Cotton Candy Traffic Cones

having a best friend who meets your level of freak is unmatched. you present them with the most unhinged, deeply buried thought from the depths of your psyche and instead of blinking blankly they just go "oh absolutely"—and I think that mutual brain rot like that is the highest form of intimacy actually.

I feel like there’s literally no stronger swear word than when a girl in bonnet in a movie says something like, “But Lady Snapplecap says I cannot until I come of age!” and a dude wearing pants tucked into his boots and an open shirt replies, “DAMN Lady Snapplecap!” with the force of 435 F-bombs

Wait I just realized something. If Fareed has a sister, do we think it's possible that his sister could end up carrying Viktor???? I mean if Seth and Fareed decide they want a child and they need a mortal to carry the baby, wouldn't it make sense to ask his sister?????? Maybe??? Hmmmmm

no no no put me back in the loop I almost did it perfect please put me back just a few more tries and I think I could really nail it please put me back

Chappell Roan was right. it is like a hundred ninety nine degrees

some nights by fun really is the most 2012 song ever because its like: "the US government didnt give a fuck about the soldiers it sent to kill and be killed all for politicking points. the whole thing was a farce, costing countless people their lives. also heres a 30 second autotune vocal solo where i just kind of make sounds into the mic for a bit with a crazy filter."

[recommending something i sincerely love] ok so the thing about it is it kinda sucks

Why is this heat so hot 😩

It’s the heat

Source?

Ugh, I keep getting emails and they're not even from AO3

relentlessly funny to me when people treat a relationship between someone in their 30s and someone in their 40s as "age difference". bro i cannot tell you which of my friends are 34 and which are 44. i can probably tell you which ones aren't 30 yet, but it's probable some of them are 50 now and i didn't notice. if you're over 30 and don't have kids, it's kinda all one age until you can collect social security.