Joy Sullivan, from Instructions for Traveling West: Poems; “Of Wildflowers”

Granny Weatherwax comes to me

speaking words of wisdom:

* I’m at one right now!

* I went to one today

* I went to one within the past few days

* I went to one this week

* I went to one within the past few weeks

* I went to one this month

* I went to one within the past few months

* I went to one this year

* it’s been a year or more since I went to a public library

* I’ve never been to a public library

* it’s complicated

* see results

I’ve heard a lot of advocates of inclusion say things like “kids with disabilities work twice as hard as everyone else” or “my employees with Down’s syndrome never come in late or take a day off.”

This sounds like praise, but it isn’t.

The time disabled people spend working twice as hard as everyone else has to come from somewhere.

There are reasons why kids aren’t in school every waking moment. There is a reason why vacation time exists and why it’s normal to be late occasionally.

People need rest. People need leisure time. People have lives and needs and can’t do everything.

Being disabled doesn’t erase the need for down time. Being disabled doesn’t erase the need for play, or for connections to other people.

Working twice as hard as everyone else all the time isn’t sustainable. Praising disabled people for doing unsustainable things is profoundly destructive.

People with disabilities should not have to give up on rest, recreation, and relationships in order to be valued. We have limited time and energy just like everyone else, and our limitations need to be respected.

I like to use the term “liminal activities” to refer to the kind of things we do that are generally overlooked as activities that take little to no effort/time or are a sort of “background” for other, more relevant, activities. Getting dressed, washing ourselves, going to the bathroom, getting things in order, preparing food, doing housework, leaving the house/going somewhere (like, the things in between starting to get prepared to go outside and arriving at destination)… you know, the activities you don’t even think of as actual activities, just tiny things. Like lacing your shoes or brushing your hair before you go outside, or opening the car door and sitting inside, or putting your dirty dish in the sink.

Most people don’t really think of those activities as time/energy consuming. How long does it take you to go to the bathroom and pee? Is it tiring for you? Have you ever tried counting the seconds it takes you to get down a flight of stairs? If you don’t have a physical disability, probably not many.

Botanical Applique Quilt by Chinami Terai (Japan)