Greetings to you all,
I am Count Cain Hargreaves,
pleasure is all mine I assure you. I do hope that you enjoy your stay while you are here.
Please be cautious however, there are always demons and incubi lurking in the shadows that are always willing to pounce upon and take advantage of the unwary.
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This is an independent rp blog for Cain Hargreaves from Kaori Yuki's Godchild.
I track the CountCain tag.
M!A: None.
OOC - Important information (Partial Hiatus) and... not so important.
I am fully aware I have been a shitty mun these past few months and I feel utterly awful because of it; especially since Cain is a character that means so much to me as a person and a fan in general. And to know I have let so many followers down (evident in the great many that I lost) and, most importantly, friends I let down tears at me more then I can admit.
This summer has been rough and has taken everything I have as a person to keep myself together, and this is why the entire summer the moments when my muses were working were limited at best. Nonetheless, I am a stubborn person and I will get to full fledged activity on here ASAP and maybe then, with the guilt gone I will be able to enjoy roleplaying this wonderful character again.
Much to my regret this blog will be on partial hiatus till the 27th since my brother is in town. He is a... high maintenance person to say the least and I have not seen him since December so I do need to spend time with him till he leaves. Since he is high maintenance I cannot be on much during the day but I can get to a few replies in the morning and night each day.
As always, I am sorry but I will make things right to all of my roleplay partners and friends on here, I just hope you all forgive me.
Some of you may be wondering "why the hell is this mun petrified and apologizing all the damn time?" and may think I am a wimp because of it; but there is a reason...
From the age of thirteen till eighteen I roleplayed on just one site and it was the most wondrous and creative time I have ever had. It was when my love for writing flourished and I found kinship in long-distance friends whilst struggling with depression. I made a plethora of close friends over those years and felt the sheer excitement to sit down for a few hours each day and focus my mind elsewhere, somewhere that was healthier then my own situation. And it was all utterly fantastic!!
That is until the end of high school and beginning of college (aka 3-4 years ago) when people, I thought were close friends began to berate and tear into me as a person whenever I did not reply to our rps when they saw fit; I had to be on every single day, no excuses or they willingly treated me like a piece of shit until I begged forgiveness. It was during this time that even strangers that I just began talking to and rping with began to call me a "fucking whore" and I should go kill myself by hanging myself in my room just because my character hugged a character that was not theirs.
Hence something that had once helped me during depression was now causing a major relapse but roleplaying on this site was all I knew and it had become a staple in my life, a crutch. Well, after one day of berating I just cracked. I could not bare the thought of roleplaying again. I shut down my sites without warning and cut off ties with my so called "friends"; not that there was much to cut off, they never asked after my well being or texted me after that which proved how much our "friendship" or my presence meant to them.
This is just a summary but these are the reasons I could not publicly roleplay for over a year and a half. It took all my inner strength just to try roleplaying on here by making Cain... and I admit I am still scared. That is why I am afraid to come back or even say I am sorry but I feel I have to despite it.
But please know Tumblr has been such a welcoming environment, such a complete change from the only roleplaying experience I had prior and I am so immensely grateful for it. I just wanted you all to know why I apologize so much or take a while to come back sometimes because after all that it has been instinctual for me to feel so much anxiety when I miss just one day of roleplaying on here, let alone a month!
Thank you to all my friends, rp partners and followers on here for making this experience so wonderful thus far and proving that roleplaying can be a fun relaxing inclusive activity.
Really, thank you so much. You all are just simply brilliant.
xoxoxoxo
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āYou did?ā A small smile graced his lips. āIt was rather suddenā¦. I am not sure why I acted on itā¦..ā He blushed, biting his lower lip. Cain looked so cute when he blushedā¦.. He took a deep breath before asking his next question. āMay I kiss you again?ā
Cain nodded at him and smiled, "I actually did, I cannot say why but I enjoyed it more then I can express," he replied watching him with a compassionate gaze so Cheslock would not get nervous and shy away, "it just felt right." He took one of the male's hands with him wondering what the Violet Prefect would do if he learned that the new student was kissing his fag; it was hard for him to say. He pushed those thoughts aside and gave a nod of his head, "yes please," he murmured leaning to meet his lips half-way this time.
Fuyumi, in the meantime, had sat down on a nearby chair. Plans and methods of teaching ran though her head; it seemed to her that Miss Mary didnāt particularly like bookwork. Perhaps they could do some kind of an outing. That sometimes helped a student focus; her students could see how their lessons applied to their world outside of a classroom and often became more interested in the material. Although, if the rumors were true, Miss Mary probably had a better idea of how their world worked than most of Fuyumiās students. Her fingers tapped lightly aginst her handbag, her only movement as she thought.
She remained seated until the scratching of Maryās writing paused. Standing, she stepped towards the desk and Miss Mary. āHave you finished, Miss Mary-Weather?ā Fuyumi was already slipping her free hand inside her bag for the sheet music she had brought.
Mary checked over her work to ensure she did not make any stupid mistake before she blew on the ink to further dry it before she handed it over to her new governess wondering if the woman would be surprised that this "ill-bred" girl actually had some intelligence to her, sometimes it was amusing to witness, other times it was irritating beyond belief. Her blue eyes landed upon her watching quite curiously wondering what it was that she was going to bring out of her bag. Hopefully it was something good!
Cain ran his hands up the other boy's skin underneath his shirt caressing the skin gently with his own thin nimble fingers as he kissed along the delicate skin of Kuro's neck. Normally he was not so gripped by carnal needs but something had truly gotten to him and he could not control himself. "You are irresistible my dear," He murmured and he kissed down his body.
āI do admit I was surprised to find anyone here, although if that is meant as a compliment, I do have to wonder just who you had employed in the past.ā Sebastian was not at all taken by flattery, and even compliments, however sincere or otherwise were seen as a cheap way of swaying his interests. He did have to admit, privately of course, that the young man had a way of speaking that intrigued him. So very sure of himself, he had obviously been sent by Mr. Hargreaves, intent upon evaluating his dedication no doubt. Or perhaps to be sure he would heed the threats that had already been made perfectly clear. He had no choice he knew, but he was also astute enough to realize that it was a game. A dangerous one, played without rules or ones that were made to suit the main player, but a game nonetheless. He knew what it would take for him to stay in this place, and he was determined not to allow morals or standards to get in his way.
āCain,ā Sebastian repeated, the name an odd one, but nothing surprising after what had happened so far. He did have to wonder if that was truly his name though, or if he was merely toying with him. āThat isnāt something you hear everyday.ā He watched as the young manās legs lowered from the desk, his eyes immediately checking for scuff marks, although there were none that he could find.
Leaning against the side of the desk, he regarded Cain thoughtfully, trying to decipher him, but finding he was coming up with absolutely nothing. That bothered him immensely. āIndeed, although I do wonder, just what is it you were sent here to acomplish?ā
"Sent to accomplish? My you make me sound like an assassin, I assure you I have nothing up my sleeves in which I can harm you with," one of his mysterious smiles had slipped on his lips clearly enjoying and indulging himself in all of the reactions that Sebastian was bestowing him with, it was oddly pleasurable because it was unusual in this little realm. He pushed some of his bangs out of his eyes so he could peer at his companion without anything obscuring his sight. This man was physically interesting to the teen since he was truly unlike anyone that he had witnessed up to this point, and there was an air of reassurance and competence to him so that made him truly wonder if the rumors were true; well they had to be on some level if his father was withholding evidence to blackmail this male with. His father was just a horrible person, even he knew that, but he could not do much in his own current state of affairs.
Continuing to smile Cain stood up keeping his eyes trained on Sebastian as he leaned against the desk still making it quite clear that he was not leaving the room quite yet. "I am just here to extend a more friendly greeting to you from the company, I do hope I will see you here for a while. I am quite tired of seeing people disappear," he added wondering if this would give the male motivation or frighten him, either would be entertaining enough to witness.
The young man sighed softly, "I suppose I should leave for to stay longer would insight his anger on both of us, and I am sure you do not want that on your first day," he stated taking up his violin case in his hand since he did not want to leave it behind. "I do bid you a good day dear Mr. Michaelis and I truly do hope you stay around for a while," he offered one last smile before heading out of the door.
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Hesitantly Mattie nodded her head, eyes filled with worry. He looked very bad, and she was scared to leave him on his own, but she knew she couldnāt lift him with a lame leg. Her choices were to stay here as he died slowly of blood loss and hope someone would find them, or go search the massacred mansion alone. Not knowing how else to help, she looked around until she saw a cane nearby. Most likely for decorative use considering Cainās station, but perhaps it would be strong enough to hold her up?
Ā Limping painfully she made it to the hallway, not knowing which way to turn. Where was the kitchen, again? She had only been there briefly. Though somehow she didnāt expect to find the butler there. Cain wasnāt that well, and though he knew what his normal schedule would be, he hadnāt seen the carnage of the rest of the house yet. Mattie knew without asking that grievous damage must have been done- she had awoken to this madness before. The wallpaper was shredded from the walls, splattered here and there with drying blood from the previous night. A heavy trail of red on the carpetĀ had to belong to a corpse that had been dragged. Afraid, Mattie followed itās path far down the hall to an open room. Though she knew there was nothing in there that would attack her, she still hated to see the bodies, to know the faces of those that had died needlessly. But if it was Riff, she needed to know. Without the butler sheād have to find someone else to save Cain.Ā
The body was face down in the middle of the room. She could tell it was male, but not much else. Mattie moved slowly into the dim room, eyes downcast and pained. This was her fault, just the way Cainās injuries were. Why hadnāt she fled from them, the moment she had the chance? They had let her out of the cage, hadnāt handcuffed her or anything. She could have run, have saved them from all thisā¦. but she remembered Cainās kind look, his outstretched hand at the door of her prison. It had been so long since anyone had treated her like a human being, she had been loathe to leave it behind. Kindness and love, they were her weaknesses even when practicality should have won out.
Getting down on her knees for balance, she pushed the corpse over trying not to gag at the stench. No, it wasnāt Riff- just a manservant, someone she think sheād seen in passing in one of the halls the previous day. A noise at the door made her look up, startled. There stood the man she was looking forā¦ but what he must think of her now, Mattie didnāt know.
Cain's poor mind, suffering from blood loss, was recounting the days past and not the most recent events. Riff was always in the kitchen and doing his duties but today, much to his mind's dismay, was not like the days before because of the horrific events so of course he would not be doing the usual things. All the young earl could recall was glowing eyes, sharp teeth and nails in the darkness, but nothing else. He was much too weak to focus on much at all. The moment that Mattie left the room the aristocrat fell back into unconsciousness. Right now there was little purpose to being awake.
There were other two people alive in the estate besides Mattie and Cain, and right now one of them was desperately doing everything within his abilities to find the two others he hoped that were alive more then anything else in the world. The manservant held a cloth over his noise as he wandered and moved through the rank blood soaked halls, while this was incredibly disturbing his determination did not waver since more then anything he wanted to find his lord and his little sister. The thought of finding either dead scared him more then he could say.
It was on his search that Riff heard someone moving not too far away from him, he headed there at a quick urgent pace and that is when he stumbled across Mattie. He felt crestfallen and disturbed since he did have the feeling that she was the culprit of all this bloodshed, but how a young woman could have been capable of such things he hardly knew, nor did he have the time to find out. "Miss Maddie...? Do you know where Earl Cain is?" he asked, "is he alive?" more then anything that was what he needed and desired to know right now. If he had the comfort his master has not left this world; after he would do his duty and tend to all the wounded that needed his aid.
Hello all! Still happy to be back~ I am bouncing up and down on my bed in a very undignified manner because I am so happy.
Just have some chores to do this morning, then a yoga class (trying to slim down some weight) and then I shall be online and doing responses on my other account mainly (since I do believe I got to all of them on here, right? <3) Speaking of another account, I am going to switch the muse on my Lars (Girl with The Dragon Tattoo) one and to an OC I used to do on another site that I enjoyed greatly.
Basically he is based on Eclipse from Demon Diary, but I made some changes to his background story, powers, weakness, etc. But he is a Demon Lord~ So that will be fun. Here is a picture~
However, Cain will, and for always be my main muse and this will always be my main account and priority so no worries <3
Anyway, that's enough from my mouth for now, sorry to keep bothering your dashes with my drabbles!
I believe I have, at last, gotten to everyone's replies. So, if your reply was not posted that means I probably accidentally missed it so please tell me if I did skip it! Also, since I have everyone done please tell me if you wish to roleplay! I would absolutely love it and I promise I do not bite, in fact I assure you if you message me I will probably roll around in happy feels because that is just how I am.
Anyway, doing all those replies and asks was exhausting so I will get off for now, but I promise I will be on tomorrow as soon as I am able! So good night for now!
Also, fun fact, Draco Malfoy from A Very Harry Potter Musical is now my ooc faceclaim because I realized he is basically my spirit animal I refer not the cruel dickish personality traits of his, but rather how unbelievably awkward he is. So I hope you guys enjoy the pretty accurate depictions of how opposite I am of Cain in real life. In summary: he is a calm, collected, and mysterious English gentleman; and I am a socially awkward flailing and fangirling prone Irish girl.
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āAnd you never, ever will. As long as I am alive, things will not go back to as they were before I said hello. I would sooner return to my father than let that happen.ā And Gilbert meant it. He would rather relive everything then let that happen. He would remain by Cainās side, this he vowed, until his death. Before Gilbert knew it, his lips were on Cainās. He turned red at his blunt actions as he pulled back. āI-Iām sorry. Iā¦. I donāt know what came over meā¦.. Forgive meā¦.ā God, he hoped he had not screwed up.
Cain's bewilderment and shock showed on his doll-like features, the words from Cheslock's lips were the very words he had been craving to hear for his entire life, but to actually hear them for someone made his heart race. His shock was furthered when the space between them became nothing at all and their lips were actually pressed together. While he was shocked he was certainly not disgusted, as previously stated Cain was attracted to men and Cheslock was no exception, but he did not see this coming in the least. When it was broken his haunting hues connected with Cheslock's own, "please do not apologize Cheslock... to be quite honest I rather enjoyed it..." a blush covered his typically porcelain colored cheeks making him look very much like a doll.
Williamās smile grew even wider and his eyes teared up as well with tears of joy. āIām so happy.ā he murmured and slipped the ring on the otherās slender finger, glad that it seemed to fit perfectly, and he stood to hug his lover tightly and kiss him sweetly. āI love you so much, more than anything else. I donāt know what Iād do without you, Cain.ā he said softly, resting his forehead against the otherās as a few tears fell from his eyes.
"I am as well my love," never in his wildest dreams did he think this would happen, how could anyone ever love him this much? He watched and memorized the sight of the ring sliding upon his finger and a lovely smile took hold of his delicate features. He pressed back into that kiss wishing it could and would last forever but he never had such luxuries; but he would have William with him till his dying day. "Trust me William, I could not function without you now," he kept his arms tightly wrapped around him keeping their bodies close together, "no one has made me happier then you my beloved reaper..."
āHe is about this bigā¦ā He tied at least to show with his hands. āI meanā¦ approximately like a dwarf rabbitā¦ā Maybe this was a better comparison than just showing with his hands. āIt is really wonderful having this bird. Once heās entirely tame, we will import another one from South Americaā, Michael added proudly. Generally, although he loved animals, he also wanted to have something to brag about- though he assumed that he sure could show off his pets (and it was every single time really hard to convince his parents that he really neededĀ a cat/ a horse/ a parakeet.Ā )
āYou knowā¦ if you are a pessimist, you are probably happier if something good happensā¦ while an optimist always sees the good. It is the choice between constantly good weather and sunshine once in a while which you probably appreciate far more thenā And Michael was the one preferring constant sunshine. āAll attitudes have their own advantagesāĀ
The marquis nodded with a smile. āI enjoy attending all kinds of social gatherings or organize them by myself- such as I love dancing. Additionally, I am currently at the choir and often volunteer when it comes to organizing a fundraising eventā Always stress what a good christian member of society he was. āI also enjoy riding and visiting theatersā¦ I love dancing and spending time with my friendsā And ballet, and wasting a lot of money on fashion and things he didnāt necessarily needed.Ā
It was not hard for Cain to perceive how much Michael loved birds, and it was quite fascinating actually for him to experience someone that found such pleasure and delight in something so simple and innocent whilst it was now impossible for himself to do. "How wondrous, I do love animals and I wish I had the time and peace of mind to own some but I do have to actively take care of my estate and my little half-sister's well being so sadly I do not think I will have the time any time soon to dote upon an animal," it was sad to think he had to forgo such things but it was for the best.
"Very true, I do like to think that all the different perceptions have their purpose in the world, and that they are what make the world work for better or for worse," Cain perceived. The world needed pure people like Michael to see the world and all its beauty, and horrific homicidalĀ sociopaths like his own half-brother to remind the world of the depravity it could descend into if they were not careful.
A good Christan hm? Cain could not say he related to that. If there was any chance for him to have or accept religion into his life it was dashed the moment he was very consciously named after the first murderer (according to the bible) by his parents and subsequently punished by his own personal god, his father, for all his sins. He was not against religion but he could not abide by something that had been used to make him suffer as a child. "I am quite impressed, what a wonderful life you lead Michael," truly, he had not experienced someone so blessed by life as Michael was; it was then Cain realized the irony of their names: Michael was one of the most beloved angels in Heaven, and Cain the first murderer sentenced to forever suffer at God's hands. How utterly surreal.
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āHehhhnā¦thatās a dangerous man indeed.ā he agreed, rubbing his chin with a sleeve. āAnyone attackinā young ladies for no good reason has got too much energy, iffinā yāask me. Perhaps heās got some other problems not yet addressed? A madman wasnāt always mad, no never.ā
Scooping a bit of necrosis into a test tube, he corked it tightly, wiping it down with a rag before offering it. āPerhaps yeh can study it?ā
"I have never had a true conversation with him; and at this point in time I do not wish to because he is truly my enemy and nothing more." Some sympathies for his half-brother did reside in his heart because he did know for certain that Jezebel did face abuse at their father's hands as well, but those sympathies were buried in hatred that instantly developed when his half-brother almost killed his beloved half-sister Mary-Weather.
Despite it coming from a dead man's body, Cain did not hesitate to take the test tube, "I believe I will be able to do so," and hopefully it would bring him some answers and hope when he had none.
Cain withdrew his lips just enough so he could gaze into Kuro's eyes and whisper against the male's mouth, "you poor thing, you are gripped by the same lust as I am, what shall we do about it?" the earl inquired as he hotly nipped at Kuro's exposed neck.
