Ellie Caroline

So I've gone over what Jensen's top notch acting actually meant as in Dean's response/reaction to the confession. Here's more. I realize I took a lot of liberties in the interpretation; but isn't that the whole point of acting? To make us see what may lie beneath the surface?

Like I sad in my previous post, Dean was on the verge of crying. And he spilled once he turned around. Because it hit him.

Let me explain (gifs not mine)...(also sorry for my messy English, I'm not native and it's like 10 pm here)

This is Cas after Dean told him the "Don't do this" line:

What he's saying here, with the unwavering look and slight head shake is " I am doing this, I have to do this". He gives Dean a rare moments to actually reflect on what he just said. Keep in mind Death is banging on the door, so these are truly just mere moments.

And Dean doesn't want to process, to believe. You can see him swallow hard, his brows furrow, and his jaw clench, it's a slightest movement, as in "No, no..."

He keeps fighting it, the dread of the reality he's faced with. And then raises the eyebrows, because he sees Cas. Cas seeing something. And Dean hopes for a different way, but the look in his eyes says it. He fears what he'll see.

He turns around. And that's it. The Empty. He can't deny what's happening any longer.

It's happening. And THAT's when he starts spilling, his eyes glistening.

When he sees, when he knows that this is it. He almost mouths something; as if saying

"No..." to this finality. His look changes. He's more focused, more present.

You can see him take a breath. And he turns to Cas as he clings onto the last moment. Now or never.

"Cas-" Cas I...?

You can see the momentum in his eyes, the rush, the utter panic. The importance of what he has to say, even though he may not even be sure of the words. Hence the "silent" I...

He never did say it. Cas didn't let him. He says his goodbye and before Dean can even tell him what he needed to tell him, what he so desperately wanted to tell him...

Even without the words, you can see the confusion; the shock in Dean's eyes. He hadn't expected Cas to take this last chance from him.

(looking at this gif in loop is hilarious to be honest)

And then, he's gone.

And here, ladies and gentlemen, you can see it manifested. The shock, or more so, the dread he has been feeling. His eyes are wet and wide. He's shaking and it's not from the fall. The breath he takes in is shaky too. He's panicked and shaken and he starts to break. But mostly...

He's devastated. He's devastated because Cas disappeared before his eyes. And he couldn't do anything. He couldn't say anything. You can see him lean back slightly, as in to lean onto the wall. As in away from the place where Cas was. Where there's nothing now.

When we see him again, he's still stunned, unmoving.

And when Sam call's him, it's a literal wake-up call. That it's all real. You can see him look up, as if allarmed, as if to check if this reality is truly happening. He looks around, rather slowly, as if he expects something, anything; but the room is empty. And it hits. It hits much harder than he hits his head on the wall.

You can see it. The slightest look of "admittance" before he blinks twice, probably in a futile effort to stop the tears. We all do this, unconciously. He swallows heavily, leaning back. It doesn't help and so he breaks, his face hiding in his hands. He sobbs.

(me too, Dean; me too)

So that's when he admits it all. Not just what happened, or that it did indeed happen, but HOW it happened.

But that's for another post.

So try telling me Jensen did a bad job, I dare you.

Let me know if you agree/disagree or what's your take from the scene :)

– I like to think none of this would have worked out if you weren’t, at heart, just a little bit of a good person. – And if you weren’t, deep down, just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing.