to know.

- Yes, it’s $2100. Yes, it’s worth it. Yes, it’s still one of the cheapest chairs on the market. Yes, the person who reblogged this a few days ago to complain about the price doesn’t know what they’re talking about.

- I almost took out a row of Christmas trees and a fruit stand (typical). Again, it’s definitely going to take some getting used to.

- IF YOU’RE INTERESTED IN DOING FURTHER RESEARCH ON THIS CHAIR TO SEE IF IT’S RIGHT FOR YOU, HERE IS THE LINK: zingerchair.com

- YES, I KNOW YOU ALL ARE REBLOGGING THE LINK FROM THE ONE BLOG BUT WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, THERE’S A REASON I DIDN’T SHARE THE LINK WITH YOU ALL. SEE THE FIRST PARAGRAPH.

- Also Zinger has a promotion where you and I can both get money if I refer you so seriously, if you’re really interested in it, check out this website and message me so that I can give you my details: https://www.zingerchair.com/rdo

IN CONCLUSION, THIS CHAIR IS AMAZING, YOU ALL NEED TO EXERCISE PRECAUTION WHEN SEEING RANDOM POSTS ABOUT MEDICAL SUPPLIES ON THIS WEBSITE, AND I ALMOST CRASHED INTO A FRUIT STAND IN THE MOST CARTOONISH WAY POSSIBLE!

I’ll make an update in about a week to tell you how things are going but in the meantime, PLEASE SIGNAL BOOST THIS VERSION OF THE POST!

(By the way, I made the original post five days ago and it is currently 11:02 PM on December 17th, 2017. Just putting it out there because tumblr never does.)

James Potter.

James Potter, the spoiled, arrogant, millionaire teenager who was probably just a smidgen more humble than Dudley when it came to his birthday presents.

He got everything he ever asked for. We’re talking new broomsticks, we’re talking front row tickets to see the Weird Sisters, we’re talking a private shopping spree through Honeydukes. Literally the only reason this kid wasn’t the wizarding equivalent of Gatsby is because he was too busy being a little shit instead of taking his wealth seriously. There are two dates in James Potter’s world. His Birthday and the non-important dates.

So when his seventeenth birthday comes, his seventeenth birthday, all of Hogwarts is bracing themselves. James writes Mr. and Mrs. Potter, tells them exactly what he wants, and sends it off. He and Sirius head home for the day because he’s James Potter and he can do what he wants. They return that evening and the entire Common Room crowds around him to see what he got. He happily shows them all the sweets, his new owl who he loves and will passionately defend, the scarf his mother knitted for him.

“Yeah, yeah,” someone says. “But what about the watch?”

After all, this is it. The present. The present that every child knows they’re getting. The Gryffindors are all excitedly waiting to see what Mr. Potter’s watch looks like. He’s rich, after all, so it must be loaded with studs and diamonds. The Hallelujah chorus probably plays when you crack it open to view the time. 

“Oh, yeah,” James absentmindedly says, petting his new owl. “Moody gave me one of his. It’s pretty cool. Shrieks bloody murder every time it’s around someone it doesn’t trust. I had to shove it under my pillow though. It started going off as soon as we entered the dormitory.”

“Weird,” Peter says.

The atmosphere of the room changes as everyone stares at him in disbelief and disappointment.

“Hang on,” someone says. “So instead of getting your father’s watch, you elected to get his [Auror] partner’s watch?”

“Well, it wasn’t my choice to get his, per say,” James says. “But I’m not about to complain. It’s a watch from Alastor damn Moody. Who’d say ‘no’ to that? Anyway, who’s up for a kitchen run?”

But they’re not letting him go and even Sirius is confused. “Mate, why didn’t Mister Potter give you his watch?”

“Dunno,” he said. “Guess someone must’ve told him it wasn’t for me. Kitchens. Let’s go.”

A few days later, James and Sirius step into the Floo again, heading home for the latter’s birthday. They step back into the Common Room several hours later and everyone crowds around, excitedly shouting because Sirius is now in on the stash and they can’t wait to see what luxuries he received (somehow forgetting the Blacks were even richer than the Potters).

There seems to be a virus or some sort of malware going around causing blogs to “send out” chat messages to blogs that they follow asking for help with the purchase of certain items through donations of seemingly small amounts using bitcoin and adds a link to the message.

The message goes as following (at least the first message I got went like this): “Hi there buddy. I need help, I’m trying to buy a laptop and I can’t afford it. I’m about 0.36$ short, and I’d really appreciate if you could help me and transfer some money to me via bitcoin using this *link*.”

The small details in the message seems to have a few variations with the greeting, amount and purchased item showing up in different variations from formal to friendly, from 0.016 to 2$ and from a phone case to a laptop among others.

The blogs that are affected send out the messages to blogs that they follow for a long time mostly, so you are most likely to receive the message from a long time, active follower whose name you might recognize or a mutual etc. The blogs that are affected are not spam bots but actual active followers who follow the recipient for months or years and most likely the blogger who “sent” the message is unaware of the message being sent.

DO NOT OPEN THE LINK.

Opening up the link will cause the virus to spread even more and infect your computer/mobile with any sort of malware.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????

eeveelutions + flowers