Oi oi! Aight so...requests are closed bc theres some maintainence going on~ NSFW, 18+ Blog~ (they/them 21, panro-ace, POC) Feel Free to check out my AO3...when theres stuff on it! [CrispyCrimeArsonTime]
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I havent actively posted anything since maybe 2020, occasionally checking in out of my grave (trying to survive this major im almost there folks we're gonna get it) and like... to cut it to the sweet bits,
i have like... 3 (2 plotted out, 1 halfway written) jjba fics on my AO3 that have kinda just been marinating. The one thats actually uploaded on my AO3, my last posted chapter was like.... maybe... novemeber? and sometimes i get Wishful and Nostalgic about her, and toss in a chapter for the ~120 people who read her, but now im Nostalgic again and im also finishing up my last semester of college and im wondering if (for the 120 people who read the damn thing) i should continue?
i mean... i probably will, i think im just looking for encouragement :')
but its a jjba, oc x character part 5 jjba fic and i think... it would be nice to put her out there :') so...yeah
its the middle of finals week tho so... ill get on it later in the month-
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
aight so
theres gonna be more fandoms on this blog because my brain kinda fizzled out of hxh
HXH
JJK
JJBA
KNY
BSD
bnha (maybe?????????????????????? if it tickles my fancy????????)
and whatever other shows i may end up rotting over :')
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
SO.......i keep dipping in and out of this blog because
a) im tired (generally, not of this blog, just a generally tired person)
b) im thinking about expanding this blog (as in like....the animes that i write for)
- writing for just HXH is pretty constricting when it comes down to it, and i have a lot of other animes that i like (JJBA, JJK, KNY, BSD, etc etc) and id like to put it all here rather than making 7 different blogs :/
- i also want to do more gender neutral & poc reader because i find myself preferring gender-neutral content/reader for... Reasons, and poc reader because it feels nice lol
i'll probably be switching up my theme a bit and revamping as time goes on so like.....look out for that, if youre still interested in the stuff nonsense that I write!!
A/N: so I wrote a nsfw follow up to Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fickle because it was mentioned~
NSFW, 18+!!!
Tags, 18+:Â teasing, riding, edging, overstimulation, blue-balling, oral and fingering (fem, receiving), mentions of drinking, a bit of plot, hate-fucking, blow-job, slight hand-job, choking (maybe more like asphyxiation)
[also available on AO3, https://archiveofourown.org/works/31770619 ]
This is 5.1k words, roughly.
This will also be continued (hopefully) in a third part
NSFW BELOW THE CUT....after some plot.
...Then Beg.
Itâs a wonder what a new view will do for your mind.
It's been just about a month now in your new home tucked away amongst the skyscrapers in the city, the neon lights from surrounding buildings find their way through your window and cast colorful shadows throughout the room. Looking down onto the street there were only specks of people passing by, moving with and against the traffic, towards and away from music and more adventures, a city very much on the move below you. As much as you were in the heart of a lively city, your life had never felt calmer, and you had so much less to worry about in terms of others, and more time to focus on yourself.
PerhapsâŚ. It had been a bit brash to up and leave your previous home all because of someone else's doing, someone elseâs inability to be faithful, but what good would it have done if you stayed there and let him talk his way back into your bed?
He was already in someone elseâs bed, and it wasnât like he needed two of them.
Besides, you had your jewels now, your fine clothing, and your treasures on the account of your work. You were no longer tied to someone who couldnât be bothered acknowledging he was tied to you.
Enough about him, what did he matter?
Leaving the living room, you made your way over to your closet, running your fingers over various fabrics, the lights from outside still spilling into your rooms, adding interesting hues to your clothes. Your hand stopped over a sleek black dress, a satin one with a dip in the front, a classic satin slip dressâŚ
His favorite one.
Even though he wasnât in your room, your home, or even in the building, you could feel him wandering your city during long nights, his presence lingering in bars and restaurants, the sound of his voice bouncing between late-night conversations fading throughout the city. Sometimes youâd feel his eyes on you during the day on your way to work, catch a glimpse of what you thought was his hair in the aisles of stores, feel his hands on you, gently, while you tried on clothes in little boutiques, knowing how much he would love to see you in this dress, that corset, those boots, that set of laceâŚ
He was always near, always lingering, even if you shut him out.
You took the dress from its hanger, stripping yourself of your casual clothes and putting the dress on, admiring the little dress and how it sat on you, sleek yet simple⌠although it left a bit to be desired. You pulled a pair of shoes from your closet, black strappy heels that laced up around your ankles, doing a little spin in the mirror, acknowledging what a wonderful catch you were.
And yet, something felt missing from your little outfit, something to tie it all togetherâŚ
You went back to your closet, flipping through coats, belts, waist beads, tights, and nothing seemed to make the outfit the outfit. You scanned your closet, up and down for about ten minutes before your eyes rested on a lace corset and you took from the rack it sat on and slipped it over your waist, going back to the mirror and inspecting the damage you could cause.
You smiled, just for yourself, knowing you were as deadly as theyâd ever come.
You werenât too sure what possessed you to go out at such an hour, but tonight felt like the night to explore the city and make connections and be free for just a little whileâŚ
Maybe even cause some problems.
You somewhat knew why you were out in the city, but you also partially didnât. You knew it was for him, hoping he would see you in your glory and grovel for you as a result of his pathetic choices, wishing it was him instead of a nobody seeing you in that dress and taking it off of you in the darkness of your apartment, that favorite dress of his, that stunning black dress he loved.
Conversely, you wondered why you cared at all. Werenât you the one who cut him out of your life abruptly at the drop of a phone call, packing you and your things away and running off to a new city, severing the connection as quickly and deeply as possible? Werenât you over it, or at least at peace with yourself, knowing you deserved better than what heâd done? Why were you compelled to go out in the naive hope that maybe he would be there and cast even an absent glance in your direction, almost like a shred of hopeâŚ
You scowled to yourself, the somewhat suppressed turmoil within yourself feeling childish in a way, being at odds with yourself over a disloyal thief with some fame.
Pathetic.
You could say you picked a bar at random, or rather on a feeling that pulled you towards this bar, but deciding which of the two reasons was the real one was not on your agenda tonight.
Almost on cue, pairs of eyes rested on you from all directions, lingering on the straps of the dress, the corset, the heels, everything. You had that bar by the throat tonight.
Sliding into a seat you ordered a drink, something light to start you off for hopefully an interesting night. It wasnât long before someone sat beside you, tossing a sly glance in your direction every so often as they too ordered a drink. He was an average everyday man, nothing special or striking as he attempted to puff out his chest as he ordered a Vieux Carre, finally turning himself halfway towards you. Frankly, you made no efforts on your part of the conversation, not even bothering to look at him as you âtalkedâ, which was mostly him talking about his success in his business⌠or his practice⌠or was it his firm?
Heâd gone on for a few minutes, your clear lack of interest doing nothing to deter his rambling when another man pointed it out to him that you werenât interested, telling him to get lost. You only watched the two bicker out of the corner of your eye, while another man sat on your free side, scoffing about how they were âacting so childish, one trying to be a knight in shining armor for someone who deserves an armyâ.
As if he was even on neighborhood watch.
You paid him no mind either, only curt responses and the occasional smile and huff, focusing on your drink as he too attempted what the previous two had failed at. This was the pattern for about 30 minutes, a trail of desperation trying to find its climax with you, only for hopes to be struck down with an icy glance and a quiet sip from your drink. Youâd heard it all, from growing up in shacks and small towns to living in penthouses with offshore bank accounts, theyâd all come out of the woodworks with you in their sights.
One was currently talking your ear off about the latest political drama when you felt him.
He was here.
You could feel his eyes lingering on the dress, his dress. His favorite dress.
You only sat up and fixed yourself in your seat and shifted your eyes, only offering a sideways glance.
There he is.
Seated in the corner of the bar, the low lights and dull hums of conversation gave him cover as his eyes wandered on your figure. You slowly brought your eyes back forward and ordered another drink, another light thing to sip on. You turned to the current disaster sitting beside you and decided to at least put a little more effort in the conversation, offering a honeyed smile and a giggle where you could, asking dumb little questions and leaning forward, play up that interest, sweetheart.
All the while of showing this stranger all the interest in the world, you had cast your disinterest to someone else, someone who wanted your attention. You could feel it in his aura, you could feel he was trying to keep it at bay, the desire to make himself known to you.
How pitiful, wanting something you so carelessly threw away.
You turned your body to face this stranger, effectively turning your back to Chrollo.
You felt his eyes burn into your back, and you bit your lip to suppress a sneer, earning you a sly smile from your current attention holder. Alas, your little pawn for power-play had somewhere to be the next morning, lamenting on how he had to leave you so early when he didnât want to, quickly talking about how he loved the conversation you two were having. He fears he may never see you again in such a large city.
You borrow a pen from a bartender and scribble your number on a napkin just as the stranger gets up. He beams at you and gives you his own, leaving in a matter of minutes.
He wonât be too upset with that burner number, will he? Tragic.
You waited a little while, finishing your drink before getting up from your spot, giving the bartender a tip before casting a slick glance behind you as you sauntered over towards the exit. You felt that aura spill out, a hush falling over the bar as the only sound heard was the door creaking on its hinges.
He knew that you knew he was there. And you ignored him.
Walking along the streets towards your home, you could still feel his eyes on you, on your legs, right up to how that corset sat on you.
Everything he threw away, everything he missed, and more.
You stopped at a crosswalk, only minutes away from home and you checked your phone, taking interest in your phone contacts and social media accounts. He was close⌠dangerously close. Was he⌠hesitant? So out of character.
You only gave him a half turn and an unamused look, looking straight through him in a way you never had before. The lights of the city casting strange shadows and shapes on his face while casting doubt in your mind that the look in his eyes was a good one. You were only met with a look between desperation and determination as you stared at each other on the street in a city that shouldâve been too big for him to pinpoint you and everything he wanted.
You turned to leave, prepared to cross the street and be lost to him again right as he called your name.
âY/n.â quietly, but he meant it in a way.
How bold of you, Chrollo. How bold.
You turned, not offering an answer but only a slow tilt of your head. He stepped closer as his aura met with your own and if it was not obvious before, his need for you was embarrassingly apparent.
âYou look stunning as always, y/n.â his eyes lingered and at the same time didnât, flitting from one area of your figure to the next, the hem of your dress, the folds in the cut, the reflections in the fabric against the city lights.
âI know.â was your only answer, unmoved by his simple compliments.
He only smiled as he found your eyes again, finally prying them away from your hips.
âI would like to talk, a civil discussion if youâd like,â he stated as best as he could, watching your face for potential rejection.
Heâs getting himself in hot water.
âTalk about what? Whatâs there to say?â you asked, body itching to go home already.
âI left a lot of things unsaid when I shouldnât have, y/nâ he put on that classic sweet voice of his, a voice that would always put you at ease⌠when it shouldnât have.
âYou should have said it on the phone.â you finally turned to walk away as he spoke again, this time making you stop.
âI owe you an explanation, y/n. At least let me give you that.â
You looked over your shoulder, unable to deny him this one moment of redemption.
Well, it wasnât redemption for him but it would certainly be satisfying for you.
You motion for him to follow as youâre already walking towards your buildingâs front door, feeling a growing sense of catharsis.
You unlock your front door and step aside, waiting for Chrollo to also step in so you can shut your door. He takes his time looking around, taking in the details of your new home thatâs perfectly suited for you and you alone. Gesturing for him to sit, you set your things down on a nearby table and then sit across from him, making yourself comfortable.
âIâve hurt you to an unimaginable extent, I know.â he started as he looked at you with low eyes with a somewhat despondent look. You nodded in acknowledgment at his statement.
âI had been away from you much too long⌠lied to you for much too long.â
You nodded once again, already beginning to regret your decision.
âShe was temporary, y/n⌠although She shouldnât have happened at all.â
âWhat was Her name?â you asked, tilting your head. He looked at you, completely at a loss as he spoke slowly.
âI donât recall, y/n. Every time I think of what Her name might be I always think of yours.â
âIs that an attempt at making me feel better?â you sat up and crossed your legs as you studied his face.
âNot at all,â he replied with a hint of hesitation in his words.
âWhat are you here for exactly?
âA civil conversation. Perhaps⌠reconciliation,â he spoke slowly, clearly considering his words as they left through his teeth.
âYou want to reconcileâŚâ you said, getting up and walking to him slowly.
âBut of course, y/n.â
âSo you miss me.â
âI donât deserve you, but Iâve only ever thought of youâŚâ
âOnly me?â
âAlways you, my dearâŚâ he smiled as you stood beside him, eventually sitting in his lap and straddling him, your thumb brushing against his face. You leaned forward, your lips brushing his cheek as you placed a gentle kiss against his temple.
âYou lie as easily as you lay with whoever She was,â you whispered, feeling his shoulders tense. You placed another kiss on his temple as you felt his hands hover over your waist almost as if he was nervous to touch you.
âY/n my only intention is to right my wrongs.â he was whispering into your chest now as you placed more kisses onto him, feeling him melt into your barely-there touches. You moved your hips gently against him, running your fingers through his hair as you did so and taking note of all his minute reactions, to his low hums at your movements to how he properly squeezed your sides. You let one of your hands wander, ghosting over his chest and making its way down to palm him, a soft, desperate sigh escaping him and you held back another little smirk, wondering just how far you could take him.
You couldnât help but pity him, seemingly so needy for something he gave up so quickly.
âYou want to make things right?â you whispered, lifting his head so he could look you in the eye, properly now.
His hand squeezed your waist, uttering a chaste yes to you.
You took his lips in yours gently, and you watched his eyes flutter to a close as he leaned into it while you pulled back slowly.
âProve it to me.â
He pulled you back against him, lips never leaving yours with desperation-fueled kisses, keeping you tight within his grasp as he did so. Soft, warm lips occasionally parting to allow Chrollo to gently nip against your own, making you hum at his classic antics. The scent of his cologne and the faint taste of a classic drink from earlier left you feeling warm, nostalgic almost, of when he did this when he truly loved you. He squeezed at your sides as he broke the kiss to leave butterfly kisses against your shoulders and you sighed, feeling unsatisfied with his efforts to appease you. Stroking at him more you felt his chest rise and fall in bursts, clearly at your mercy while you palm him through his quickly tightening pants. You felt his fingers fiddle with the hem of your dress and you giggled, wondering what he wanted more of. - you, or the way you wrapped around him?
âChrolloâŚ. What are you willing to do, to show me you mean everything you say?â
His look was hazy, nothing in his eyes but need.
âEverything that it takes, to keep you to myself, my love.â his voice was low as he pressed more kisses into your skin, gently sucking on your skin ever so often.
You moved your hand from his face to his throat, keeping eye contact with him as you spoke,
âThen beg.â
He gave you a weak glare, more like a confused one as he seemed to accept your challenge and pick you up, a cheeky smile and a wicked look in your own eyes being the only response he got as you wrapped your thighs around his waist.
Satisfaction for you, and nothing for him.
He set you down on your bed, one hand attempting to undo the ribbons of your corset as the other traveled up your thighs, pressing his thumbs into your skin gently as his hands travel further to the waistband of your panties, his fingers wrapping around the fabric and tugged gently at them. He had since removed your corset and had moved to get your dress off of you, pulling it down around your hips and exposing your skin to the cool air of your apartment and an almost despondent yet eager gaze from Chrollo, hovering above you as it seemed his free hand wasnât sure where to go to first. He settled for resting his head on your chest for a moment before moving back to kiss you, softly at first before sealing that gap only to part for a moment, his tongue slipping inside making you hum as you pulled him closer against you so you could unbutton his shirt and feel his skin against yours. His fingers dipped to your folds, teasing your clit through fabric and causing you to break away from him, rolling your hips into his slow-moving fingers as your fingers ran through his hair, occasionally pulling at it as his lips made their way to your nipples. From gingerly placing kisses on them to his tongue passing over them, the hair on the back of your neck rising with each sensation. You were tempted to let your hands help him as well, knowing youâd only made it worse with how well you reacted to him.
But this wasnât about him, was it?
You pulled at his hair a little bit, forcing him to unlatch himself from your breast to look at you properly, although his hands toying with you between the thin fabric was making you feel dizzy.
âYou can do better than that, canât you?â you mustered, attempting to focus yourself on him as his fingers picked up the pace. He kissed at your wrist and continued downwards, freeing you of that lace fabric as his fingers made proper contact, only for him to revert to his painfully slow pace again.
You huffed, outwardly showing your impatience and he hummed, retracting his fingers to instead place butterfly kisses everywhere but where you needed them, making you squirm. Propping yourself up on your elbows, you glared at him as he slowly placed kisses on your inner thighs, although he seemed to be getting further away. Exasperation getting the best of you, you moved your hand to get yourself started seeing as Chrollo was keen on taking his sweet damn time, only for him to gently move your hand away with a casual smile. He started with his typical antics, judging how much he needed to adjust his pace based on how well you reacted to first touches. You couldnât deny the fact that he had skill, slow deep drags of his tongue right where you wanted it most. You wriggled against his face, the added bit of contact earning him little whines as he continued to let you satisfy yourself for a moment until he took gentle hold of your hips and held you still. His tongue elicited more little purrs of satisfaction from you, growing louder as he removed one hand from your hip to slide in two fingers, making you roll your hips with slight freedom. He was slow with his fingers too, only making them properly useful by occasionally curling them. He found a spot to subtly attack as he sucked on your clit for what felt like ages, your head feeling hot and muddled with wanting to make a mess of his face.
He always has to be slow, choosing a more sensual and drawn-out route when he decides he wants to please a lover. Choosing to change directions and pace based on how you react to him, picking up his pace if he can tell heâs tortured your enough, or slowing down when he feels like you ought to behave yourself.
All for the sake of him having control.
Growing impatient again amid your clouded thoughts your hand moved to his hair, almost like an anchor as you began to grind on his face again, coupled with his fingers and his tongue swirling around your sensitive bud you almost brought yourself there as that telltale pit formed in your core, and Chrollo knew better than to keep you waiting. As he hit both of the rights spots, you could only whine as you came on his face, unable to properly ride it out as Chrollo kept lapping at you causing your thighs to jolt as you kept a firm grip on his hair, all the sensations at once adding to your daze. He stopped after a moment or so and wiped the corner of his mouth, watching you collect yourself. He began to properly undress as he stood at the edge of the bed between your legs until you pushed him back with your foot, motioning for him to get on your bed. Surprisingly he didnât question it, clearly intrigued by whatever plan you had as he sat himself down. Managing to get yourself up you made him lay down properly, somewhat supported by the pillows that were there.
Brushing your hair out of your face, you straddled Chrollo once again, this time stroking him properly but slowly, all the while watching his eyes flutter at the touch. Heâd already made a mess of himself, pre-cum coating the palm of your hand and only getting worse. Heâd been straining against his pants for so long, doing such a good job giving you what you wanted, couldnât you give him something in return?
Not that he would get what he wanted, only what he deserved.
You moved down, enough so that your lips brushed against the tip of his throbbing cock, slowly running your tongue around the tip, swollen and sensitive from your earlier ministrations and would certainly get worse as you made eye contact with him. You allowed yourself to get lower, licking him from base to tip before taking him in your mouth right down to the base again, feeling his hips quiver beneath you. You hummed upon feeling his fingers in your hair, provoking you to work him harder, sticking your tongue out as you came off of him, giving him quick strokes before going back down again. From his position, the view he had of you must be stunning: face down ass up, head bobbing with fervency and skill giving him everything he expected out of you and only you.
Nobody, nobody gave it to him better than you did, and nobody ever will.
You could feel how close he was, how ready he was to paint the insides of your mouth white, but that would be too easy.
You stopped yet again and sat yourself up as Chrollo looked at you, watching you go back to straddling him. You lazily stroked him, watching his facial expression change from confused to intrigued even though his high was slowly slipping away from him. You sat further up on his chest and slowly aligned his member with your embarrassingly soaked entrance, your body betraying your intentions. You let him in slowly, feeling his eagerness in how his hands went straight for your hips with a tender but stressed grip knowing the way you felt around him was like no other - silken walls slick with a dangerously tight fit.
Rolling your hips in slow dizzying circles, you kept eye contact with him, subtly letting him know you had him right where you wanted himâŚ
At your mercy.
You leaned forward, your hands traveling up his chest as you moved your hips just enough to feel him twitch at your movements, his hands losing their tender hold in exchange for a rough one. Oh, how ready he was, right there in a matter of minutes, so easy.
You stopped, leaning closer to his face, close enough for his heavy breathing to tickle your face, âAlready, sweetheart? You wanna cum for me already?â you cooed, placing a teasing kiss on his parted lips. His eyes searched your own only for them to dip to your waist as you sat up, rolling those sweet circles with your hips again, one hand sliding up to wrap around his throat while you looked back, watching yourself slowly begin to bounce on him again with your grip on his throat tightening and relaxing as you felt your walls tighten around him, making you whimper at how full he could make you feel. You let go of his throat for a moment, allowing you to pick up your pace, your hands massaging your breasts while you moved and brought Chrollo closer while his hands roamed, his thumb finding your clit to tease it just enough. Your hips rocked and your pace became shaky as he applied pressure to his circles. Attempting to catch more friction from him in both spots, everything from pleasured little whimpers to gasps tumbled out of you as you grabbed his wrist and kept his hand fixed while his thumb still moved as you came around him, making you change your pace to a slow grind, which combined with a fierce tightness on your end made him hiss. In your slow pace, you took note of how his chest heaved and the grip on your hips attempted to make your body move.
Youâd cut him off from his high⌠how cute.
Your hand moved from his chest to his hand resting on your hip and you cocked your head to the side and gave him a sly smile, leaning forward and making your agonizing circles that way only to get a low groan out of him, knowing how sensitive youâd already made him and how it would only get worse with your antics. His high was leaving him at a record pace at this rate and he let you know, moving his hips underneath you in a last-ditch attempt at getting what he wanted with you. You feigned a pout of sympathy and moved both of his hands to your waist while you leaned close enough to brush his hair out of his face which had become a mess in your heated session.
You picked a different pace this time, a faster one that immediately had you both a shamefully loud mess with one hand on his shoulder while the other was wrapped around his throat, your chest brushing against his and your hips connecting with each other, desperation fueling both of your movements. Your lips moved to the side of his face, licking the tip of his ear while you worked him,
âAre you close for me, love? You wanna cum that badly?â
You could feel how eager he was with slamming his hips upward as you came down, even if you slowed your pace.
âDo not tease me, y/n, let me have youâŚâ was all he could form between huffs and groans, clearly hellbent on coating your walls.
âThatâs too bad, love,â you whispered as you pulled away from him, slamming your hips down and grounding yourself firmly in a rigid position, your free hand moving to his throat with both of your thumbs pressing down on his throat as you quickly nipped as his lips and placed a messy kiss on them and he only seemed to whine as you pressed down harder with both your hips and your thumbs.
âYou cum if I say so.â taunting him as you rolled your hips, noting the dazed look in his eyes as you brought that brutal pace back, low huffs and gasps from your shameful ex-lover only being drowned out by moans of your own as you focused on your own approaching high. It wasnât long before it came for you, hot and powerful enough to make your thighs shake in pleasure, knowing full well the tightness around him was terrible with how he couldnât enjoy it to its fullest extent. He was struggling to breathe properly, between the pace and denial of release with your hands wrapped around his throat.
A mess.
You were ready to start the process again, to have him suffer again when he squeezed your hips and you looked at him, his eyes low and face flushed.
âStopâŚâ was what he whispered and you smiled, slowly climbing off of him knowing youâd won.
You got up moments after, legs shaky as you headed to your bathroom to clean up for the night, purely satisfied in your efforts. You only took 10 minutes and came back, laying beside an absolutely wrecked Chrollo. You watched him get up and walk off to the bathroom, sighing as he did so.
You werenât too sure about what time it was, or what time he left your home. You had woken up, the sky being light enough for a new day but only suggesting early morning. Heâd left, not bothering to stay the night, perhaps having a change in heart in terms of trying to win you over.
Perhaps he believed it was done and over with, a night filled with satisfaction just for you.
AlthoughâŚ
Your satisfaction wasnât over, and neither was his torture.
A/N: so I wrote a nsfw follow up to Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fickle because it was mentioned~
NSFW, 18+!!!
Tags, 18+:Â teasing, riding, edging, overstimulation, blue-balling, oral and fingering (fem, receiving), mentions of drinking, a bit of plot, hate-fucking, blow-job, slight hand-job, choking (maybe more like asphyxiation)
[also available on AO3, https://archiveofourown.org/works/31770619 ]
This is 5.1k words, roughly.
This will also be continued (hopefully) in a third part
NSFW BELOW THE CUT....after some plot.
...Then Beg.
Itâs a wonder what a new view will do for your mind.
It's been just about a month now in your new home tucked away amongst the skyscrapers in the city, the neon lights from surrounding buildings find their way through your window and cast colorful shadows throughout the room. Looking down onto the street there were only specks of people passing by, moving with and against the traffic, towards and away from music and more adventures, a city very much on the move below you. As much as you were in the heart of a lively city, your life had never felt calmer, and you had so much less to worry about in terms of others, and more time to focus on yourself.
PerhapsâŚ. It had been a bit brash to up and leave your previous home all because of someone else's doing, someone elseâs inability to be faithful, but what good would it have done if you stayed there and let him talk his way back into your bed?
He was already in someone elseâs bed, and it wasnât like he needed two of them.
Besides, you had your jewels now, your fine clothing, and your treasures on the account of your work. You were no longer tied to someone who couldnât be bothered acknowledging he was tied to you.
Enough about him, what did he matter?
Leaving the living room, you made your way over to your closet, running your fingers over various fabrics, the lights from outside still spilling into your rooms, adding interesting hues to your clothes. Your hand stopped over a sleek black dress, a satin one with a dip in the front, a classic satin slip dressâŚ
His favorite one.
Even though he wasnât in your room, your home, or even in the building, you could feel him wandering your city during long nights, his presence lingering in bars and restaurants, the sound of his voice bouncing between late-night conversations fading throughout the city. Sometimes youâd feel his eyes on you during the day on your way to work, catch a glimpse of what you thought was his hair in the aisles of stores, feel his hands on you, gently, while you tried on clothes in little boutiques, knowing how much he would love to see you in this dress, that corset, those boots, that set of laceâŚ
He was always near, always lingering, even if you shut him out.
You took the dress from its hanger, stripping yourself of your casual clothes and putting the dress on, admiring the little dress and how it sat on you, sleek yet simple⌠although it left a bit to be desired. You pulled a pair of shoes from your closet, black strappy heels that laced up around your ankles, doing a little spin in the mirror, acknowledging what a wonderful catch you were.
And yet, something felt missing from your little outfit, something to tie it all togetherâŚ
You went back to your closet, flipping through coats, belts, waist beads, tights, and nothing seemed to make the outfit the outfit. You scanned your closet, up and down for about ten minutes before your eyes rested on a lace corset and you took from the rack it sat on and slipped it over your waist, going back to the mirror and inspecting the damage you could cause.
You smiled, just for yourself, knowing you were as deadly as theyâd ever come.
You werenât too sure what possessed you to go out at such an hour, but tonight felt like the night to explore the city and make connections and be free for just a little whileâŚ
Maybe even cause some problems.
You somewhat knew why you were out in the city, but you also partially didnât. You knew it was for him, hoping he would see you in your glory and grovel for you as a result of his pathetic choices, wishing it was him instead of a nobody seeing you in that dress and taking it off of you in the darkness of your apartment, that favorite dress of his, that stunning black dress he loved.
Conversely, you wondered why you cared at all. Werenât you the one who cut him out of your life abruptly at the drop of a phone call, packing you and your things away and running off to a new city, severing the connection as quickly and deeply as possible? Werenât you over it, or at least at peace with yourself, knowing you deserved better than what heâd done? Why were you compelled to go out in the naive hope that maybe he would be there and cast even an absent glance in your direction, almost like a shred of hopeâŚ
You scowled to yourself, the somewhat suppressed turmoil within yourself feeling childish in a way, being at odds with yourself over a disloyal thief with some fame.
Pathetic.
You could say you picked a bar at random, or rather on a feeling that pulled you towards this bar, but deciding which of the two reasons was the real one was not on your agenda tonight.
Almost on cue, pairs of eyes rested on you from all directions, lingering on the straps of the dress, the corset, the heels, everything. You had that bar by the throat tonight.
Sliding into a seat you ordered a drink, something light to start you off for hopefully an interesting night. It wasnât long before someone sat beside you, tossing a sly glance in your direction every so often as they too ordered a drink. He was an average everyday man, nothing special or striking as he attempted to puff out his chest as he ordered a Vieux Carre, finally turning himself halfway towards you. Frankly, you made no efforts on your part of the conversation, not even bothering to look at him as you âtalkedâ, which was mostly him talking about his success in his business⌠or his practice⌠or was it his firm?
Heâd gone on for a few minutes, your clear lack of interest doing nothing to deter his rambling when another man pointed it out to him that you werenât interested, telling him to get lost. You only watched the two bicker out of the corner of your eye, while another man sat on your free side, scoffing about how they were âacting so childish, one trying to be a knight in shining armor for someone who deserves an armyâ.
As if he was even on neighborhood watch.
You paid him no mind either, only curt responses and the occasional smile and huff, focusing on your drink as he too attempted what the previous two had failed at. This was the pattern for about 30 minutes, a trail of desperation trying to find its climax with you, only for hopes to be struck down with an icy glance and a quiet sip from your drink. Youâd heard it all, from growing up in shacks and small towns to living in penthouses with offshore bank accounts, theyâd all come out of the woodworks with you in their sights.
One was currently talking your ear off about the latest political drama when you felt him.
He was here.
You could feel his eyes lingering on the dress, his dress. His favorite dress.
You only sat up and fixed yourself in your seat and shifted your eyes, only offering a sideways glance.
There he is.
Seated in the corner of the bar, the low lights and dull hums of conversation gave him cover as his eyes wandered on your figure. You slowly brought your eyes back forward and ordered another drink, another light thing to sip on. You turned to the current disaster sitting beside you and decided to at least put a little more effort in the conversation, offering a honeyed smile and a giggle where you could, asking dumb little questions and leaning forward, play up that interest, sweetheart.
All the while of showing this stranger all the interest in the world, you had cast your disinterest to someone else, someone who wanted your attention. You could feel it in his aura, you could feel he was trying to keep it at bay, the desire to make himself known to you.
How pitiful, wanting something you so carelessly threw away.
You turned your body to face this stranger, effectively turning your back to Chrollo.
You felt his eyes burn into your back, and you bit your lip to suppress a sneer, earning you a sly smile from your current attention holder. Alas, your little pawn for power-play had somewhere to be the next morning, lamenting on how he had to leave you so early when he didnât want to, quickly talking about how he loved the conversation you two were having. He fears he may never see you again in such a large city.
You borrow a pen from a bartender and scribble your number on a napkin just as the stranger gets up. He beams at you and gives you his own, leaving in a matter of minutes.
He wonât be too upset with that burner number, will he? Tragic.
You waited a little while, finishing your drink before getting up from your spot, giving the bartender a tip before casting a slick glance behind you as you sauntered over towards the exit. You felt that aura spill out, a hush falling over the bar as the only sound heard was the door creaking on its hinges.
He knew that you knew he was there. And you ignored him.
Walking along the streets towards your home, you could still feel his eyes on you, on your legs, right up to how that corset sat on you.
Everything he threw away, everything he missed, and more.
You stopped at a crosswalk, only minutes away from home and you checked your phone, taking interest in your phone contacts and social media accounts. He was close⌠dangerously close. Was he⌠hesitant? So out of character.
You only gave him a half turn and an unamused look, looking straight through him in a way you never had before. The lights of the city casting strange shadows and shapes on his face while casting doubt in your mind that the look in his eyes was a good one. You were only met with a look between desperation and determination as you stared at each other on the street in a city that shouldâve been too big for him to pinpoint you and everything he wanted.
You turned to leave, prepared to cross the street and be lost to him again right as he called your name.
âY/n.â quietly, but he meant it in a way.
How bold of you, Chrollo. How bold.
You turned, not offering an answer but only a slow tilt of your head. He stepped closer as his aura met with your own and if it was not obvious before, his need for you was embarrassingly apparent.
âYou look stunning as always, y/n.â his eyes lingered and at the same time didnât, flitting from one area of your figure to the next, the hem of your dress, the folds in the cut, the reflections in the fabric against the city lights.
âI know.â was your only answer, unmoved by his simple compliments.
He only smiled as he found your eyes again, finally prying them away from your hips.
âI would like to talk, a civil discussion if youâd like,â he stated as best as he could, watching your face for potential rejection.
Heâs getting himself in hot water.
âTalk about what? Whatâs there to say?â you asked, body itching to go home already.
âI left a lot of things unsaid when I shouldnât have, y/nâ he put on that classic sweet voice of his, a voice that would always put you at ease⌠when it shouldnât have.
âYou should have said it on the phone.â you finally turned to walk away as he spoke again, this time making you stop.
âI owe you an explanation, y/n. At least let me give you that.â
You looked over your shoulder, unable to deny him this one moment of redemption.
Well, it wasnât redemption for him but it would certainly be satisfying for you.
You motion for him to follow as youâre already walking towards your buildingâs front door, feeling a growing sense of catharsis.
You unlock your front door and step aside, waiting for Chrollo to also step in so you can shut your door. He takes his time looking around, taking in the details of your new home thatâs perfectly suited for you and you alone. Gesturing for him to sit, you set your things down on a nearby table and then sit across from him, making yourself comfortable.
âIâve hurt you to an unimaginable extent, I know.â he started as he looked at you with low eyes with a somewhat despondent look. You nodded in acknowledgment at his statement.
âI had been away from you much too long⌠lied to you for much too long.â
You nodded once again, already beginning to regret your decision.
âShe was temporary, y/n⌠although She shouldnât have happened at all.â
âWhat was Her name?â you asked, tilting your head. He looked at you, completely at a loss as he spoke slowly.
âI donât recall, y/n. Every time I think of what Her name might be I always think of yours.â
âIs that an attempt at making me feel better?â you sat up and crossed your legs as you studied his face.
âNot at all,â he replied with a hint of hesitation in his words.
âWhat are you here for exactly?
âA civil conversation. Perhaps⌠reconciliation,â he spoke slowly, clearly considering his words as they left through his teeth.
âYou want to reconcileâŚâ you said, getting up and walking to him slowly.
âBut of course, y/n.â
âSo you miss me.â
âI donât deserve you, but Iâve only ever thought of youâŚâ
âOnly me?â
âAlways you, my dearâŚâ he smiled as you stood beside him, eventually sitting in his lap and straddling him, your thumb brushing against his face. You leaned forward, your lips brushing his cheek as you placed a gentle kiss against his temple.
âYou lie as easily as you lay with whoever She was,â you whispered, feeling his shoulders tense. You placed another kiss on his temple as you felt his hands hover over your waist almost as if he was nervous to touch you.
âY/n my only intention is to right my wrongs.â he was whispering into your chest now as you placed more kisses onto him, feeling him melt into your barely-there touches. You moved your hips gently against him, running your fingers through his hair as you did so and taking note of all his minute reactions, to his low hums at your movements to how he properly squeezed your sides. You let one of your hands wander, ghosting over his chest and making its way down to palm him, a soft, desperate sigh escaping him and you held back another little smirk, wondering just how far you could take him.
You couldnât help but pity him, seemingly so needy for something he gave up so quickly.
âYou want to make things right?â you whispered, lifting his head so he could look you in the eye, properly now.
His hand squeezed your waist, uttering a chaste yes to you.
You took his lips in yours gently, and you watched his eyes flutter to a close as he leaned into it while you pulled back slowly.
âProve it to me.â
He pulled you back against him, lips never leaving yours with desperation-fueled kisses, keeping you tight within his grasp as he did so. Soft, warm lips occasionally parting to allow Chrollo to gently nip against your own, making you hum at his classic antics. The scent of his cologne and the faint taste of a classic drink from earlier left you feeling warm, nostalgic almost, of when he did this when he truly loved you. He squeezed at your sides as he broke the kiss to leave butterfly kisses against your shoulders and you sighed, feeling unsatisfied with his efforts to appease you. Stroking at him more you felt his chest rise and fall in bursts, clearly at your mercy while you palm him through his quickly tightening pants. You felt his fingers fiddle with the hem of your dress and you giggled, wondering what he wanted more of. - you, or the way you wrapped around him?
âChrolloâŚ. What are you willing to do, to show me you mean everything you say?â
His look was hazy, nothing in his eyes but need.
âEverything that it takes, to keep you to myself, my love.â his voice was low as he pressed more kisses into your skin, gently sucking on your skin ever so often.
You moved your hand from his face to his throat, keeping eye contact with him as you spoke,
âThen beg.â
He gave you a weak glare, more like a confused one as he seemed to accept your challenge and pick you up, a cheeky smile and a wicked look in your own eyes being the only response he got as you wrapped your thighs around his waist.
Satisfaction for you, and nothing for him.
He set you down on your bed, one hand attempting to undo the ribbons of your corset as the other traveled up your thighs, pressing his thumbs into your skin gently as his hands travel further to the waistband of your panties, his fingers wrapping around the fabric and tugged gently at them. He had since removed your corset and had moved to get your dress off of you, pulling it down around your hips and exposing your skin to the cool air of your apartment and an almost despondent yet eager gaze from Chrollo, hovering above you as it seemed his free hand wasnât sure where to go to first. He settled for resting his head on your chest for a moment before moving back to kiss you, softly at first before sealing that gap only to part for a moment, his tongue slipping inside making you hum as you pulled him closer against you so you could unbutton his shirt and feel his skin against yours. His fingers dipped to your folds, teasing your clit through fabric and causing you to break away from him, rolling your hips into his slow-moving fingers as your fingers ran through his hair, occasionally pulling at it as his lips made their way to your nipples. From gingerly placing kisses on them to his tongue passing over them, the hair on the back of your neck rising with each sensation. You were tempted to let your hands help him as well, knowing youâd only made it worse with how well you reacted to him.
But this wasnât about him, was it?
You pulled at his hair a little bit, forcing him to unlatch himself from your breast to look at you properly, although his hands toying with you between the thin fabric was making you feel dizzy.
âYou can do better than that, canât you?â you mustered, attempting to focus yourself on him as his fingers picked up the pace. He kissed at your wrist and continued downwards, freeing you of that lace fabric as his fingers made proper contact, only for him to revert to his painfully slow pace again.
You huffed, outwardly showing your impatience and he hummed, retracting his fingers to instead place butterfly kisses everywhere but where you needed them, making you squirm. Propping yourself up on your elbows, you glared at him as he slowly placed kisses on your inner thighs, although he seemed to be getting further away. Exasperation getting the best of you, you moved your hand to get yourself started seeing as Chrollo was keen on taking his sweet damn time, only for him to gently move your hand away with a casual smile. He started with his typical antics, judging how much he needed to adjust his pace based on how well you reacted to first touches. You couldnât deny the fact that he had skill, slow deep drags of his tongue right where you wanted it most. You wriggled against his face, the added bit of contact earning him little whines as he continued to let you satisfy yourself for a moment until he took gentle hold of your hips and held you still. His tongue elicited more little purrs of satisfaction from you, growing louder as he removed one hand from your hip to slide in two fingers, making you roll your hips with slight freedom. He was slow with his fingers too, only making them properly useful by occasionally curling them. He found a spot to subtly attack as he sucked on your clit for what felt like ages, your head feeling hot and muddled with wanting to make a mess of his face.
He always has to be slow, choosing a more sensual and drawn-out route when he decides he wants to please a lover. Choosing to change directions and pace based on how you react to him, picking up his pace if he can tell heâs tortured your enough, or slowing down when he feels like you ought to behave yourself.
All for the sake of him having control.
Growing impatient again amid your clouded thoughts your hand moved to his hair, almost like an anchor as you began to grind on his face again, coupled with his fingers and his tongue swirling around your sensitive bud you almost brought yourself there as that telltale pit formed in your core, and Chrollo knew better than to keep you waiting. As he hit both of the rights spots, you could only whine as you came on his face, unable to properly ride it out as Chrollo kept lapping at you causing your thighs to jolt as you kept a firm grip on his hair, all the sensations at once adding to your daze. He stopped after a moment or so and wiped the corner of his mouth, watching you collect yourself. He began to properly undress as he stood at the edge of the bed between your legs until you pushed him back with your foot, motioning for him to get on your bed. Surprisingly he didnât question it, clearly intrigued by whatever plan you had as he sat himself down. Managing to get yourself up you made him lay down properly, somewhat supported by the pillows that were there.
Brushing your hair out of your face, you straddled Chrollo once again, this time stroking him properly but slowly, all the while watching his eyes flutter at the touch. Heâd already made a mess of himself, pre-cum coating the palm of your hand and only getting worse. Heâd been straining against his pants for so long, doing such a good job giving you what you wanted, couldnât you give him something in return?
Not that he would get what he wanted, only what he deserved.
You moved down, enough so that your lips brushed against the tip of his throbbing cock, slowly running your tongue around the tip, swollen and sensitive from your earlier ministrations and would certainly get worse as you made eye contact with him. You allowed yourself to get lower, licking him from base to tip before taking him in your mouth right down to the base again, feeling his hips quiver beneath you. You hummed upon feeling his fingers in your hair, provoking you to work him harder, sticking your tongue out as you came off of him, giving him quick strokes before going back down again. From his position, the view he had of you must be stunning: face down ass up, head bobbing with fervency and skill giving him everything he expected out of you and only you.
Nobody, nobody gave it to him better than you did, and nobody ever will.
You could feel how close he was, how ready he was to paint the insides of your mouth white, but that would be too easy.
You stopped yet again and sat yourself up as Chrollo looked at you, watching you go back to straddling him. You lazily stroked him, watching his facial expression change from confused to intrigued even though his high was slowly slipping away from him. You sat further up on his chest and slowly aligned his member with your embarrassingly soaked entrance, your body betraying your intentions. You let him in slowly, feeling his eagerness in how his hands went straight for your hips with a tender but stressed grip knowing the way you felt around him was like no other - silken walls slick with a dangerously tight fit.
Rolling your hips in slow dizzying circles, you kept eye contact with him, subtly letting him know you had him right where you wanted himâŚ
At your mercy.
You leaned forward, your hands traveling up his chest as you moved your hips just enough to feel him twitch at your movements, his hands losing their tender hold in exchange for a rough one. Oh, how ready he was, right there in a matter of minutes, so easy.
You stopped, leaning closer to his face, close enough for his heavy breathing to tickle your face, âAlready, sweetheart? You wanna cum for me already?â you cooed, placing a teasing kiss on his parted lips. His eyes searched your own only for them to dip to your waist as you sat up, rolling those sweet circles with your hips again, one hand sliding up to wrap around his throat while you looked back, watching yourself slowly begin to bounce on him again with your grip on his throat tightening and relaxing as you felt your walls tighten around him, making you whimper at how full he could make you feel. You let go of his throat for a moment, allowing you to pick up your pace, your hands massaging your breasts while you moved and brought Chrollo closer while his hands roamed, his thumb finding your clit to tease it just enough. Your hips rocked and your pace became shaky as he applied pressure to his circles. Attempting to catch more friction from him in both spots, everything from pleasured little whimpers to gasps tumbled out of you as you grabbed his wrist and kept his hand fixed while his thumb still moved as you came around him, making you change your pace to a slow grind, which combined with a fierce tightness on your end made him hiss. In your slow pace, you took note of how his chest heaved and the grip on your hips attempted to make your body move.
Youâd cut him off from his high⌠how cute.
Your hand moved from his chest to his hand resting on your hip and you cocked your head to the side and gave him a sly smile, leaning forward and making your agonizing circles that way only to get a low groan out of him, knowing how sensitive youâd already made him and how it would only get worse with your antics. His high was leaving him at a record pace at this rate and he let you know, moving his hips underneath you in a last-ditch attempt at getting what he wanted with you. You feigned a pout of sympathy and moved both of his hands to your waist while you leaned close enough to brush his hair out of his face which had become a mess in your heated session.
You picked a different pace this time, a faster one that immediately had you both a shamefully loud mess with one hand on his shoulder while the other was wrapped around his throat, your chest brushing against his and your hips connecting with each other, desperation fueling both of your movements. Your lips moved to the side of his face, licking the tip of his ear while you worked him,
âAre you close for me, love? You wanna cum that badly?â
You could feel how eager he was with slamming his hips upward as you came down, even if you slowed your pace.
âDo not tease me, y/n, let me have youâŚâ was all he could form between huffs and groans, clearly hellbent on coating your walls.
âThatâs too bad, love,â you whispered as you pulled away from him, slamming your hips down and grounding yourself firmly in a rigid position, your free hand moving to his throat with both of your thumbs pressing down on his throat as you quickly nipped as his lips and placed a messy kiss on them and he only seemed to whine as you pressed down harder with both your hips and your thumbs.
âYou cum if I say so.â taunting him as you rolled your hips, noting the dazed look in his eyes as you brought that brutal pace back, low huffs and gasps from your shameful ex-lover only being drowned out by moans of your own as you focused on your own approaching high. It wasnât long before it came for you, hot and powerful enough to make your thighs shake in pleasure, knowing full well the tightness around him was terrible with how he couldnât enjoy it to its fullest extent. He was struggling to breathe properly, between the pace and denial of release with your hands wrapped around his throat.
A mess.
You were ready to start the process again, to have him suffer again when he squeezed your hips and you looked at him, his eyes low and face flushed.
âStopâŚâ was what he whispered and you smiled, slowly climbing off of him knowing youâd won.
You got up moments after, legs shaky as you headed to your bathroom to clean up for the night, purely satisfied in your efforts. You only took 10 minutes and came back, laying beside an absolutely wrecked Chrollo. You watched him get up and walk off to the bathroom, sighing as he did so.
You werenât too sure about what time it was, or what time he left your home. You had woken up, the sky being light enough for a new day but only suggesting early morning. Heâd left, not bothering to stay the night, perhaps having a change in heart in terms of trying to win you over.
Perhaps he believed it was done and over with, a night filled with satisfaction just for you.
AlthoughâŚ
Your satisfaction wasnât over, and neither was his torture.
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hiii! i love your work and I really admire the way you write đđ, so I couldn't resist making a request hehe. if it's not too much of a hassle, i'd like 11 or 22 for Illumi, please. thank you very much in advance, i send you a lot of love from Madrid uwuwu đđđđ (and sorry for my bad English đđ)
your english is wonderful >:( also MADRID!!! I wanna go to Madrid...
[Prompt #22 "Stop Being Seductive!" "I Was Being Myself, But Okay"] [Fluff and a bit of Crack because I couldnt help it]
A Date?
You stood on the outskirts of a private estate, ž of the view of the mansion obscured by a hedge of lush green arborvitae rising above a brick wall about twice your height. Not that you would have been able to see much if the obstructions werenât there, it was the dead of night and the mansion only provided faint specks of light in the distance, with the scattered decorative lamp posts offering faint halos of light every few feet, but still managing to leave you shrouded in darkness.
Frankly, you had no reason to be there; in the mansion, near it, or outside of it. You had been asked to accompany Illumi on a job, and although this had slowly become a frequent occurrence, it always puzzled you every time. The first time heâd asked you, he had essentially appeared in your living room and asked you to come with him âsomewhereâ and upon asking him to clarify, he followed with again asking you to come with him, this time saying to join him on a job. You had been ready to participate, but he ended up leaving you standing around nowhere near the actual action, and would then return to you after 30 minutes and would bring you home. Now, this had been about the tenth time heâd asked you to join him on a job, knowing very well heâd have you standing around waiting for him. This was only made stranger by the fact that not only did he have someone that he did jobs with (a questionable jester), but you had actually actively participated in jobs with Illumi, so why Illumi had changed your position from job partner to benching you. In his defense, you had failed to ask him why he had been doing this lately, rather, you had been attempting for the last 3 or so meetings to figure it out yourself. There were no logical reasons as to why he dragged you to his missions but his âwork partnerâ, as Illumi so endearingly referred to, had once run into you while you were waiting on the sidelines for Illumi and given you a strange bit of insight in passing.
He had questioned why Illumi had you waiting out there all by your lonesome, knowing how much Illumi cared for you. Cared for you? That was an interesting bit of news⌠Illumi had never made it apparent that he so much as a thought of you other than a work associate, let alone that he âcaredâ for you beyond that. As this jester had left you standing in the dark, a final passing comment of âwhat a strange way to bond with someone you fancyâ caught you off guard.
A way to bond?
Someone you fancy?
Granted this was Illumi Zoldyck you were talking about, and he was dense like fruitcake in terms of making bonds and connections other than things pertaining strictly to work, but the thought of him fancying you and trying to bond with you made your gears turn.
On your end, youâd done a surprisingly good job at keeping your own feelings towards Illumi at bay, weary about how he would react to the prospect of someone fancying him. You couldnât really lie to yourself when you thought about him. One would definitely call him strange, which was an understatement in most circumstances, but something about his strangeness and lack of awareness for social cues was oddly endearing. Little quirks about how he liked his tea or the occasional indulgence he took part in, or his particular hair care routine always managed to captivate you. Along with his (albeit something he was at a default) honesty and genuine answers, and his offhand compliments, you struggled to keep yourself together at his awkwardness. Not to mention, he was simply physically stunning, while some would call him rather plain. It might be his plainness that intrigued you, but it wasnât like itâd be wrong to think so. Even if you felt this way about him, he had no way of knowing, and you had no inclination that it was reciprocated. Heâd never made it known about having feelings for you, so you wondered if the two of you were playing an evenly matched waiting game with each other at this juncture.
Why would he feel the same anyway? Itâs not like you were eccentric like that questionable jester Illumi was friends with, or that you came from an affluent family of assassins⌠you provided no value to Illumi other than⌠company.
âLet's go.â
You shifted your eyes around, noticing Illumi standing beside you, his eyes burning into yours. How long had he been standing there�
You nodded, picking yourself up off the wall, and began walking back the way you two had come, only for Illumi to stand in front of you and stop you.
âThis way.â he pointed behind you and you turned, looking at hazy streetlamps down the way.
âBut home isâ you pointed past him in the opposite direction, âthis way.â
âI am bringing you somewhere. This way.â he turned you around and began walking further away from home with you in tow.
âWhere are we goinâ Illu?â you asked, wondering what was past the dark street if anything at all.
âThe park,â he answered, still walking, his eyes straight ahead.
Wasnât it around 1am? What could be at the park at this hour?
Upon arriving at the park, the park was equally as dark as the street by the mansion, and since the scarce lights in the park were so dim, it only served to make the park feel barren, especially with only you and Illumi here.
Heâd stopped by a bench situated in front of a small pond, the water gently breaking the silence whilst reflecting soft moonlight, and you couldnât help but get lost in your thoughts while staring at the dark pond until Illumi called your name.
You didnât answer, you only let your distant gaze fall on him, taking him in one aspect at a time. Everything, everything was perfect about him, regardless if that was what he was âcreatedâ to be or if your thoughts about him made you feel like he was perfect. What had his friend been thinking, âsomeone you fancyâ? Compared to Illumi you were nowhere near perfection, you still had so much work to do on yourself and perfecting your trade, yet the hint that Illumi felt something towards you felt absolutely absurd when you realized what you were up against. Apart from living up to his family's expectations, would you be able to live up to his? Highly unlikely, at least to you.
There you stood, brooding at Illumi who was merely standing there looking stunning, although there was rarely a time he didnât.
âY/n.â
Nothing out of you yet again, still brooding.
âY/n.â
Again, calling out to you like youâd left the scene as he stared at you as you stared at him.
âY/n you are staring.â
You scowled, finally looking away, huffing as you did so.
âYouâre beingâŚ.seductive. Stop being seductive!â you muttered, attempting to inspect the tops of your shoes.
You glanced at him and he blinked, big eyes holding a sense of genuine confusion as he slowly answered.
âI was not.â
âYes, you are!â
âI was being myself, but okay y/n.â
You sighed, giving him a glare as you sat down on the bench, feeling somewhat defeated and wholly embarrassed for attempting to call him out⌠on seductiveness.
âWhyâd you bring me here anyways?â you asked, kicking at the rocks on the ground.
âA date.â
You turned your head fast enough you felt the strain in your neck from doing so. Eyes wide and full of confusion, you attempted to string a coherent sentence together all while giving him a bewildered look.
âDate? Now?â
âYes. This is a date.â
You cocked your head to the side and squinted at him.
As smart as he is, he seems to be as thick as mince when it comes to datesâŚ
âIllumi this isnât⌠a date.â
âYes, it is.â
âWeâre sitting in a park, Illu. In the middle of the night.â
âDid you prefer the previous occurrences as dates?â
âWhat previous occurrencesâŚâ you whispered, wondering how he could become vaguer and vaguer with his view of dates.
âMy missions.â
âThose were dates?!â you slumped down in your spot, rubbing your face with your hands.
âWere you not aware.â
âThose arenât dates! You never even asked me on a date!â
âI asked you to come with me.â
âThat's asking to tag along! Not a date!â
He was silent for a moment, looking at you with a classically vacant look before speaking up.
âI will take you on a date.â
âThatâs a nice sentiment, Lumi, but when? And why?â
âTomorrow. I like you.â
Slack-jawed but somewhat satisfied (courtesy of his honesty, no matter how jarring) you nodded slowly, wondering if that jester wasnât so wrong after all.
âOkay.â
âGood.â
He took a seat by you, watching the water as well. You never could tell what he was thinking, and more often than not youâd rather not find out, but whatever those thoughts were now⌠he seemed calmer, almost or at least at ease. Whether that was due to your acceptance of a (proper) date or not was something youâd maybe find out later, but that was of little concern right now.
The main concern would be finding a last-minute date outfit⌠and hoping it wasnât the park during the day.