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@crowded-empty-places
There you stand In that place made of distances Where topologies break And worms dance the waltz At the rhythm of apologies In their heads a bow of rain As harlots of babylon In their throats the hyena That shrieks its laughter At a joke made man Masturbating to the cross Counting beads that run Through the knuckles At the speed of thought Waiting for the redemption That has already dissolved As sugar in a glass of wine
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Legio nomen mihi est, quia multi sumus
i am not who you think i am
You are who you think i am
This is the season Of suicidal days Inside a throat that aches and prays Of the steel made heart Home to a love that fell apart Of empty hands That search for yours In an empty world Pregnant with nothingness Miscarried in a kiss ungiven Oh daddy ! Oh mommy ! Unmake me And return me To the pause in the song The place i belong
i was here and i remembered
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i kill myself every day
Just to wake up in the morning
And kill myself again
(...) I am a factory reject (...)
My head is raining blood, I live under the blue of the days My hands fist into doves That fly up high Into the geometry of my thoughts As distorted memories of a world The sea has erased Its silence holding the dream I cannot forget When you wore movies in your eyes And poems in your lips
I hide in my sleep But sleep no longer feels safe Doors open for my name But i don't belong in the room I look into the mirror Autopsy pale A ghost drifting through life Barely living Scattered by a purple gale
Hot enough to melt hopes into regrets As the night falls, The dark night of the soul I am I Am I Was I was
I fell for you Even before I met you
And now …
Now you are just a scream Trapped inside of me As Spring bleeds Into Summer
(...) I am tired of burying empty caskets (...)
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A night of shifting gazes Breaking the fourth wall And staring straight into me As fear trickles in droplets Of ancient amber Cradling a wing that once flew Across the abyss that joins The two sides of despair
I stand here At the end of meaning Longing for the familiarity Of a landscape of ruins I once called mine Searching for myself And wondering how The chrysalis became the butterfly That reflects on a mirror The image of a winged caterpillar
Only the unforgiveable is worth forgiving
Blue skies and deep seas
I am at the cutting edge
Of obsolescence
Went to the pill-popper today
Checked my blood pressure
It read 237/170
"You should be dead !" - says the pill-popper
"I am, it's been years ..." - I say
"Humans are Gods with anuses, creatures capable of infinite imagination, trapped inside a finite bleeding meat that decays and suffocates"
in "The Denial of Death" by Ernest Becker
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I am playing a character
Based on me
So the question is
Who am I ?
What keeps me going Is the consolation of death No more boredom No more anger No more frustration As the indignities that make a life mount up I just count the days down
And sometines something happens Something wondrous A passing smile that Shines from a pretty face An unexpected greeting A forgotten book on a shelf
And then i just start again Reset the clock And restart counting down As indignities mount up
inspired by "Cope", a short movie by Anthony Sutcliffe