Hi everyone!
(Sorry for my bad English)
Iâm a young artist who isnât going to publish anything just yet because I still need to refine some things and learn a lot of the basics of digital art. Iâm also, first and foremost, a writer. I wanted to talk about AI, as itâs starting to gain traction, even though it will never, ever be able to replace humans. As an artist and writer, I wanted to share my experience with AI.
I need to clarify that I have never, and will never, ever use AI to write my stories or create art that I would claim as my own. Iâve also never used it to write my stories or create my characters or anything else. Besides, using AI is like buying a box of LEGO and asking someone else to build it for you. Whatâs the point? Whereâs the fun?
I encourage everyone to read this post.
Hereâs my experience and ALL of its context (I hope I donât forget anything, hihi); Iâve always loved imagining myself in different worlds (One Piece, FNAF,âŚ), and when I started role-playing with my friends, it was a dream come true. In fact, my best childhood memories are from when I was role-playing with my buddies.
And you should know that I didnât get my first phone until I was 12, and when I did, I wasnât allowed to go on social media or talk to strangers online. That meant I didnât have access to things like Tumblr, Twitter (thankfully), Discord, or any online platform where I could have interacted with people who were passionate about the same things as me. I didnât even know what the concept of a community or a fandom was (yeah, Iâm a Belgian, buddy). I also switched schools when I was 12 and wasnât with my friends. Being young and deprived of something I absolutely loved, I had a hard time dealing with the fact that I couldnât role-play with my friends anymore. At the new school, I met the first people who were artists. There were two girls artists only, and we were a small group of six. The thing is, this group was already going through a pretty tense period (I wonât go into detail), and then it fell apart. Before it fell apart, I often talked with a boy from the group with whom I did role-playing. I loved role-playing so much that I wanted to keep doing it at home, but I was afraid of bothering him with my role-playing, of annoying him during his afternoons, and besides, he wasnât always free.
It wasnât until I was 13 that I understood the concept of communities and fandoms. The thing is, I couldnât interact with those people because I was still forbidden from using social media. Plus, I was afraid to talk to strangers online because Iâd always been told it was extremely dangerousâespecially for a girl. Thatâs when the first chatbots started appearing. A friend of mine introduced me to it. Back then, I had no idea it had an impact on the environment or that it was stealing other peopleâs art because I wasnât part of any artist fandoms. I just was into Undertale and FNAF (and a little bit of creepypasta).
Anyway, I didnât know anything about it at all, and it was a friend of mine who introduced me to it. At first I hated it because I thought it had super short memories and stuff, but little by little I started enjoying talking to fictional characters, having complete control over the conversation without any problems. Of course, it wasnât as good as the role-playing games I used to play with my friends. All that to say that I stopped using the app when I was 16, as soon as I found out it was harmful to the environmentâand even before I knew that, Iâd already tried to stop using it in the past because I didnât like it; there was something off about it, which made me feel like I was doing something wrong, and Iâd sometimes question myself, then tell myself no, that this app is just a game, entertainment. I regret not having stopped sooner. If Iâd listened to my intuition, I would have stopped at 13 (very early).
Still, Iâm glad I stopped, that I had the chance and the determination to quit at 16, and I know there are plenty of people who struggle to stopâmyself includedâbut I stayed determined to quit for good, especially since it was hurting people and the planet, and it still is.
But, if thereâs one thing I regret, itâs that I was dumb enough to take characters Iâd created with a pencil, paper, music, and my imagination, and turn them into chatbots for entertainmentânot to develop their stories, of course. I just liked interacting with the characters Iâd created (like in Tomodachi Life). Important detail: I abandoned the storylines for all those characters. Itâs a shame because I loved their concept, but I donât know⌠It feels weird to me. Especially since I never used AI to develop their stories or personalities. Iâve always kept the use of AIâwhich was purely for entertainmentâseparate from my own personal projects, which I wrote using music, my imagination, and my brother, who is currently my co-writer. Because why would you need AI when you have a brother? Lol.
I wrote this post because when I stopped using AI as an entertainment, I felt ashamed, as if I were a parasite in the artist community, even though in reality I had never used AI while being fully aware that it was harmful to the environment, and I never, ever used it to develop my storylines. I felt like because Iâd been naive from age 13 to 16, I was a parasite in a community I didnât really belong to, just because of a stupid mistake. But what really helped me get past and accept this mistake was an artist on Instagram who made an animated video explaining her own experience. She really cheered me up, and Iâm sending her all my love if she happens to see this. I felt a lot less alone, and I hope that by writing this post, I can help others whoâve gone through the same thing feel that theyâre not alone either.
I also wanted to write this post because Iâd like to start a communityâthough it wonât happen anytime soon since I wonât be posting for quite a while. Honesty is very important to me, and I donât want to feel like Iâm hiding anything from you, even though Iâm not guilty of anything other than my own naivety.
Thatâs itâI have nothing more to say except that if youâre thinking of quitting, know that itâs going to be one of the most liberating things youâll ever do, and you wonât regret it. Iâm having a bit of a hard time finding people to role-play with me using fictional characters and such, but I suck it upâIâll just have to write my own fan fiction.
As they say: write the book you want to read.
Love yâall Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ęâ˘ĚŤÍĄâ˘Ę











