Stories Can’t Hurt Us

The only time its used as it was intended, was after Blood of Arlathan, but almost immediately the Dalish are forced to leave it.

Cause god forbid the whole debacle should happen again, not like we didn’t just leave Elgy standing there with a pout on his face, the guy who literally just raised his fucking archdemon and can easily capture more elves with a snap of his fingers now.

I mean, he can move the moon, right?

Oh, but I guess that doesn’t matter.

This is a video game.

And we beat the level, so the powerful bad guys can’t do the powerful thing anymore because we stopped them through sheer force of...

Actually, Rook didn’t accomplish a goddamn thing.

It was all Solas.

Remember him?

The dude that the “hero” treats like shit, yet they have the audacity to keep demanding information from him without so much as a thank you.

Rook is an ungrateful little cunt.

After the entirety of not only setting him up in inquisition, but in trespasser too.

What the fuck was the point of all that if you were just gonna stick him in fade jail?

All because the game director is a little baby that doesn’t like this character and can’t set aside his own biases to write a good story!!!

Contrast this with Witcher 3, where apparently a lot of the game developers didn’t like Yennefer, and there was an entire scrapped sub plot where she turns in the lodge to the emperor, but ultimately decided to leave it out because that’s not who she is.

In short, the game developers were able to set aside their own biases for a fictional character to put in a narrative that made sense.

My moral code aligns so well with his.

Unlike Rook, who doesn’t even have a moral code.

I have… a lot of screenshots of him.

Lile… so many 🤣

He’s unfairly photogenic.

The peasant just trying to sleep:

If people are wondering why people hate the hinterlands…

It’s that one.

Like, fuck you bitch, then why did I spend so much unnecessary time collecting blankets for refugees, hunting down rams for meat that the hunter of the crossroads apparently can’t do himself because he sucks.

I literally helped find a lost druffalo, ffs!

I freed captives in a red lyrium mine.

Did you do anything like that, Lace??? Hm?

Oh, and I also liberated the refugees in the Emerald Graves by helping secure a better base of operations that wasn’t a goddamn cave.

Oh, i guess you can free two slaves in Minrathous, but it doesn’t mean anything because you never hear from them again and they were faceless NPCs, anyway. And it’s not like it added flavor.

I’m replaying W3, and I came across this elf woman who was being harassed by two dudes.

And when they went away, she turned to me and basically told me to fuck off 🤣

But then I was able to let a succubus go instead of killing her, so at least someone was grateful. Even though she told me to fuck off too. 🤣

Bioware: The reward is friendship!

Me: I don’t give a shit. I prefer money. So treat me like a prostitute, and give me that sweet gold.

Bioware: You don’t care about the bond with your companion?

In the fact that it gives you dialogue choices, but no actual choices to make. It’s a paradox. 

I don’t know what’s worse: Andromeda giving you mostly two options of saying the same thing, on the rare occasion it gives you four.

He’s either mistaken for his more successful older brother or people only know him as “Miley Cyrus’ ex”.

Maybe Solas is a lot better than Olgierd, because his soul is very much intact, but there’s still plenty of nuance in Olgierd’s character to be compelling

And then, imagine if Solavellan had been written similarly to Iris and Olgierd.