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I think it's because it's typically associated with "severe" autism and autistic people with high support needs, so since the most visible autistic activists are not in this category they don't care.

But meanwhile I hit myself on the head every day. Every. Single. Day. I also bite my hands if I don't use my chew necklace. I wish I could stop doing that but apart from saying "not all stims are healthy and you should stop harming yourself" they don't suggest anything. And I'm really scared to injure myself really badly for doing that cause my skull hurts and I feel dizzy.

I do this to express frustration and anger, idk how to do it differently.

Same for agressive behaviors. When I was a child, I hit people when I was frustrated. I remember hitting my grandma's arm and my family having to leave earlier than intended because it was just too much. I was confused and scared and I felt so ashamed.

As I grew up I learnt to suppress these agressive behaviors...and direct them against myself.

I wish there were resources for that but I can't find anything.

Stimming isn't just flapping your hands and jumping. It's biting yourself, it's hitting yourself. It's hitting others. It's banging your head against the wall. Stimming isn't always cute, sometimes it's dangerous.

I just want to learn to stop hitting myself on the head cause it's dangerous and that hurts but nobody talks about it unless it's in meltdowns :( But for me it's not just during meltdowns it's all the time.

Something I've seen suggested by some people that autistic people hit themselves during meltdowns as a way to get deep pressure because hitting is deep pressure. So things like weighted blankets, vests, stuffies, and lap pads can help and so can things like harnesses, braces, tight fitting clothing, and other things that apply pressure to our bodies could possibly help.

Same with biting ourselves. I bite my hands and arms when I'm really overwhelmed (this doesn't happen as often as the hitting especially because I have chewies now and I try to keep them on me) and it has a similar affect because biting ourselves supplies deep pressure both on the area we are biting and on our jaws.

When I'm feeling the urge to hit myself I will use something weighted, chew on a chewy aggressively(especially ones that I can chew with by back teeth because it gives a lot of deep pressure.), Wrap something stretchy around one of my body parts (like one of the stretchy noodles around my arm or hand for example), wrap myself in a blanket, or one of my big go to's if I have a flat stretch of wall is to stand or sit against a wall and just rock back into it kind of gently (or not so gently depending on just how overwhelmed I am). I also head bang which isn't great for my head but the rocking into a wall thing can help with that urge to do that too.

Alternatively you could build a meltdown kit with things that would help you during meltdowns (sensory toys and aids, cards that suggest things to do when you are in a meltdown or after a meltdown, and a pillow for hitting. What goes in a meltdown kit will vary depending on what will help the person who needs it and it might take time to figure out what helps you.