You gave me light but never told me 'bout the fire

henrik just can’t pronounce prostitution

tarjei can’t draw hearts

henrik truly can’t blink and punches things when he’s annoyed

tarjei actually struggled with the locker

tarjei and marlon wouldn’t have escaped the police after the party

gay guru was a thing already at the end of s2 (and tarjei came up with it?)

david and tarjei make each other crack up every time

david actually has the william hair

henrik really likes to win videogames

julie lives to arrange actors on beds

The exact opposite to what his father did with his mother.

People with borderline generally suffer from something called abandonment sensitivity. We have a fear of being alone, being rejected, or being left behind. This usually results in hyperfixating on things or people, idealizing relationships in order to maintain closeness and feel important. It’s hard to end relationships because there’s this desire to keep the door open, in case everything else falls apart and we need to fall back onto something or someone. It stretches us thin. 

Of course Nico’s fear is to be the last man on Earth- there’s no one left but yourself. You have no one left to turn to, no one left to distract you from how overwhelming it is to be You. It only makes sense that he would add Marti to his hypothetical; he wants the boy he loves to be with him, to stay with him. He sees Marti as an extension of himself.

But it also makes sense that it took him so long to end things with Maddalena. When you’ve known someone for so long, it’s only logical that it would take some time to untangle yourself from them. But with Nico, it’s not so simple. Maddalena has been the person that Nico could fall back on when his other relationships (relationship in the literal sense, a relation to another person) fell through, someone he could rely on to bear the brunt of his mood swings, the jagged edges of his insecurities. The longevity of their relationship proved to him that she would stay through it all, she wouldn’t abandon him. So the idea of leaving that familiarity behind, even though the love in their relationship having gone stale? That must have been terrifying. Nico was so used to never ending sentences, only commas, that to end that sentence was probably one of the biggest leaps of faith he could’ve taken. Knowing that Marti could very well reject him, leave him behind because of what he hasn’t told him, and still hoping to god that he’ll stay.

But things can’t stay good forever.

And Nico knew that an episode was inevitable. He knew himself, knew that something had to give, and just prayed that it would be a long time until it happened. That he would have time to sit down with Marti, tell him stiltedly what was wrong with him, and prepare him for what being in a relationship with someone like Nico exactly entail. And somewhere in the back of his head, screaming over the flood of happinessexcitementlovemartimartimarti was telling him to pull back, calm down, get some sleep, call mamma, protect Marti from what’s to come. But he couldn’t, and he tried so hard to keep the lid secured, but everything came spilling out anyways. There was nothing he could do.

And after waking up from the blur of the weekend, to the staunch faces of his parents and Maddalena, he knew that everything had crumbled. He couldn’t wash away the stain on his and Marti’s relationship by himself. He could only pray that it wasn’t as bad as it looked. He could only hope Marti would help him fix things. But as he sat with himself, in the same cycle as always- his mother’s thinly veiled contempt and resignation, the droning of his father, the twisted malice infused pleasure Maddalena got from seeing him at her mercy- the more horrified he felt. His stomach well past his feet now, through the ground into the earth at the idea of Marti, alone, chasing after him through the night in a city he’s never been in. He suddenly feels like he can’t breathe.

But the ember in his chest, though trapped under all the shrapnel and rubble, still glows so he sends a text to try to tell Marti that he knows what he felt was real. That just because he loses control sometimes, doesn’t mean that he doesn’t know the origin of his actions. That he knows that he can be a hurricane, but at the core of it all everything is real, and calm, and intact. That his first thought in the morning is the same as his last thought at night, and both are of him.

“The giraffe’s heart is far from her thoughts. She fell in love yesterday, but doesn’t know it yet.”

And then, radiosilence.

Even though it hurts, that’s something Nico can deal with. Because his mind can go wild with every single reason Marti hasn’t answered. But then:

“ciao.”

And now Nico can’t pretend, everything is painfully real. He can’t travel every pathway that might somehow lead to Marti. Because he knows Marti. He knows that there truly is not a mean bone in his beautiful body, and that this is his way of saying goodbye. There are no more open ends, no more sequels, no more commas. The end of a paragraph. The end of a story. The end of a sentence.

hello lovely anon!i was going to write a short and simple answer, but i ended up basically writing a dissertation, i hope you don’t mind lol.

i don’t think this one has a necessarily fixed meaning. i think it sort of changes and evolves together with niccolò’s mind, with whatever he’s thinking and feeling in a given moment.

let’s start from the very beginning:  the whole “last man on earth” thing started when martino talked about that tv series. niccolò said it made him feel sad to think about it: he’s scared of being alone, since for a good portion of his life he has felt alone “in his head”. of course we know he was referring to his mental illness, which causes him to feel distanced from other people, but martino had no idea at the time. martino says he understands but, of course, he doesn’t. not fully.

martino and niccolò then spend their day together and presumably bond a lot. when martino wakes up the next morning niccolò isn’t there, but he left a note in which he jokingly says that martino is the last man on earth because he released the virus. here it’s still only a joke based on what they talked about the previous day.

from this point on though, whenever the “last man on earth” theme resurfaces, niccolò always includes them both in the equation. that means that something shifted in his mind. he found someone he could really connect with, someone that finally didn’t make him feel alone “in his head” — that’s when it became the “last MEN on earth”. suddenly that thought becomes appealing to him, rather than scary. he wants to be alone with martino because that’s when he feels at peace. he feels suffocated by maddalena and his parents trying to control him, trying to tell him what to do, think, and feel — he literally says it when they’re in bracciano: “i want to figure out on my own how i feel”. with martino he feels free, and the virus becomes a sort of liberation from everything else, something desirable. 

in the flip book he writes that he is actively looking for the virus because he wants to be left alone with martino. 

in the note that he hid in the dictionary, niccolò uses the virus as some sort of stratagem, giving martino an alternative with its antidote: martino can decide whether he wants to take an antidote for the virus and therefore not be the last men on earth with niccolò anymore, or take an antidote for niccolò’s “impossible personality” and therefore forgive him. it’s basically a more elaborate version of those notes kids pass around in elementary school that say “do you want to be with me? yes or no”.

they reconcile in bracciano and everything is cute and soft and we all loved it.the theme then makes its comeback in the milan clip. the whole reason niccolò wanted to go there is because he felt so frustrated in rome, with his mother smothering him and maybe other things we didn’t get to see. he longs to be with martino and “sleep next to him” (as he writes in the text). so they go to milan and they’re happy together, but then things start to go south.

this is where the idea of being the “last men on earth” is taken to the extreme. in niccolò’s mind, the virus stops being metaphorical here. it becomes literal, it becomes reality to him. he really believes that martino and him are the only ones left in the world. and he’s happy about it. he then runs away naked, martino is terrified and heartbroken and i don’t want to talk about it.

i also think the theme could still come into play in this friday clip somehow (i’m scared).

clip 9.2: marti googles bpd. he gets a drawing and a love quote from nico. he doesn’t think it’s real. he’s just an absurd and crazy idea to him, right? it doesn’t matter that he has never loved someone that much, because it’ll never be mutual. so he blocks him. nico is now sure marti doesn’t want anything to do with him.