like hell i do

all i really want to do today is crash my car into a building at 90 miles an hour & die instantly but unfortunately i’m busy until 6

i can’t handle that reaction without completely panicking.

still wanna blow my brains out, but like, with vigor

why sleep when you can overthink? it’s way more fun, guaranteed!

when does it end

i'm having a panic attack but instead of feeling panicked i am fucking dissociating. wild

do i really wanna answer that

i can see the signs of my resurfacing alcoholism & i am aggressively ignoring them

i said the wrong thing at the worst time & i am so sorry

i thought sleeping would make me wanna die less hmmmmmmmmm

i have a lot of regrets. i have a lot of hopes.

yes, i still have bad habits, & yes, i fucking hate them

when you realize shit at 12:30am consistently

tfw you four years later recognize something as the trigger it is, have flashbacks to all the abuse you suffered, and end up in a panic attack at 1230am

eeeeggghhhugheugheughhughhugheuhhhghhghgghgh

i just want to scream loud enough to flatline my brain & murder my emotions

ha ha ha i feel weird