Chz's page

Galaxies are yurinating...

don't say it like that

everyone in the entire world lives in chicago

if you don’t live in chicago you actually do btw

my dad is very intensely involved a battle with his city’s public administration over a playground they have tried to forcibly remove like five times in the past 20 years and DID remove once in like 2005 but then had to rebuild because my dad was such a pain in their asses and came through with undeniable receipts of the zoning plan from the 60s/the historic/cultural value of the urban planning…. like there’s a woman in the city office who is his arch nemesis. he is literally the daredevil of urban planning

everyone in the tags needs to stop saying they want to fuck my dad.

I got hired to do a stand-up comedy set at the trope villain convention. It was a great gig. Really appreciative crowd. They were absolutely cackling the whole time. It was a little weird at the end though when all of them stood up and started clapping very slowly, before saying, in unison, "Well done, my friend. Well done."

One of them said he really liked how relatable my comedy was. Apparently it made him feel like we're not so different, he and I.

The really funny part is that many modern sources that want to gas up Sparta will bring up this specific anecdote, but stop at the "if" and just not mention what happened immediately afterwards.

similarly, "μολὼν λαβέ" (come and take them) is a really cool thing to say, made significantly less cool by having them taken

my beautiful wife, severe thunderstorm warning, is texting me 😌😚😍😍

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

sometimes i see some cool art of Blorbo but before i reblog it i peek in the notes and discover. it is not, in fact, art of Blorbo. it is art of Squub. i have no idea who Squub is.

my humours have balanced. I have become mentally normal again

makes your puppy dusty

Yeah its baically Dusty puppy thursday

@ominous-signs

idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????

'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa

the world is so big and beautiful