𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄.

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sensed a shift from the other. something that made eli’s heart shift a little in his chest. ‘ did i do something wrong ? ’ anxiety’s building up in his chest, mind wandering to all the things he could have done to upset him. cautious with the other’s space, even though he wants to touch his hand so fucking badly. ‘ will you just talk to me ? please ? ’ /  @mysteryoflovc.

the words leave their lips before they have time to think about them. doesn’t know why they thought they could handle this, just wanted to have a nice night with lucas so they suggested they go to a show together. but god, the fucking lights and the loud music and everyone talking over it. it’s not something rory can handle even on the best of days. find their head growing dizzy, their breathing getting heavier. doesn’t have a single thought in their brain besides getting the fuck out of there, pushes through the crowd of sweaty and loud people into the cool quiet air outside. can barely catch their breath, kneeling on the curb with their head in their hands when they feel the other come up next to them. and as much as they love them, their stupid fucking brain overrides the feeling with fear. ‘ just - just leave me alone for a second, okay ? ’ they regret it the second it leaves their lips, not something they would ever say to lucas on a good day. head still in their hands, heart racing and now met with the guilt with saying those words to him. ‘ fuck - i didn’t mean - luca ... ’ voice is shaky, feeling dangerously close to a panic attack. ‘ i didn’t .. fuck. ’ / @yourfool.

the praise has rory’s head spinning. it’s something they’re not quite used to, but god it sounds so good coming from eren. tilts their head a bit while he kisses their neck, eyes closing again. the switch from the urgency to this softness almost makes rory want to cry. almost. arms are around his neck, their breathing slowing down a bit. for a moment, anyway. they almost forget what they’ve said until eren says it back. honestly wasn’t expecting him to and they’re almost sure that they’re in a dream. soft eyes blink up at him, eyebrows furrowed. ‘ wha - you do ? ’ quiet and breathy, a stupid question but they don’t really have time to think about it because eren’s kissing them again and they swear that they could live inside his mouth. whines against his lips, can’t get enough of how their tongue feels against his. both hands trail down his torso, eyes following and admiring the shape of him, and they’re so painfully hard. ‘ you wanna touch me baby ? please ? feels so good need you to touch me .. ’ hips are grinding down on his dick so they’re completely full of him, hands holding eren’s hips still there while theirs keep moving. ‘ j - just stay there please, wanna feel you all the way inside me .. god you feel so good, wanna make you cum so bad baby .. ’ 

at this point rory’s been reduced to just a mess of pathetic and desperate noises, putty in eren’s hands. and then he’s pushing into them and making this beautiful sound and rory’s gripping the edge of the counter hard, head spinning, can barely choke out a whimper. god, he’s fucking big, and they love it, but they’re grateful for him going slow at first. mumbling a string of swears against eren’s lips, hands searching for something better to hold on to. ‘ f - fuck .. baby .. feels so good .. ’ they grip hard onto the other’s arms, not able to even keep their eyes open. of course they’ve had their fair share of hookups before, but nothing that mattered. nothing like this. and it’s making them feel a little dizzy. hands slide down eren’s arms, intertwining their fingers with his. ‘ so big .. you’re so perfect .. ’ lovesick babbling, heart eyes blinking up at him. and then it comes out before rory can even think about it, before they even realize what they’re saying, and maybe it’s an accident, but it’s not a mistake. ‘ fuck - i love you .. ’  face is flushed, they can feel their hair sticking to their forehead. sure they look less than beautiful but they don’t really care because they know they’re safe with him. pulls him in for another kiss, whines and moans falling out of their mouth and into his. has to force themselves to pull away, because they swear they could do that for the rest of their life. ‘ ah - fuck baby, k - keep going but can you just - slow down for a second ? gonna fuckin make me pass out .. ’ they’re breathing heavy, need a moment to catch their breath. needs a moment to take in what’s actually happening. hands find their way into eren’s hair, gently toying with the strands. ‘ y - you feeling okay ? i’m doing okay ? ’

eren has them so far gone that they can barely think at all. has them whining, high pitched and desperate, reaching out for him, letting him do whatever he wants with their body. breath hitches once he takes his boxers off, their mouth almost watering at the sight of it. moans at the name he calls them, blush on their cheeks deepening. obediently takes his fingers in their mouth, watery eyes blinking up at him. they’re a brat, of course, but eren makes them want to be good for him. takes them deeper down their throat, choking a bit. pulls off, lips red and swollen and drool spilling down their mouth. ‘ i - is that good enough baby ? please .. need you to touch me. make me behave. make me yours .. you can do whatever you want to me .. ’ fingers dance along his torso and down to touch his dick, whining and whimpering as they start to jerk him off slowly. ‘ that feel good baby ? wanna make you feel even better .. use me to make yourself feel good please ? mnh .. fuck baby. ’ one hand’s touching eren and the other touching themselves, not able to stop the noises coming out of their mouth. they feel pathetic. filthy. but they fucking love it. ‘ l - look what you made me into baby. just stupid, so stupid i c - can only think about your dick and how bad i need it - ah fuck - fuck me eren. ’ 

the noises rory’s causing eren to make are so fucking melodic to them, so sweet and calming and their heart is pounding and they’re realizing this is actually fucking happening. stupid little smile when he says they’re annoying. knows he doesn’t mean it, and even if he does rory finds it kind of endearing. they’re a little startled by eren starting to take off their shirt - realizes people they’ve hooked up with before usually didn’t really bother with stuff like that. didn’t really bother being .. close. with intimacy. at least not like this. feels a little self conscious, but they like it. likes that he wants to see all of them. moans into his mouth, feeling of his tongue against theirs causing butterflies to erupt in their stomach. bites on their lip, heart eyes blinking up at eren. ‘ y - yeah baby .. please ? want you to fuck me .. w - wanna feel you inside me .. ’ their tone is almost whining, can feel their face getting hotter and hotter. of course, eren can make them act like a total brat and then make them incredibly shy on the flip of a dime. all bark and no bite - they’re a little embarrassed of what he does to them. ‘ w - will you fuck me ? please ? want you to leave marks on me .. don’t wanna forget that .. that i’m yours. ’ voice is quiet, stupidly shy. certain that eren can feel their heartbeat. pulls him closer by his belt, mouth falling open when they feel him through his pants. ‘ fuck, you’re so big .. baby .. ’ they’re whining and pulling him in for another kiss and it’s needy and messy and rory’s falling apart for him and they fucking love it. 

rory can talk a big game, act bratty all they want but the truth is eren knows exactly how to make them weak. soft whines fill the room as the other picks them up with ease and sets them on the counter. the way he could just toss them around. god, it made them crazy. lets out a quiet yelp at the feeling of his teeth on their neck, eyes fluttering shut for a moment. ‘ mmm.. ’ they hum lazily, hips grinding into eren’s, hands underneath his shirt. nails digging into his sides. eyes close again when he starts to choke them, a cheeky smile adorning their features. ‘ yeah i think i do, actually, ’ a soft exhale before gently nipping at eren’s lower lip. they could play this game all day, honestly. not one to back down from a challenge, especially not one from the person that makes their head spin constantly, makes them feel like they’re the only person in the world. ‘ and i think you want to. you were so pissed because i was talking to other people, huh ? you want me all to yourself ? ’ hand comes up to the other’s face, a soft touch on his cheek. ‘ i know you do. and i want you. all of you, just for me. ’ takes eren’s hand away from their throat, pulls him closer to kiss down his neck, sucking bruises into the soft skin. just wants to hear him moan, hear that they’re making him feel good. pulls away after they’re satisfied, dark eyes admiring the other’s face. ‘ you’re perfect. don’t you wanna show me how much i belong to you ? just you, baby ? ’ of course they’d noticed eren’s protectiveness of them, and it made their heart swell. he made them insane.

rory feels like an absolute fucking mess, something so disgusting that shouldn’t be shown the kind of compassion and care eren’s showing to them. they don’t understand it. doesn’t know if they really want to. eyes close for a moment as the other pulls them closer, his hand in their hair grounding them just a bit. they hate how often this happens. hate how their mind convinces them to drink until they can’t feel much of anything. and then this happens. a soft chuckle escapes their lips at his words. lets their mind indulge in it for a moment. ‘ why .. are you so fucking nice to me ? i’m so stupid. this isn’t your job but you do it anyway.. ’ their face is flushed, head in their hands. relieved that eren doesn’t have to look at them right now. sure that they look disgusting. but the way he’s holding them, the soft touches across their skin, it takes that feeling away just a little bit. somehow he always seemed to take that away. even just a bit. ‘ i’m supposed to go out in like an hour. sing songs about how much of a mess i am. bare my entire fucking soul to these people that don’t .. they don’t fucking know me ! and i’m drunk. so many people would be disappointed. my manager’s gonna kill me. ’ bites at their lip, mind racing. trying not to start crying then and there. ‘ but i really wanna fucking go home. i don’t wanna be here. ’ maybe that statement had multiple meanings, but rory really doesn’t wanna think about that right now.

they’d had a bit of alcohol, sure. usually did after stupid events they had to go to - it calmed their nerves. didn’t think it was clouding their judgment too much until those words fell from their lips. and they didn’t even mean for it to come off the way it did, but they do have a bit of an attitude problem. apparently. a slightly hazy mind registers eren’s grip on their arm, pulling them away from a crowd into a dimly lit bathroom. soft gasp at the way the other’s gripping their face, a pale blush blooming across already pink cheeks before they tilt their head up and let out a giggle. god, they fucking love when eren gets like this. hand comes up to grip his wrist. ‘ you don’t scare me, baby. ’ honestly it’s rare that rory acts like this, usually always polite and soft spoken, but something about the other made them want to act up so fucking bad. ‘ you wanna hear it again then ? ’ their other hand wanders up to eren’s hair, fingers tangling in the mess and tugging just a bit, dark eyes focused on his lips. ‘ i told you to shut the fuck up. that make you mad ? god it’s so easy with you .. ’ they’re acting big and bad, but under the facade their heart’s beating crazy in their chest, hoping they’re not going too far.

dizzy eyes try to focus on the dirty bathroom tiles beneath them. always gets so anxious before things like this, things where rory has to talk about themselves, what inspires their art, things that feel a little too personal to share with strangers. it’s an hour or two before they’re supposed to go on and they’re feeling a little sick from the alcohol that they’ve quickly consumed. they’re all too aware that eren’s behind them while they’re clutching the toilet seat and retching, not too anxious to be embarrassed about it. ‘ sorry.. ’ they breathe, clammy hands pushing messy curls back while their head is spinning. ‘ you .. you don’t have to be here you know ? ’ manages to get it out before vomiting into the disgusting toilet in front of them, shame burning into their cheeks. ‘ sorry..’ voice is quiet as they bury their head in their hands. / @yourfool .

soft blush blooms across theo’s cheeks at their request. ‘ um .. have you met me ? not exactly the world’s best artist .. but whatever you say, baby boy. ’ spends a good few minutes debating on what he wants to put on his baby’s thigh forever. ‘ mm, you do this with all the boys ? ’ an idea and he tugs on the waistband of the other’s sweatpants, far enough so he can get a good view of the space he’s working with. ‘ ready ? deep breath , good boy .. ’ starts poking with the needle, soft eyes checking in with damien’s to make sure they’re okay. other free hand is squeezing his, no matter if he needs it or not. tongue sticks out in concentration. ‘ there .. ’ a breath after ten minutes, theo rubbing an alcohol wipe over the space. it’s a shitty drawing of the bleachers they first kissed under in high school. a nervous cough and brown eyes meet theirs. ‘ look. that okay ? um ... it’s like .. supposed to be a drawing of the bleachers we first kissed under. do you like it ? ’

a sharp exhale as damien touches the wound on his cheek - it’s not bad honestly, the feeling just brings back memories he wishes he could bury deep deep in his memory forever. ‘ do we have to - okay we’re doing the whole alcohol thing .. ’ eyes shut as he feels the sting of it on his face. ‘ it’s nothing, pretty. fuckin’ cat got me earlier. ’ smiles at the charmander bandaid they put on and everything seems to slow for a moment - this is his fucking life. an apartment in new york city with his forever love and this stupid cat that he won’t admit he loves. and of course damien had gotten presents for him. because they’re fucking adorable. sighs as he’s led to the couch with his lover, pats his lap for the other to lay his head down on him. can’t help but laugh at the name - spiderman. it’s so fucking stupid to him. ‘ yeah, spiderman. i dunno he just seems like he’s a little cocky .. ’ sore hands wander to damien’s messy curls, tugging through them softly. an amused smile and a light blush on theo’s cheeks as they’re praising this so-called hero. remembers the encounter and how he so badly wanted to shake them and tell them to pay attention to the damn road. eyebrows quirk at their comment, poking their cheek. ‘ oh skimpy huh ? got a little crush damie ? wanna see me in that stupid little suit ? i’ll be your spiderman yeah ? ’ he’s teasing, of course. although it’s an odd feeling being jealous of himself. buries bruised knuckles into damien’s hair, scanning their face for that pretty little blush he loves so damn much. ‘ you’re mine, yeah ? you know that ? ’ speaks softly into his ear, placing a soft kiss on the spot between his ear and jawline. can’t help a gentle nip at the skin, either. ‘ besides, you think spiderman could do that ? ’ points to the horribly decorated stockings he spent hours on last night, three of them hanging beside each other. one ‘damie’ with messy liquid glitter hearts around it, one ‘gridz’ with a very poorly drawn cat, and one plain ‘theo’. ‘ don’t think he’s an artist like i am. ’

ears perk up as eren speaks, eyes flitting back up to his face. ‘ you’ve been .. researching ? for me ? like .. about me ? ’ gets this warm fuzzy feeling in their chest at that. no one really tried to understand them before. eyebrows furrow at his question, lips pushing into a pout as they try to think. ‘ um .. no. haven’t seen anyone or anything like that. ’ brown eyes sting with tears, their brain overanalyzing like it always does. ‘ d - do you think i should ? like, go to a doctor ? like .. there’s something wrong with my brain ? ’ deep shaky breath as eren kisses them, eyes closing in an effort not to spiral. never thought about something like that before and it seems a little bit terrifying to them. ‘ mmm .. dunno. watch winnie ? ’ hands reach up to play with eren’s hair, something that always seems to ground them when they’re like this. heart beats faster at his words, a mix of anxiety and comfort. can’t bear the thought of losing him. ‘ y-yeah. i know. not gonna leave you either. i’m like .. a stray dog. found me and took me home and now you’re stuck with me. ’

shit. just barely makes it crawling through the bedroom window before he hears the front door open. wasn’t expecting damien to be back so early. frantically trying to remove his stupid suit and mask, haphazardly discarding them in the closet before pulling on a sweater and sweatpants that were already laying on the ground. a quick glance in the mirror shows a neurotic theo, hair all messed up and face flushed. a tiny scratch on his cheek. whatever. takes a quick peek from the bedroom door to find a nervous looking damien, hands full and struggling to take off their shoes. eyebrows raise and a little giggle escapes pink lips, cautiously walking out to meet the other. ‘ yeah yeah, i - i had a thing but it ended .. early. thought you were gonna be out longer ! ’ tries his hardest to not sound as breathless as he is. eyes the shopping bags, heart swelling at just how fucking cute they are. ‘ i won’t. promise. you’re insane, baby. don’t have to do all this, ya know ? ’ links his pinky finger into the other’s, presses a soft kiss to his blushy nose. runs his hand through his messy curls, biting the inside of his cheek. ‘ um, also you should like - be careful when you’re out. i heard there’s some guy that’s been jumping people all over the city. so .. just don’t get hurt, yeah ? ’ eyes flicker to the tv - they like to leave it on so mcgriddle doesn’t feel alone - only to see the news broadcasting him .. well, spider-him, flying around trying to catch said guy. an exasperated sigh, grabs the remote and turns the tv off. ‘ kinda tired of that guy. ’

just another stupid situation that rory could have avoided if they could just be fucking normal. and they’re so embarrassed. always, so fucking embarrassed by the way they are. the way they act. sometimes they feel like everyone else was given some kind of manual on how to act in the right way and rory’s just been left out. because everything they do feels wrong. the way that grocery store employee was looking at them like they had two heads. can’t get that image out of their brain. hates how it makes them feel. they can never understand the way they’re supposed to fit in the world. and eren’s holding them so tight, whispering sweet nothings to them and trying to soothe their frantic head. face is red, hot tears silently streaming down puffy cheeks. ‘ i - ’ a deep shaky breath, heels of their hands pushing into their eyes. ‘ i - i don’t know why i act like .. like that. ’ they couldn’t speak the whole drive home and even now a good while after it’s almost physically painful for them to talk. ‘ i’m sorry. must’ve been really embarrassing for you ... it’s just like .. like i couldn’t f - find you and i felt like i did when i was a kid and i’d get left behind a lot and i didn’t know if they were coming back .. ’ wipes away stupid tears and tilts their head up to look at eren. those soft eyes that always feel like a salve to their wounds. a big exhale and their eyelids flutter shut. ‘ sometimes it feels like i just wasn’t .. wired right. do you ever feel that way ? ’