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Imagining a therapy exercise where you color in a little guy where it's ok or not ok to touch (green is going ahead, yellow is ask first, red is no) and most of the cast are pretty normal looking but Alastor's is entirely red with helpful arrows at different body parts like "no" "also no" "fuck you" "DIE" ofc he also gave him a huge demand smile with an arrow pointing at it labeled "I bite :)"
Charlie, with increasing levels of emotional devastation because she thought everyone likes hugs "Alastor you're supposed to use more than one color" and Alastor is very proud of himself was like "yes I know"
he gets frustrated later when he tries to explain that Charlie, Mimzy, and Niffty have special little lady permission to give hugs (and in Niffty's case climb him like a tree) and Charlie is cursed by the knowledge that even if he says it's fine he secretly hates it and says he doesn't have to put up with something just to make other people feel better. Which somehow makes him even more angry because how dare you suggest that he's catering to other people's feelings and isn't a cold heartless monster!
Also if it's revealed that touch is fine as long as he's the one initiating it she's like "ooooh so you don't hate touch you just want to control when and how people interact with your body" and Alastor's like when you put it that way you make me sound like a kicked dog.
Over all just a very miserable experience for him to assert and explain his physical boundaries but the long term benefits are worth it in the end.
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Oh boy, a complex character who's a woman! I love messy characters who hurt everyone around them and continue the cycles that hurt them!! Can't wait to share this joy with fellow fansâ why's everyone calling her a bitch
Au where Alastor accidentally misses his entire season 2 arc because he didnât go to the lounge that morning
More notes and thoughts about this comic and the making of it under the cut!
- this took 61 hours to make
-there was brief consideration of having Alastor do a more like,, normal squat with his knees up before I promptly decided that wouldnt work for both character and artistic reasons
-the stupid little stool is so short because otherwise niffty wouldnt be able to reach đ
-his pupils being super constricted after coming out of the shadows and all the light hitting him suddenly, + seeing so much iris makes him look especially unhinged I think
-itâs so odd putting niffty into a situation where she isnât having unhinged levels of fun so this feels ooc but I am channeling my personal concern through her
-him getting annoyed with her âI donât have to do anythingâ but subtly acknowledging that the trust they have goes both ways âIâm not going to a doctor. Im coming to youâ while still not genuinely able to make himself ask for help and instead turning it back onto her âcan you do anything worthwhile?â And then putting pressure on by threatening to call the whole thing off after sheâs thoroughly concerned and he knows it âor should I dismiss you back to the hall?â
-OH ALSO UHHH pretend niffty picked up nursing practices when she was growing up around older women during ww2. Thats how im justifying this.
-"did someone hurt you?? I'll kill them!" Hilarious thing to say to alastor of all people im sure he'll take kindly to that honey. But also you did â¤ď¸ you did kill him. Good job <3
-nifftyâs magic poof effects are meant to look a little bit like bubble bath bubbles
-ânice try thoughâ âworth a shotâ ânot reallyâ I just think that dialogue is funny
- there's a lot of expression work in this that i'm really proud of
-I like the moment between Alastor joking in response to nifftyâs concern âyouâre burning upâ which is meant to be in regards to further confirming infection that sheâs worried about but he just plays off, and the resigned silence from her before she continues being concerned for him regardless of him brushing off her feelings. I donât think he wanted to answer her question either, but in his infection induced bleariness he promised her candor
-Alastor is really good at hiding pain, when he expects it. I think the reason he didnt react as much when vox ripped out his stitches was that he clearly saw what was coming and was like "oh ok this is going to suck" but he genuinely didnt think anything of what was about to happen and then suddenly nifftyâs whole hand was inside his chest đ
- Full torso wrap with the bandages would entail shirt removal (and even more physical contact) which is, i feel, on brand for niffty's unhingedness and simultainiously something Alastor would never be comfortable with, which is kind of what knocks him back into his own head and realizing what exactly is going on and what hes allowed to occur. And like. Wow okay hard part is over i know what i need to do now im ending this as quick as possible actually goodbye.
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Jax: man I sure am traumatized by the severe abuse I faced from my mom. And now I'm even more traumatized, because I kept repeating the cycle of abuse by making the girl I liked commit suicide. I feel like I have the blood of two deaths on my hands. This is terrible and I feel constantly miserable, how will I ever fix this or make amends.
Gangle:
Jax: ok so hear me out just one more go around with 0 changes to the ride and I'm sure it'll work out this time.
What are Jax's true thoughts on Gangle? Like i know she likes to bully Gangle in particular but we see moments where it seems like she actually thinks that they're friends almost (like when she says "what? She likes it when i'm mean to her") and ofc the scene with her in Jax's mind
I think Jax takes his complex feelings on his mother out on Gangle, but tries to justify it to himself through delusions that it's not ACTUALLY abuse, even though it is. Most abusers don't ever think of themselves as abusers, and tend to make up a reality in which their abuse is either not that big a deal or it's somehow warranted.
And from Gangle's perspective, she was at a very vulnerable place when she joined, and Jax took control of their relationship. She formed a bit of a codependent bond with him even though it just mostly caused her pain. Losing a friend who frequently hurts you can fill you with complex feelings that are really hard to make sense out of.
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