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Are you trying to tell me that your spectrum of flirting isn't based around the extremes of incessant ragebaiting and one eye contact per week?

Lowkey going out on campaign with your politician father sounds so fun. Like imagine being a little Roman and bonding with your dad while he crushes the barbarians.

Writing essays is kinda fun because you can simulate the progression of the reinforcement of the thesis by not really knowing what you're building up to.

School is so funny cause its the government being like "hang on for a decade or two while we catch you up to speed on everything that's happened before you were dropped in."

I know I should put on lotion to save my Poor Thirsty Skin, but, the patterns, are kind of pretty. Also the texture of lotion is slime sadness.

I just finished short analysis 3 six minutes before the deadline. Another win for the Sockless community. Wear your blue coat

Taxidermy is strange because you see the animals and you know they are dead but your brain is a little nervous bc shape recognition is faster than reason.

Is unreasonable paralyzing dread something that can be diagnosed? I just feel like it would be nice to have something to tell people when they ask why I didn't answer their text for 7 hours.

There should be a spotify wrapped feature for instagram and tiktok. The people deserve to be faced with their own folly. They should be reminded of the day they scrolled for 17 hours.

so my roommate left a roast in the kitchen sink for 12+ hours and shows no signs of moving it soon. I and some other roommates tried to convince her that you can't eat meat that has been left out because bacteria, but she will NOT listen. She just keeps saying that her mom told her to. Do I just, like, let her eat it?