archived

It slowed to a stop on the side of the highway. The driver, a woman with smudged pink lipstick and a heavy jacket, got out to survey the town before them. She squinted at the oddly shaped cliffs. “Heh.” She twisted on her heel and pounded the roof of the car. “Hey, get out, we’re here! Let’s make a game plan!”

“Finally.” Someone broad-shouldered lurched out of the van and rubbed his head. “I was about to eat someone. Why does it take so long to get anywhere on Earth?”

“Are you sure, Ronnie?” another, smaller voice piped up. “We didn’t really get to see that road sign before you ran over i--!!” His voice broke off into a squeak as someone else rammed a knee into his gut clambering over him. “Shut up, Andrew.” Two more passengers spilled out of the car. 

“Look, you can can see where those 11th dimensional losers crashed!” said one. “Why are we here?” the other whined, eyes hidden behind a tightly drawn hood. “Why can’t we just go back to the Realm, find another Ciph--”

“SHHHHH,” everyone else hissed simultaneously.

“Can you not,” ‘Ronnie’ said seriously. “We do not need him hearing us until we’re totally sure we want him to, okay?”

“But-- but he’s sure to see us, anyway, in this town, he sees everything!” said someone else, a nervous looking younger man with something drawn in black marker on his forehead.

“Let him,” said the broad-shouldered one. “He will see. But he will see less if we don’t give him a reason to watch.”

“Easy for the party tank to say,” ‘Andrew’ muttered, limping over to the group.

“Cipher’s Eye, you’re such a NERD, Kryptos--”

“SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHshut up with his name! Geez!”

The third to last passenger to exit, a man wearing heavy metal bracelets, leaned against the hood of the car. “So, should we consider ourselves defectors, or...?”

The driver raised her hands. “Nobody said anything about defecting, we’re just stopping over here in this dimension because that’s better than wandering around the Mindscape while we decide what to do. D’you know how long it’s been since we’ve had a little time off from the Boss? Let’s-- let’s, y’know, use it! Especially after what happened with Morpho and our last-- our last him.”

After a minute of uncomfortable silence, the man by the car turned to look inside. “Hey, Hector, how’s the big guy holding up?”

“Still carsick.” A man with a squashed hat was trying to reassure the last passenger. “Look, buddy, maybe you’ll feel better if you get out here for some air, huh? Come on. We’ll get you something to eat soon, okay?”

Something in the car rumbles lowly. Then, with some effort, an absolutely massive....animal...covered in masses of dark fur rolls out of the car to rest on the ground. It’s so fluffy that the face is lost to view.

The driver broke away from the group and went to kneel at their pet’s(?) side. “I’m sorry you were all cooped up, you big loaf,” she cooed. “We feel ya. Vessels sure start to feel icky when you’re in them too long. We’ll be off this stupid planet soon, we’ve just gotta hang around here for a couple weeks.”

She stood up. “What’re you all standing around looking at me for? You want me to tell you what to do? Fine.” She pointed. “Make camp over there. We’re doing a food run later tonight. ‘Cause we’ve got to...” She made a face. “...stop our bodies from dying, I guess. Ugh.”