The Life of a Tourist

I've been thinking a lot lately about how much I've drifted from the majority of my friends the past six months. I've constantly been trying to figure out if I pushed everyone away, or if I got pushed myself. Either way, I've realized the majority of the time I've asked a very similar question: "What did I do wrong?" Maybe the correct answer is that I've been asking the wrong question. I'm starting to believe that in reality it was not completely my fault. I pushed away some people because I deserved better. I was pushed away because I lived a different lifestyle. I drifted from people because I did not live in the same country as them for a good month. I never got close to the staff because my personality does not click with theirs. It's life. I really need to stop stressing over what I did wrong, kill the depression that creates all the knots in my stomach and realize those people don't care anymore what I mean to them. I deserve better than to live a life fucking full of anxiety because of people whose judgements and existence won't matter to me anymore. I need to just start being happy again.