'Cora' Mason

As Cora tried to calm him down, it was actually working. That made him more nervous than he was before, because she had such a hold over him that she could calm him down. Over the years he’d done a really good job of controlling his anxiety, but the idea of falling in love again was terrifying to him. It had gone so badly the first time, he’d lost everything in one night. Everett had been cold before, or had tried to be, but after that he was even colder. When he first met Cora, he was stone cold. Only talking to her when he absolutely had to, salty about having to watch over someone. But over the span of his time watching her, she’d broken down walls and he had no idea how she’d done it. “I’m not who you think I am.” Everett shook his head, his voice filling with emotion. “For some reason, you think I’m this great guy…and Cora, that’s not me. I’m not good. I try to be, but I’m so fucked up.” He hadn’t been this emotional or open with someone in so long, maybe Lexi, but she was an exception considering she was his best friend in the entire world. “You deserve better than what I can give you, and I believe that.” He said firmly but softly, his lips only inches from hers as his heart stammered against his chest. “I don’t know why you’re so loyal to me, why you think so highly of me. I don’t deserve it.” Everett was partly trying to push her away out of habit, but also stating exactly how he felt. “Let’s not talk about her.” Everett murmured, shaking his head before he leaned in for another kiss, his teeth biting her bottom lip softly, moving down to her jawline, that jawline he loved so much. Everett pushed her backwards, placing his hands on her hips so he could pick her up and set her against the counter. It made it so much easier to kiss her when they were eye level with each other. One hand ran down her thigh, the other running down her side. God, her body was so sexy, and it was all over his mind right now. “Why are you mad?” He asked, eyebrows narrowed as he pulled away to look into her eyes. “I thought you wanted this…but if you don’t, just stop me.” He had half a mind to step back and stop kissing her, but they were like magnets. Once he touched her he couldn’t stop. He kissed her harder this time, much more passionate than they’d ever kissed before. She’d said she was mad but didn’t want him to stop. He didn’t want to stop, so he just listened to her, running his hand between the fabric of her shorts and her skin, making his way a little higher this time. “I don’t want to stop. I’ve been dreaming of this moment since I stopped working here.”

Was that something close to him calming down she could see in his eyes? The blonde wasn’t sure but she hoped against hope that it was since she’d hate to see him go into a full scale panic, so she just kept her eyes focused on his. Maybe it would give him something to hold onto or to focus on, wasn’t that meant to be a good thing? A focal point. When he started to speak about how he wasn’t a good guy she shook her head rapidly, all the way through everything he was saying, because she thought exactly the same thing. She thought, no she knew that she wasn’t a good person or the person that he thought she was because of the terrible thing she’d done. Should she just come clean, break everything off right now so that it wouldn’t be even worse later when he finally did find out, but instead she didn’t say a word. Just closed the gap between them once more so they could kiss passionately once more, trying to show him he didn’t need to think such negative things about himself because honestly she didn’t care. People were allowed to have done bad things right? At least he was, it didn’t make him a bad person or a broken person, simply a human. “Then we won’t talk about her for even a second.” The words came out a little mumbled against his lips, shivers racing down her spine in a delightfully satisfying ripple which made her shake a little, breath catching in her throat. Pulling away from a second just to speak the medical student shook her head again, a tiny giggle coming from her lips. “No, no i’m not mad at you. I’m saying i’m mad like I’m crazy, not mad as in angry. I don’t know what I could possibly be mad about right now apart from maybe you talking so badly about your own self. I’m not going to stop you, not for a second.” As she was lifted onto the counter a tiny squeak came from her, legs swinging slightly before they went right back to making out like lovestruck teenagers. Cora had never been kissed like this before, there was an intensity behind it that was new but amazing for the country girl. Almost knocking the air out of her as she wrapped her legs around his waist, arms around his neck, feeling her heart smacking against her ribs. “I’ve been literally dreaming about it since you left or were discharged. Or I was discharged from your care. However you want to put it, I used to dream so vividly that you were laying next to me i’d be confused when I woke up and there was no one there. Mel wouldn’t let me sleep in her bed with her, so I’d just use pillows to lay next to instead." A blush rose up her cheeks and neck when she admitted that, it was a lot more than she was thinking she was going to share when she’d started agreeing. “Gosh darn you’re so good at that...” She whispered as he ran his hands across her body. 

Everett had been known to have bad anxiety. It developed over time when he was younger, starting with panic attacks after Evie was born. He still battled anxiety everyday, but he had to overcome it for his job. And also for his son, who he never in a million years planned on having. Hadn’t he learned his lesson the first one night stand? And then Evan’s mom came around, and it was baby number two. Except this time he didn’t have Ellie. Legally, he was all alone. Except for Lexi, who was all but Evan’s mother. They’d had a very serious conversation after Evan’s biological mom left about how Lexie would be more than willing to fill the position if needed, and Everett trusted her more than anything in the entire world. She had been Evie’s godmother, now she was Evan’s, but more just the mother part. “Fuck, jesus…Cora, I’m not mad.” Everett sighed, running his hand through his hair again, which he did when he was nervous. “I’m not mad, I’m scared.” His voice was barely audible, because getting any sort of emotionally confession out of him never happened. But she looked at him with those blue eyes, those goddamn blue eyes that had such a hold over him, and he felt like he was moments away from a panic attack. Letting someone in again wasn’t an option for him, not when he had a son to look after. As he listened to her speak, he shook his head, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “No, I disagree. I’m glad I’m not being paid to do it anymore, because I don’t want you to think I’m obligated to be here. I’m here because I want to be, because I,” he paused, stopping himself before taking a deep breath. “I still care about you. I still feel like a teenager with their first big crush. I hate feeling this way. I hate being vulnerable, Cora. I’ve,” he stopped again, his breathing picking up as he felt a panic attack coming on. “I’ve been through so much, I-I’ve lost so much, I’m so fucked up. And I don’t know why a girl like you would fall for a guy like me…you could have anyone.” His honey brown eyes showed how scared he was, and opening up was only making it worse. “No, it’s not that easy.” He confirmed, letting out a nervous sigh. “Every woman I’ve ever cared about has ghosted me. Cynthia left me the fucking minute she had Evan. Ellie left me after Evie died because I was so damaged. Now I’m doing it all alone. I’m a single dad. Think about that, it’s just another reason for you to run.” It was sad because Everett truly believed this, even though it wasn’t true. Everett let himself get lost in the kiss, not thinking about anything but her. Again, he was being selfish. Everett pulled away, resting their foreheads together. “That’s what you want, right?” He asked, just confirming before he went back to pressing their lips together. “I could stand here and kiss you all night.”

“Shh…shh…” Cora hushed him in a gentle voice, not wanting him to get stressed out which was clearly the direction he was going, she could hear the panic in his voice and it tugged on her heartstrings. She’d never herself suffered from a panic attack until her first day in court, she’d broken down on the stand into floods of tears. It had felt like she was going to vomit her heart, unable to catch her breath no matter what she did however she tried to distract herself. Her vision swam, head thumped so hard she was convinced she was having a heart attack, and from that moment onwards she’d regained a new appreciation for how people dealt with anxiety disorders and issues. “Don’t wind yourself up Everett, it’s okay, it’s all okay.” Her voice was low, trying to be as warm as humanly possible without patronizing him in any way, that was the last thing he wanted to feel right now. “I know….I know you hate it but it’s okay. There is nothing you could do or say that would shock me, or make you think any different of you, trust me. You could tell me you…I don’t know….I can’t think of anything right now but I promise you there is nothin’.” Her voice twanged with compassion, clearly choked up with emotions, on the brink of tears because the pain he’d been through was painful to even hear about. “Cynthia is a just such a peach, we know that.” Voice heavy with sarcasm now, it was shifting with every new thing Cora said, but honestly she was angry at these women. She was angry because she knew what it was like to throw someone under the bus for personal gain, that was one thing, but they’d thrown their own children under the bus for their personal gain which in her eyes was abhorrent. For someone to pass over the faces of those angels that she’d been shown photos of, it wasn’t something she even know how to comprehend. She tried to show her feelings and support through the kiss as her hand moved up to the back of his head, tangling in his relatively short hair, forcing herself to not let out a small moan, but this resolve lasted all of five seconds before a small noise of pleasure slipped from the base of her throat. Moving their lips together once more, even when he went back in for a second time, the blonde couldn’t help but smile a little her heart singing. “You can stand here and kiss me all night if you wanted to, I’m not going to stop you. I’m mad, but i’m not an idiot." Her heart was hammering i her chest at this point, both from excitment, nerves, as well as the lack of oxygen that came with them not separating for a moment. “Just don’t stop...there is no need.” 

This was the exact reason they shouldn’t be alone together, and he knew it. He’d known what he was walking into when he walked into her apartment earlier, but he didn’t stop himself from doing it. He couldn’t, he wasn’t strong enough to walk away from her completely. Everett had tried to get used to not having her around after his job was finished, but he felt like part of him was missing. He couldn’t tell her that though, could he? No, he couldn’t. That was something he wasn’t strong enough to do, especially when Evan’s mom had just walked out on him for a second time. “Tea is fine.” Everett nodded, knowing it would be more like American tea if Cora had bought it. More like what he was used to growing up. Something about that was completely ironic, especially since she’d always felt like home to him ever since he met her. “Mad? What would I be mad about?” He asked, narrowing his eyebrows as he looked down into her eyes. She hadn’t done anything wrong, he had no reason at all to be upset with her. “I stopped getting paid to do it months ago. I’m always going to want to protect you, that’s never going to go away.” And it was true, it never would. When he was around her, he wanted to make sure she was safe at all times. Cheesy, right? He was basically making himself into a stereotype, and he was the furthest from it, but not when Cora was around. The effect she had on him made him do crazy things, and it was hard to get used to. And there she was telling him she wanted it, he had no idea how he was restraining himself the way he was. Years of practice at work, but this wasn’t work anymore. He was at her apartment because he wanted to be, and she was literally begging him to kiss her. “I’m not disguising it as anything…it’s just not that simple, okay? It’s not that easy for me.” He shook his head, pressing his lips together before he quickly walked back over to her. “Come here,” he said firmly but softly, his hand resting on her cheek. It was only seconds before his lips were on her’s again, a little harder than he’d kissed her earlier. He couldn’t fight it anymore, not when she was practically begging him to do it.

“Yeah?” She nodded her head delicately, walking over to the fridge so she could pull out a carton of ice tea, in a plastic jug that showed it’s deep amber color through the clear sides, it was something that made her feel connected to her home and family. Even when she was very far away, painfully so sometimes. Filling two glasses with ice she poured it over, the sound of the cubes cracking as they gradually defrosted the moment the liquid hit them. Cora had no idea what was going on in the mans head which was in a way why she was so edgy about the situation, people could often see what she was feeling but Everett was the exact opposite. He was clammed up so you couldn’t read what was going on in his head, in his heart even. “I don’t know, I don’t know what you’d be mad about really I just…thought I should say it. I don’t know.” Voice held a slight edge at this point, even as she passed him his drink, taking a sip from her own to allow the cool peach to wash over her tastebuds. It was like a breath of fresh air, it was a relief and she needed it. “Sometimes I wish you didn’t stop getting paid to do it, I feel less guilty about taking up your time when you’re at least getting something out of it. Yanno?” The blonde chewed her bottom lip a little, eyes sliding to stare into the liquid of her drink before she moved to put it down on the counter gently. When she turned around though, he was right next to her, making the girl audibly gasp slightly, her back now pressed against the raised countertop which she gripped onto with both hands, heart pounding again all of a sudden. What was this hold he had over her, it was like a weakness the girl had only known once before, it was elating and scary all at the same time. “It’s not that easy for you?” She whispered, staring up into his eyes with her light blue ones, worried if she looked away the hole scene would dissolve and she’d wake up since this was something akin to the dreams she’d have at night not long after he had left first. They would be peppered with nightmares about her time in jail, the incident all sorts of things, that she’d always wake up to find he wasn’t there to save her from. At he whispered for her to come here she did as she was hold, almost holding her breath before their lips pressed together, a tiny sigh escaping from hers. This wasn’t their normal kind of kiss, this was a hungry kiss with passion behind it that Cora sank into as her whole body moved forwards towards his slightly, one hand moving to grip the top of his right arm gently.

“You’re about as terrifying as a puppy.” Everett murmured, chuckling as he looked over at her. Was Cora herself terrifying? No, but this feeling he had was. It was like she had this crazy hold over him, and for him it had been instant. He had thrown such a fit when he got the case, saying he wasn’t a babysitter and had no place watching her. But as soon as he met her, it was over. He would’ve done literally anything to protect her, and he knew he fucked up by letting her get too close. By letting them get intimate, even if it was only kissing. That was still a big deal for him, to be so vulnerable with her, and he knew Cora knew that. Especially now that she knew Evan’s mom had ghosted him. As she pulled away from him to get him a drink, he sighed. He was upset with himself for not kissing her, even though he though it was the right thing. Not to kiss her, not to open that door back up again. The kiss in the car was meant to be a goodbye sort of thing, yet here they were not saying goodbye. How was he supposed to stay away from her after this? Everett followed her into the kitchen, contemplating whether or not he was going to kiss her again, but he was arguing back and forth with himself in his mind. “Anything is fine, seriously.” He shrugged, letting the blonde decide what she wanted to get him to drink. As she apologized he could see the look in her eyes, that she was disappointed he hadn’t kissed her. He was afraid if he kissed her again, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself this time. “We can’t,” he murmured, not finishing the sentence. He sighed again, running a hand through his hair before he began walking towards the fridge, almost as if he was pacing back and forth. “Evan is fine, the babysitter is with him. Evan isn’t what I’m worried about.” He said firmly but softly as he began walking back towards her. “Earlier…I just lost control. Because you do that to me, you make me so vulnerable.” He murmured, feeling like he was going to throw up at that confession. “You deserve better than me, kissing you earlier was selfish…and I’m sorry.” He was so nervous, he felt like his hands were going to start shaking any minute. “It’s driving me crazy how badly I want to kiss you again, so don’t think that’s it. I’m just trying to protect you.”

“A puppy would be terrifying if it bit your face.” Cora giggled, pulling anouther of what she thought might be a scary face but in reality wasn’t at all. “I’ll work on my scary face and get back to you, how about that?” She offered, swallowing hard at their proximity seconds before she moved away. If she was stronger, more confidant, maybe she’d lean over and kiss him herself she thought, only problem was the girl was a traditionalist. She wanted to be wooed, but she also wanted Everett, it was like a catch twenty two. She watched him walk over to the fridge, wondering she she’d made him angry with the way she was behaving but it wasn’t something she’d chosen, honestly Cora was so anxious she didn’t know what else to do. “I uh....I have ice tea. I had to scout around to the markets before I found somewhere that made it but I found it.” Her southern twang seeming to get even stronger at the mention of something she used to drink at home all the time, blue eyes smiling even in the absence of a happy look on her face. “I don’t...please don’t be mad...” She whispered, unable to stop vocalizing her worries even though it was a selfish act, if he was angry it would make things worse, if he wasn’t it would make him feel bad. Eyes met as their eyes meet once, she all but stopped breathing in vain hope he might be about to give in and kiss her, but instead the words that followed made the blonde’s heart sink. “I don’t need protecting anymore, remember? You stopped protecting me months ago.” It was all Cora could think of to say in favor of the act instead of against it. Sure she wasn’t a little girl, but did she feel safer when she was with the agent? Without a doubt. Instead of wondering what might be right around the corner she just thought about what was in front of her, and that was him. “It wasn’t selfish, if it was selfish it would have been something that only you wanted.” The confession nothing unusual to her since she was used to showing her feelings, but more scary because of how dead set against it he seemed. “Don’t disguise it as something for me...” Cora’s voice was almost unintelligible as she whispered it, upset in her eyes like they were about to overflow at any second. 

Everett just looked at her as she cleaned his wound, admiring her really. How beautiful her eyes were, how beautiful she was in general…how attentive she was. How good of a nurse she was going to be. Part of him was in love with that quality alone, how she wanted to dedicate her life to helping others. Some would say the same about him, even though he did it very very differently. In his eyes he was a monster, even though that wasn’t true. Everett couldn’t be a monster if he tried. He stayed completely still as she cleaned it, too busy gazing at her to even notice if it did hurt. But he had such a high pain tolerance that it wasn’t bothering him, it was just annoying to have to patch it up every couple of days. “I’ve never seen you be scary.” He teased her, a light smirk forming on his lips. He just chuckled at what she did after, shaking his head. “You’re so fucking adorable. I’m sorry…I just thought that was adorable, not scary.” He chuckled again, honey brown eyes lighting up as he looked at her. As Cora got closer and he felt their noses touch, he knew she wanted them to kiss again. Suddenly he didn’t feel his wound at all, all he could feel was his heart beating out of his chest. He was so nervous, a kind of nervous literally no one could make him feel except for Ellie, and she was long gone. He figured he’d never feel that again, he’d never truly be in love again, yet here Cora was making him feel that feeling again. His stomach had butterflies, it was hard for him to breathe. But he knew they shouldn’t kiss again, he was still kicking himself mentally for kissing her in the car, even though he didn’t regret it. She was finally free of him, but here he was back in her apartment as if no time had passed at all. He felt guilty and lucky at the same time. “Thank you.” He murmured as a small smile formed on his lips, not pulling away from her. Even as his mind was screaming for him to lean back, he just couldn’t do it. “Yeah, a drink would be nice.” Everett nodded softly, their foreheads touching after he did so. “Whatever you have is fine.” Although the last thing on his mind right now was a drink, he wanted to kiss her again so badly, but he was using every ounce of self restraint he had. “I should…I should go soon, I’ve already taken enough of your time.”