a private affair best done collectively

Instead, I read. I read a lot. I’ve always read a lot. When I was younger, it was books. Mostly fiction, but I read a few serious books here and there.

Once I got older, I started reading more on the internet. This was both good and bad; I read much more content, but a lot of that content was also of less consequence. Clickbait designed to get you to well, click; think-pieces on topics that no one will remember in a week; hot-takes on controversial news that are just slightly remixed versions of someone else’s take. So long as people are trying to make money through content creation on the internet, this stuff will exist.

But there’s also good stuff! Incredible news and reporting that take advantage of the web’s ability to instantly share a story with a massive audience of curious people. Beautifully laid-out stories that leverage the flexibility of web publishing with modern design. Hilarious round-up pieces that pull in reactions from random voices on Twitter to create a narrative. Brilliant satire. Incredible insight.

The transition from books to online has been a little rough, but it’s been entertaining, it’s been fun, and it’s been incredibly educational.

But I also think that it ruined an important Part of Myself, or at the least somewhat stifiled it. That Part of Myself is my creative drive. The Will To CreateTM.

This feeling of being stifiled was more than a little bit influenced by the internet. And also a little bit influenced by being in college, but that’s another topic for another time.

The internet lets anyone make their voice heard. This is both good and bad; it gives thoughtful people a massive platform to make their case, but it also enables trolls to babble nonsense at a virtually infinite rate. And there is, quite literally, a virtually infinite number of internet-trolls out there. You could be one of them! These people have something to prove, but are only capable of doing so by bringing others down, instead of lifting them up. They are weeds on the lawn of the internet, the bad apples, and no matter how much effort we put in, no matter how hard we drop the banhammer, they will exist.

But there are plenty of people who do try to lift others up! Incredible thinkers and writers who take advantage of the web’s ability to instantly share a story with a massive audience of open-minded people. Brilliant minds who create the next Facebook or build the next Reddit (please, someone build the next Reddit and fix all the problems with the original one). Incredible creators who express themselves using whatever medium fits them best, all connected to each other, thanks to the web.

My Will to CreateTM was stifiled by the bad stuff. The trolls, the meaningless clickbait and hot-takes. I was worried, and maybe even a little scared. What if my thoughts aren’t worthwhile? What if someone out there violently disagrees with my perspective on things and decides to take it out on my emotions? What if my hot-take was just a remix of the last ten other takes on The Next Relevant News Story of The Moment?

I decided to stop asking myself “what if?” and instead to Just Do It. Just start expressing my thoughts. Just start making things. Just start writing.